asstrologer – someone who will “read” your posterior.
necromancer
blastrologer: specializes in the Big Bang
vulva
Ha, beat you lieu, still, can’t resist…
volva - boxy, but safe
emancipation
neckromancer: studies the failures of people that overextended themselves
eflancipation: to fling flan
plagiarist
plaguerist–someone who fakes being deathly ill to get out of work.
reticent
recticent : A secret quiet fart
showdown
shoedown n. A shin-kicking contest.
electronic
electironic - like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a battery operated knife. Like a free ride in an electric car, when you’ve already paid…
alibi
aliebi - A false alibi; ex: “Errr, yeah, CuriousCanuck was here all day, I definitely saw him between those hours, so he couldn’t have been stalking Alannis Morrisette.”
<also>
allybi - An aliebi from a friend.
ultrasound
ultra-sound: not just sound (well-made and sturdy), but, well, ultra-sound.
impetuous
limpetuous - of a sudden desire to stick to something
aglet
Anglet: an acute angle
Fugue
Fuguest : A guest that you can’t remember inviting
bland
Blanding: an innocuous place on the stairs
Soprano
soaprano - an insubstantial and failing actress intent on “relaunching” herself as a pop diva
or
sopranose - condition affecting the nostrils, causing them to whistle or “sing”
fiddlesticks
Fishlesticks: a preposterous yet tasty halibut dish
Pancreas
St. Pancreas Station: A famous London terminal for the traveling endocrinologist.
Jingle
Jinglee: an inordinately happy tune
conjugate
conjuregate : Sex that was literally magic.
duodenum
doowopdenum: melodic stomach rumbling
reference