glooves mittens for horses
expert
“Glooves” – 
rexpert - an authority on royalty
royalty
** Royowlty ** - Long wails oftenly heard at Buckingham Palace after each new tabloid release.
** Mirror **
Merror - a bad reflection
bathtub
bathtubby - extra large bath for the more portly build
portly
poortly - referring to indigent people who somehow manage to maintain a substantial girth.
president
apresident – a former leader of a French-speaking republic
geopolitical
ghettopolitical - relating to politics designed to appeal to the needs of inner city minorities.
dilemma
** Dilemmings ** - Jumping off the cliff, ot not jumping off the cliff?
** Splatter **
splatte - sound made when you throw your coffee at the wall
frothy
** Frosthy ** - What happenned to your snowman when you put it on the stove to get it warmer, “poor thing it’s so cold out there!”
- It’s snowing here! yeaaah!*
** Snowman **
snowmoan - something that you say when you wake up and have to clear the car before going to work
snowdrift
** Snowdraft ** - When your wife calls you on duty to clean up her car and the driveway from all the snow the wind brougth this nigth
** Driveway **
- Signing off. I’ve been snowdrafted
*
Drivelay – The naughty deed that gets you cursed for hitting an old gypsy lady because you were not paying attention to the road.
galvanize
Alvinize - to record a popular song in the high-pitched style of Alvin and the Chipmunks.
windmill
wingmall - where angels buy their wings
hijack
hijerk - somebody who hijacks.
cluster
clauster - to confine in a small area someone who’s afraid of confinement
confinement
consosoment - less than ideal conditions when one is incarcerated.
dregs
Dr. Dregs – rap CD’s available for $.99 each in cutout bins
sampling