So I’m having lunch today alone at my favorite Mexican restaurant.
I’m sitting up at the bar, the only other person there is this other girl (about 19 - 20ish). We’re both watching the TV. The people on the TV were talking about the Somali pirates; which got us to talking.
We had been talking for a good twenty minutes or so. By this time the conversation had morphed in to college. She was telling me all about the university she goes to. I then mentioned to her about the college I went to. I also casually mentioned’; that was a good 18 years ago.
At that point she stops the conversation rather abruptly and says to me: “Wait a minute; you’re how old?” I told her “39” She then gets this look of disgust on her face and responds with “Ewe!!!” She then grabbed her plate of food and went and sat at the other end of the bar.
Now, I might get this behaviour if at some point in the conversation I was trying to be flirtatious or skeevey, but I wasn’t. Not one thing was said by either of us that could be considered “flirtatious” by any stretch of the imagination.
I’d like to pit this girl but I don’t think I can because I seriously think she might be retarded.
Maybe she sees herself as so incredibly attractive that it’s inconceivable to her that any man could engage her in conversation without having salacious motives. I’d just take it as a compliment that, from looking at you, it never even crossed her mind that you’d be so old as to be automatically repulsive.
I wonder if you she wasn’t interested in you? You say you weren’t flirting or anything of that nature, so perhaps she was the one doing the flirting (which you didn’t pick up on) and when she discovered your age she was like “ew!”
In any case, unless she’s just generally squicked out by people over 30, it seems probable that she saw the situation as having some sort of sexual overtones. She may or may not have been interested, but she was to flirt with you (in her mind) until she found out how old you were. Indeed, it’s the fact that she was willing to go along that makes me think she might have been at least a little interested.
I am 21. A lot of girls around this age have a problem with 30+ year old men. Sometimes I understand, but most of the time I think: Get over yourself, girl. Maybe she thought that you were flirty; maybe she was into you til then; no matter the reason, she was rude.
From your description of events, she completely overreacted and was very rude. But if she was there first and you took a seat nearby, that may have put the idea in her head that you had deliberately approached.
There was a chair in between us. I sat where I sat for the view of the TV. Also, that’s where the bartender sits (on the other side of the bar) when he doesn’t have shit to do. The bartender and I are friendly.
Doesn’t sound like you’re a dirty ‘old ‘ man to me SHAKES.
She was rude. Plain and simple. Sounds like she was hitting on YOU.
I’m 48. My younger nieces and nephews see me as the cool uncle. I see them as people. They are adults in there 20’s and 30’s. I enjoy talking to them. I am still surprised when they call me ‘Uncle’.
Simple pre-conceived notions happen a lot when you (collective you) are younger. When any of us get over that stuff, and grow up, it’s very easy to just talk to a person one on one. That is the best thing about growing ‘old’.
(My 48 year old Wife finished a 140.6 IRONMAN last year. Growing old is not what some people think it is).
I agree with the others that she thought you were hitting on her. Some people’s perceptions of flirting really are out of whack and they think everyone of the opposite sex who treats them nicely is trying to flirt.
Another factor is that girls that age get a LOT of attention from older guys who are trying to hit on them, so it frequently is true that guys in your age group who are “nice” to girls that age are doing it for flirting purposes. Many of the young girls consider it gross because they feel like the older guys are trying to take advantage of them.
It was very rude and immature of her to react that way, of course. Even if you had been trying to flirt, it’s not like that is a crime and she could have been polite in making it clear she wasn’t interested. But, hey, immaturity is the nature of being that age!
She was, you got it in one. For an over the top reaction like that to your age after having a general discussion about current events there are are definitely a few screws loose. .
