A friend of mine has never had it done to her before…although she seems to think she wouldn’t like it. Her reason is that she’d think it would make her feel too vunerable.
Me, I’m telling her she should give a try sometime, because I’ve always seen or heard of MOST women enjoying it and chances are, she’s probably lose or forget the feeling of feeling vunerable pretty fast. However, I’m not positive. Maybe I’m talking out my ass. I’m a guy after all, but it just seems to me that most the females I’ve known who’ve had it done really enjoy it.
I understand there will be a lot who probably don’t or would feel uncomfortable with it, too, though, hence this poll.
So a couple questions. Do you enjoy having it done? Before the first time, were you unsure or uncomfortable with the idea too?
I don’t remember being nervous or uncomfortable with the idea beforehand either. First person that did it was my (former) husband though so I was past any feeling of vulnerability if I remember correctly.
Oral sex (IMHO) tends to make me feel far more vulnerable than normal intercourse, so I can understand your friends concerns. That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy it on occasion, but it needs to be at just the right time with just the right person. Technique is not paramount btw, 'tho it helps I guess.
For what it’s worth, I do enjoy oral sex with my husband. However, he’s the first and only person I’ve enjoyed it with. It has nothing to do with vulnerability and everything to do with technique. For some reason, all the guys I dated before my husband managed to tickle me instead of arouse me. Yes, I’m occasionally ticklish down there. And it’s one of the biggest physical mood killers I’ve ever encountered. Few things will make a guy feel worse than trying to please a woman and have her shriek with uncontrolable laughter. And few things will make me feel worse than being tickled during sex of any kind - it’s so ticklish if a guy does it wrong that it borders on painful.
I’m not a woman, but I’ve discussed this with one of my friends who quite adamantly does not want to receive oral sex ever. She apparently gets seriously squicked out by the thought of licking female genitalia herself, and this somehow creates issues with someone else going down on her. “A penis is so nice and wonderful, but women…ick.” I find it a bit unfortunate that anyone would find part of their body (a very nice part IMHO) to be icky. Oh well. She has lots of other issues and hangups too.
As with Ruken’s example, I have a female friend who used to be completely grossed out about the idea of someone having such a close up look at, let alone a taste of, her female anatomy. She thought it was the most disgusting thing imaginable, which was particularly odd to me since she had some bisexual leanings.
In the past year and a half, however, she finally began to explore her bisexuality and ended up in a romantic relationship with a woman who has been a lesbian since her teen years. Having her tell me about her first receipt of oral sex was hilarious – “Oh my GOD, Asi…I had NO idea!”
Suffice to say she’s an enthusiastic convert these days.
I have dated two women who were not the biggest fans of receiving oral. In fact, they weren’t the biggest fans of giving it, either.
The first was my first GF that I had a serious sexual relationship with. She would let me go down on her, and would go down on me, but in both cases just for a short time and never to orgasm for weither of us. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but she eventually allowed me to stay down there a lot longer because she liked how it felt (all her previous BFs sucked at giving oral, it seems, not adding to her enjoyment of it.)
The second girl I dated who hated (well, still hates) oral was sort of the same way. She hated getting it because it grossed her out. She tought the female anatomy was a little nasty, and the idea of someone down there icked her out. Plus, she was always self concious that she would smell or taste bad and that would make the guy not like her anymore. I was able to convice her to let me down there four times total, and one of those times she was drunk. Just to give you an idea of how much she wasn’t a fan, she was perfectly willing to try anal sex (which generally seems to be the biggest taboo for women to experiment with) before she would let me down there. Her reasons for being against giving oral though were different. She didn’t consider a penis nasty, she jsut had an abusive relationship when she was 15 where the guy forced her to give him oral and beat her when she didn’t, so I can see why she would have a problem with it.
I hate it. (Which is weird, because the first time I a guy went down on me, I. Saw. The. Face. of. God. But that is the one and only time I’ve enjoyed it.) I hate it more when a guy tries to convince me that I’m crazy and I should let him try, cuz he’s sure I’ll like it when he does it. (Yes, disrespecting my feelings really turns me on.) It’s a combination of feeling icky about my pussy and it really not doing anything for me. Which is odd even further because I love giving head and am very sexual and sexually responsive otherwise. I just really hate it and thinking about it turns me off pretty instantaneously.
Yeah, i went out with a woman who didn’t like giving or receiving. It makes for a pretty dull sex life, and i told myself that i wasn’t going to land in a similar situation again if i could help it.
It makes me sad to hear that women find their own genitalia “icky.” It just seems so self-loathing.
IMO, oral sex is more intimate than intercourse. Of course, kissing is also more intimate than intercourse. After all, I live in my head, not in my pussy. A joining of the genitals is not an especially intimate act if the head isn’t involved.
It is nice, and I liike for my husband to feel like he has done something important, but I could go without it and not miss it. Honestly, it is very hard for me to get off that way. No matter how good the guy is, I normally get bored with it.
I love it. But I always feel kind of shy about actually asking for it. I don’t have a problem asking someone if I can go down on them. No one has ever said no, so I’ve been fortunate not to have partners with issues like the ones previous posters have mentioned. But if it’s about me, I am a little reluctant to ask for it. Not because I think genitalia are gross or that mine are, but just that it feels selfish to receive oral because I’m not doing anything for the other person. I don’t feel that as much as I used to, though, after having a boyfriend whose favorite thing to do (which he liked more than receiving oral sex himself or any other sex act) was give oral sex. He made it clear that there was nothing else he’d rather do and that he really enjoyed it. Needless to say, although I generally come easily from oral sex anyway, I’ve had the best orgasms from it with him.
I think a lot of women need to know that the guy honestly is enjoying himself, before they can relax and enjoy it too. I don’t want oral sex if it’s grossing out the guy, but he’s doing it because he thinks he should, for one reason or another. That’s why most sex guides for cunnilingus recommend that the guy express his enthusiastic enjoyment of it.
Technique is particularly important here, I think. Women take longer than men to reach orgasm, and if oral sex isn’t done well, it can be a long and frustrating experience for both people.
Oddly enough, there were a few decades there when it was pretty rare to get oral sex. I’m glad it’s currently back in vogue.
I love it. I have only one rule: if for whatever reason, I wouldn’t go down on it, I won’t make anyone else go down on it. In other words, if I’ve just finished exercising - no. Let me take a shower first, please. Joining is optional, but the showering is mandatory. That kind of thing. I want to be sure the experience for the person giving is pleasant enough that they’d want to do it again. I expect the same in return.
Alright, I have to ask… how many women feel this way? Any why?
It would never occur to me that a guy would be “grossed out” by performing oral sex. There is nothing “gross” or “icky” about a healthy vagina, and anyone who thinks otherwise is not someone I would have sex with.
My first wife didn’t like it. But then, she was raised to believe that sex was “dirty” and was something that a woman only did to satisfy her husband. :rolleyes:
My second wife loved giving and getting it so well that she went looking for it with half the state of Oregon. Needless to say, we got divorced.
