Apple?
Hmm…it seems that the first part of my response did seem rather ambiguous. But I am a hetero woman. Except for that one time in college…
She keeps offering it to me, yet I keep her at arms length (and she sucks cocks, too).
Moral dilemma, I know. What to do?
I love your flute playing. It’s quite melodic.
Time for a username update.
Lorena Bobbitt has a GREAT recipe for penis pies…but that’s not for this forum, try a Cafe Society search.
But I do enjoy pie. Just not the hairy kind.
Cherry pie is my favorite
Wait…
Ok, back to the subject at hand! (Or should I say subject at mouth)
69? Don’t forget 68. That’s where she blows you and you owe her 1.
Don’t the hands feed the mouth?
I like the blonde jokes from earlier in the thread. When did blowjobs get so serious?
Depends on the technique.
Been a while since I’ve heard that one! I chuckled 
There’s an entire blowjob-bar industry in Thailand including one nationwide chain, Lolitas. Really, no joke. Website (NSFW):
Although the branches have grown fewer. The Patpong location closed because of the stiff (heh) competition, as there were no less than four (4) other independent BJ bars in the immediate neighborhood. But an American – no, not me – bought the site, opened yet another BJ bar called Mike’s Place and has made ago of it. Website (also NSFW):
A few years ago Mike ran all-you-can-drink specials that included one free BJ – not from him but rather from his lovely lasses – for 1500 baht. Today that’s about 50 bucks American, but the baht has strengthened, so it was an even better deal then. But I think he lost too much due to the overwhelming response and so has not offered that for a while.
Bottom line: You’re right, BJs should be fun and not so serious.
This is the ad that was displayed at the top of this thread a moment ago.
Fitting
Usually if I like pie, I just simply take some pie filling, spread some random dough over the top of it, throw it in the oven and call it pie.
Its fun until one of those lovely ladies gives or catches an std. Men are gross.
That actually happens much less than Westerners seem to think, particularly in the BJ bars. The latest entry in the BJ-bar industry is Som’s Haven (NSFW):
Som is a lovely lady whom I’ve been acquanted with for ages. She herself was a legend in Bangkok BJ circles. Really. She quit the business, married an American – again, not me – and with partners they opened Lollipop1 BJ bar. (The “1” in the name was to distinguish it from Lollipop go-go bar in the nearby Nana Plaza red-light area.) They sold their share to the partners last year, and then Som opened this place just a couple months ago, and just because it’s her, she’s already making a big go of it even though she no longer provides service herself. An absolute sweetheart of a lady.
It’s big business here.
It just seems wrong that a woman has to give Bjs to make a living. I don’t know why it seems so wrong to me, but I don’t see it as empowering, or uplifting, or healthy for the woman in any way.
And every guy reading this is saying, “Come on, you took video, right?”
There’s actually a serious and long-running labor shortage in Thailand due to all the international companies coming in and setting up factories. Any one of those ladies could get a factory job without much effort searching. But this pays better, and the hours are better. And believe it or not, even the working conditions are better. Some of these ladies have even fled their factory job to work in these bars.
Just different strokes. So to speak.