Maybe not the worst songs ever written, but certainly the worst ever performed, on this page.
I was gonna say a toss up between that and “hand in my pocket”
both of which sounded like they were written by a 7th grader thinking she was being really deep.
Although the Shatner thing…
and I had forgotten about Madonna’s American Pie…
And pretty much anything by the Beach Boys grates on my nerves.
Q: what did one dead head say to the other when they ran out of drugs?
A: “man, this music sucks…”
Worst ever by a novelty act:
Mr. Tambourine Man by William Shatner
Worst ever by an act that actually pursued a musical career:
Mother by The Police
Wow. The second time I have slammed that song today. Heh.
If you’re ever in a masochistic mood, Try and sit through any album from her original Bosstown psychedlic band, Rotary Connection.
I nominate:
Toto’s: Africa & Rosanna
Billy Joel’s: She’s Got A Way
Journey’s: Open Arms
B Adams/Sting/Bon Jovi: All For Love
Beatles: Yesterday
Stones: Wild Horses
Foreigner: I Wanna Know What Love Is
Simple Minds: Don’t You Forget About Me
Tears For Fears: Shout
The Cars: Drive
Just about anything from Phil Collins solo career.
I have a feeling, somewhere out there is a compilation album that includes all these tracks
Jay-Z - '03 Bonnie and Clyde or whatever that song is called.
I say that Officially, the worst song EVER was[ul]
[li]Yellow[/li][li]this annoying song that went “See my BRA, underneath ma shirt…”[/li][li]SK8R BOI (Why didn’t this song get nominated?)[/li][li]and Living la Vida Loca[/li][li]and it’s disney ripoff, Livin la Vida Mickey(!)[/li][/ul]
In gym class, the gym teacher seemed to play the last song when something “Big” happened or there was a school event.
This song was so bad it caused one kid to kill himself by basket ball to stomach at supersonic speed.
;j
Afternoon Delight. Has to be. There couldn’t be anything worse, could there?
I second the nomination of Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” – gah, that is a horrid song made worse by a horrid singer.
You beat me to it, NutMagnet!
How about “Knock Three Times.” Yeah, I’m going to date a psychotic stalker – riiiiiight.
And “Take a Letter, Maria.” EWWWWWWWW! What a total dick!
I realize Dave Barry discussed these at some point, but I didn’t hear “Knock” until I moved here and to my horror one of the local oldies stations has it on their playlist. It’s creepy and weird in its cheerfulness.
“Butterfly Kisses” - can’t remember the artist…
This song makes me violent when I hear it!
Also, Anything by Sugar Ray or that ridiculous band “Chumbawamba”. YACK!!!
I’m surprised no one has mentioned Eddie Murphy’s Party All the Time or that Don Johnson song. Damn those songs were bad.
Actors should never sing!
You mean we’ve all forgotten “Brand New Key” by Melanie ?
Moving this to Cafe Society, to the tune of “One TIn Soldier”.
Anything at all by Mariah Carey.
“Party All The Time” by Eddie Murphy. Worst ever, bar none.
D’oh! Sorry Chaco!
Wai-wai-wai-wait… Is this, by any chance, the same Sweeny Todd portrayed in “The Demon Barber of Fleet Street”? The one who hacked people up and made them into meat pies? 'Cause if so, I SO have to hunt that song down - it sounds hilariously inane.
Jeff
And for the record, I have to cast my own vote for “Loving You”, by Minnie Ripperton. The song is bad enough, but the constant chirping of birds in the background is really what pushes that song from “horrible” to “so insanely horrible it’s funny”.
Oh, and I give an honorable mention to the Barney theme song. There’s a reason they use it to interrogate terrorists.
Jeff
It’s gettin hot in here, so take off all ur clothes