Smoccasins- Shoes that Scylla wears while tip toeing through very messy tulips
Tulips
tutips – the edging on a ballerina’s skirt
ballerina
ballereeses - chocolate, peanut butter, and Dr Schoals
shutout
slutout - the exposure of a seemingly respectable woman as a tramp
respectable
respectacle - Aretha’s glasses.
equine
equaline - par for the (race)course.
antivenom
auntyvenom - reason for why we all hate visiting our aunts.
concorde
auntievenom - a really mean relative
relative
Ah, the conjunction of brilliant minds… 
goncorde - an obsolete airplane
relative
relatease - my large breasted cousin giving me a lap dance. 
incest
nowincest - pretty much a bad thing all around.
bumpkin
humpkin - again with the incest…
inflate
kinflate - overfeeding relatives at the holiday get-together
confabulate
confabulous - lyingly saying how great someone looks
prognostication
agnostication - the withering of religous belief to a state of not knowing.
reverberate
Reverbarate - use of any four letter words when complaining about hotel, telephone, etc. rates.
Innocently
innocenturyly - being pure and chaste, due to old age.
chad
chald - the feeling of being simultaneoulsy chilled and scalded
scalding
skalding - ringing a bell while drinking hot liquor
beloved
meloved - narcissistic to the extreme
narcissism