“All rise…”
Jeez, I’ve heard of cross-examinators “pumping the witness” for information, but this is rediculous.
Tripler
And Lord knows what he did with that gavel. :eek:
I don’t think I’ll ever read “the judge’s chamber” in the same way again. It’s going to be an interesting season in the appeals courts. “I didn’t get a fair trial. The judge’s little head was doing the thinking!”
And whats with the machinery? If you’re so gross, your own hand won’t have sex with you, well, I mean, damn!…
I hope you all can understand that, while I try to fight my own ignorance as much as possible, I simply cannot bring myself to google “penis pump”. I don’t know why. It’s not like I haven’t googled far, far worse. But this one really makes me shudder for some reason.
It was always my understanding that “penis pumps” were used to help with symptoms of erectile dysfunction, by encouraging increased blood flow to the penis with a reduction in, er, local atomospheric pressure. Use of such a device always struck me most decidedly as a means to an end, and not the end in itself, as I cannot imagine how the sensation of having my dick in such a vacuum that blood must rush to it to prevent a kind of simultaneously aneurytic and embolic ballooning of the corpi cavernosa (could expansion of blood nitrogen give one “penile bends”??) would be at all erotic by itself.
But here we see, clearly, the pump is being used for masturbatory purposes. Does the judge need a bit of artificially-augmented turgidity before he “pounds the gavel”, or is he actually getting off on the pumping itself? Are there devices out there, going by the name of “penis pump”, which are marketed for the purpose of directly providing an arousing stimulus?
Pumps are also used for penile enlargement.
Corpora.
Think “Austin Powers”.
Sorry, I’m thinking “Dirty Old Redneck Judge”, and I’m trying not to…
The charges will be dismissed because the evidence won’t stand up… 
Yeah, there’s no hard evidence.
Yes but this judge certainly was not soft on crime.
Mind you, if a hung jury doesn’t discharge him, he’s looking at a stiff sentence and a permanent stain on his record.
make. it. stoooop!
Easy Spirit has come out with one.
It looks like a pump. Feels like a sneaker.
I’ve heard the phrase “power loves a vacuum,” but this is ridiculous. (Ditto “multitasking…”.)
This is one judge you really wouldn’t want to hear say, “I hold you in contempt…”.
Oh, the power he used to wield, with a few strokes of the pen… now doubt he had an elevated opinion of himself.
What with the impending trial, I imagine he’s really feeling the pressure now.
I heard that in his last years on the bench, he was having a mechanical attitude about his work, and just basically going through the motions. Apparently, he was finding the bench less than stimulating.
Damn. I remember when a Judge having his palms greased meant something totaly different.
I understand much of his judicial philosophy is derived from Justice Thomas, whom he regards as a seminal influence.
Quote:
Donald Thompson, 58, entered a not guilty plea yesterday to three felony counts during an appearance in Creek County District Court, where he worked until resigning last August. According to the…probable cause affidavit, Thompson exposed himself during three separate 2003 cases (two of which were murder trials). For example, on May 13, while he was presiding over State v. Kurt Arnold Vomberg (who was accused of killing his girlfriend’s 21-month-old daughter), Thompson loudly pumped himself up.
The sword of justice is being wielded again. But, wait, what is mightier than the sword?
The pen is.
Only on the SDMB would a post about a court case degenerate into a series of penis jokes…and then be momentarily derailed by a lesson in medical Latin. God I love this place.