Ditto. Thank you, Gemma. Some women make men into bastards…only because you men are wimpy and easily pushed around.
Sorry, let me start over. Some men are wimpy and easily pushed around. Then, there are some who can’t be pushed with a steamroller. Guess which ones we’re more attracted to?
I think you hit the nail on the head.
The latter. I’m learning to be that guy.
Let me just check the facts:
A hot chick asked to borrow your phone to deviously let someone you dislike know that you dislike them. You let her do this, because your pns was in control of your actions…
She messed up, and you tried to correct the mistake (presumably before giving her the phone back so she could send the message).
You accidentally sent the message.
You then told the guy in person that you disliked him.
This upset him, and you blame the woman.
Hmmm. 
It might be interesting to allocate blame between the woman, your brain and your pns, but I will instead suggest that you need to educate your pns to be impressed by a different sort of woman.
If we’re being pedantic about it… of course the blame cannot be laid solely on the woman. Or indeed at all. My point, and my thread title is based on the idea that Love makes a man do things he would not normally do. She exists, I know her, I love her, I let her have my phone for this purpose, The message got sent.
Like I said the guy is tolerable when he’s alone… and I can tolerate annoying people when I am of sound mind… but since I met this girl (and especially recently) my mind is far from ‘sound’.
No one’s being pedantic. You were stupid, let your dick control your thoughts and actions and then when you fucked up, you tried to blame it on the woman you “love”.
You seriously need some help, here. You’re making a spectacle of yourself and I mean that in the very worst way.
Does this dislike of this guy have anything to do with the fact that he likes this same girl? and/or do you see yourself in this guy and not want to acknowledge that his weak points are yours too?
You and I have had our differences before. You are the one. The only. Doper who has said things to me that have hurt my feelings.
Having said that I know I did the wrong thing. I know I was stupid. My penis was not in control here… it was my mind all the way. My penis gets all that it asks for. It’s my mind that longs for what it can’t have.
In which group am I making a spectacle of myself?? Are you refering to the SDMB or my group of in-person friends or both?
Perhaps a better title might have been “This Woman brings out the Bastard in Me”?
Oh please. This woman didn’t make you do squat. Stand up and take responsibility for yourself.
(BTW, was it “her?”)
FYI My boss has been asking me for advice on how to fire this guy. My boss is a COO of the company. He’s ten years older than me. What does it say that he’s asking his subordinates for this kind of advice???
Not knowing you in person, I can’t say whether or not you’re making a spectacle of yourself to your offline friends but these weekly billets-doux are misconceived and positively embarassing to read.
Well, I am inexorably more seemingly ‘in control’ with my ‘offline friends’ than you seem to believe. I still have integrity with my aquaintances
I never implied a single thing about your relationship with your acquaintances. All I know of you is what you post and, I say this without rancor, you really need to get it together or at least stop painting such an unflattering picture of yourself.
Well put.
Lobsang, being in love with this girl - if that’s what this is - is not an excuse for anything.
I don’t care what you’re like in real life-it’s how you represent yourself here that counts, because that’s all we have to go on.
Please, seriously, seek help.
You don’t see anything wrong about you and he both liking this girl, her knowing it, and her “encouraging” you to send him a text message saying he’s a jerk, going so far as to write the message for you?
You once said that she manipulates people, but doesn’t manipulate you. Riiiiight.
Aesiron might have been the only one who has said things to hurt your feelings, but he’s not the only one thinking them. This thread is complete garbage.
Indeed he’s not. Lobsang, please join the party here.
So, wait, you think that guy is the one with problems? And you dislike him because of the way he acts around this girl? Perhaps you should be taking a look in the mirror, because that sounds very familiar. Though really you dislike him because he’s with this girl, right?
Look, I don’t want to be harsh, and I’m sorry you’re having a hard time, but your posts in the last few months have been getting disturbing and weird. You need help. At the very least you need to stop obsessing over this girl. Get some help.
Lobsang, I haven’t read of any of the other incidents surrounding your attraction to this woman, only this one. Let me offer you some advice in the spirit of brotherhood:
Go to your car, or borrow one if you don’t have one. Slam the driver’s side door on your genitals four or five times really hard. Perhaps with little Lobsang out of commission for a time you’ll be able to think more clearly about this woman.
I can understand you wanting to nail her. There were/are lots of women I consider emminently nailable; some of whom I actually even did nail. Key Point Coming Up. At no point did I ever win a fair maiden’s hand by behaving as a clueless dufus.
For the guy whose feelings you hurt, offer an apology, but not excuses. He’s a guy. We’re used to having our feelings crushed by life itself. He’ll recover.
For Her: Gird up thy loins as a man. No more cutesy games, especially when drunk. Even if she turns you down flat, you’ll be in a better spot than frightful, embarassing debacles like this one.
I’ve watched a goodly number of my friends carry torches and behave foolishly over some particular woman. None of them accomplished anything but looking foolish. Certainly, the women in question were never inspired with love by their actions.