Years ago, I used to know a woman who once went to Vegas with her married boss and a friend of his. (She had recently started sleeping with the boss.) Apparently, the two guys went to Vegas a couple times a year. The friend hired an escort for the weekend, which boss-guy told the woman was the friend’s normal practice, but that he (boss-guy) never did.
My roll-eyes didn’t go over so well.
Mel I have no opinion on what your husband is or is not doing. No data. But your point that it’s only “once every six months” doesn’t mean anything.
We can’t be thinking of the same New Zealand, MelC- NZ has one of the highest rates of per capita gun ownership in the world. I don’t have the statistics in front of me, but I think there are something like 1 million guns in a country of 4 million people. Certainly, when I lived there the majority of families I knew had at least one gun in the house, even if it was Grandad’s old .303 rifle with no ammo.
On the whole “Cheating” thing, I think Tyler Turden said it best:
In short, telling this woman is only going to cause more problems than it solves.
When she finds out- as she invariably will, all you have to do is remember this:
“When in doubt, deny everything and demand proof”.
FWIW, I don’t think it’s necessarily fair to label the husband as “scum” or whatever because he’s having an affair, but my thoughts on monogamy are perhaps better suited for another thread…
I don’t think not being monogamous makes someone scum. What makes cheaters scum is that they lie about not being monogamous.
I’d be totally fine with a husband in an open relationship sleeping with someone other than his wife, as long as the wife knew it was happening, and the other person knew that he was married and in an open relationship. I personally wouldn’t want to be in a relationship like that, but I wouldn’t have a problem if someone else were. I wouldn’t call it “cheating” if someone were in an open relationship and seeing someone else. I reserve that term for situations like this, where someone (in this case, both the wife and the girlfriend) are being deceived about the nature of the relationship.
[QUOTE=Martini Enfield]
We can’t be thinking of the same New Zealand, MelC- NZ has one of the highest rates of per capita gun ownership in the world. I don’t have the statistics in front of me, but I think there are something like 1 million guns in a country of 4 million people. Certainly, when I lived there the majority of families I knew had at least one gun in the house, even if it was Grandad’s old .303 rifle with no ammo. snipQUOTE]
I have no idea what NZ you are talking about. I will look up the stats. Although I know we don’t have hand guns. You must have lived in darkest West Auckland’s low socioeconomic areas or Tokoroa or somewhere like that? NZers don’t carry guns around in cars or on their person, all guns and owners have to be registered and licenced and guns kept locked away by law.
I looked it up and yes, NZ has a high rate of gun ownership per head of population, but very low rate of gun related crime due to the strict ownership and licencing laws. Also, as already stated, we aren’t allowed to carry them around and they are rifles, not hand guns.
Then again, when you have a country of only 4million, the chances are that you have a high rate of a lot of things per head of population. Apparently very high rates of golf courses, power consumption and internet and mobile phone use per head of population.
I lived in Christchurch, FWIW, and you’d be surprised to know that handgun ownership in NZ is quite legal, provided you join an approved pistol club and jump through a huge number of hoops. It’s too much hassle for most people, but it is entirely possible to legally obtain a handgun in NZ. You still can’t carry it on your person, of course- but you can’t do that in Australia, either, so it’s no great loss.
I’m well aware of NZ’s firearms laws, though… Personally, I think they’re the perfect example of a balance between ensuring they don’t get into the wrong hands, and a commonsense realisation that most gun owners are law abiding citizens who are using their guns for hunting or sporting reasons and shouldn’t be villainised because of that.
