Yay! I have my own sub. ::tear:: Gosh, never thought it would happen to me...

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

So, I posted a threada while ago about the new woman I started dating. I will call her O*.

Short recap. She is all kinds of hot, sweet and a submissive. We have been seeing each other almost every day. We did Thanksgiving, with my family, at her house. We did Christmas at my parents. We are getting on perfectly. The whole Dom/sub thing is new to me but it is working wonderfully for both of us. (Note, for those who don’t do the whole Dom/sub thing, it is more than just sex. It is way more complex than you’d think)

She is moving in. Yay!

We started moving her stuff in last week. She should be fully moved in by the end of the month. Things are going to be interesting for a little while, her dogs and my cats are going to have to figure out the whole thing.

We’ve spent tons of time together and it is way cool, and totally different, to come home and have O* there. She really likes taking care of me and having everything ready when I get home**. It is odd but very cool to come home and have her waiting with dinner almost ready, the shower waiting for me along with my clothes laid out. Whatever chores she had get are almost always done. Basically, when I come home she has everything taken care of.

Of course, I do (and will be doing) lots of stuff around the house. The yard, building things, etc. But she thrives on taking care of the house and making sure everything is the way I like it.

At the same time, this is a two sided relationship so there are a lot of things on my end that I take care of. Basically she takes care of me and running the house, I take care of everything else. And I also take care of her. That is much more work than you’d think. I am not the best at reading peoples moods, but with her I spend a lot of time working to make sure that she is getting everything that she needs. Most of the time all she needs is my love but sometimes she needs more. I won’t go into details, but she needs to be kept in line***.

This is by far the oddest relationship I have been in. At the same time it is the most fulfilling. Being the one in charge, the one who handles the problems and the one who takes care of her is a lot of work but I absolutely love doing it.

Reading through this before posting, it sounds really freaking odd. And I haven’t even gotten to the sex yet :slight_smile: Yet, it is what we both want and I love the woman.

It may get more interesting as well. She has brought up the idea of another woman. We will see about that one. Theoretically, I am all for it. Yet I want to make sure that our relationship is solid before we start doing anything that might affect it. We’ll see.

Slee

  • Yeah, go ahead, make the Story of O joke. Ya know you want to.

** Before anyone starts in with the ‘You are a creep, how dare you expect a woman to…’ bit, she wants this.

*** She wants this as well. We are safe about it. Figuring out when she needs it and when she doesn’t takes up a lot of my time.

2

I’m glad you and she are happy but you’re right…that whole situation is indeed very odd to me. There’s no way I could do it. I just don’t want a woman doing a lot of stuff for me that I can do for myself (other than the submissive sex, that is!).
:slight_smile:

3

I like how a relationship that would have been considered completely normal for 99% of history and today in most of the rest of the world is now suddenly considered a super kinky fetish.

4

Now I’m picturing Enoch with Holly bound with vines in a cave.

5

Congrats.

6

Maybe within the scope of the Bible or something.

7

Darn it, I was hoping for a story of a personal submersible…

8

So was I. I was hoping this was going to be the precursor to the sub version of The Horror of Blimps.

Oh well,
I’m happy for you Slee. That kind of relationship would never work for me but I can totally understand how it can work for other people. I think it’s wise to wait before introducing a third person, especially since the Dom/Sub thing is still new to you.

9

And now I want a sandwich.

Congrats sleestak, it sounds like you both are very happy :slight_smile:

10

I’ve played with subs before, and while it’s all in good fun I could never do a 24/7 relationship. It really is a lot of work and it has to be something you’re really into.

As an aside, I’ve had subs talk about their “sub space” and I always think of Star Trek.

11

Thirded.

The OP being in a happy relationship is nice, too. But not as nice as having a submarine.

12

Yeah

13

I wish it was as well, then I could understand it better. This sub just sounds freaky.

…also, I know they have ultralight aircraft kits. Is there a submersible version of the same?

14

Congrats. Don’t forget to sort out your safe words, etc.

15

I’m really happy to hear this is working out for you, Slee. I remember reading your posts about this a few months back.

Remember that communication is the touchstone of any healthy relationship, kinky or otherwise. A good Dom asks questions and keeps on top of what his sub wants and needs, even when the sub may not necessarily be communicating those needs obviously. Sounds like you’re off to a great start, though.

16

that lifestyle/lovestyle is highly customizable. all the participants have to make your own way and rules/procedures/policies. that said there are principles and methods that people have used successfully before. your being new to it, so you could do some reading or discussion of others who have done it and their methods.

going slow is important. lots of communication is important. lay out your current desires to each other. discuss rules/procedures/policies with each other. be open to periodic discussion of rules/procedures/policies and how they might change if desired.

both of you enjoy your lifestyle/lovestyle.

17

Sixthed. I was going to ask where he got it and if they had any more.

18

LOL. I never thought of it that way. Grandma was a sub! :eek:

19

Despite the fevered dreams of many straight man that have led to chapped palms, I somewhat doubt the majority of women the world over and in generations past in this country were sitting at home, anxiously awaiting their husbands coming back and giving them erotic spankings. Some Dom/sub relationships might involve household roles as Slee’s does, but there’s far more to D/s than chores and maintaining your preferred roles. For one thing, the roles are decided by desire rather than gender.

20

Good for you Slee.

I remember once, I dated a Muslim woman. Back when we were still getting to know each other, she wanted to come over to cook me and my room mate breakfast.

Not only did she come over and cook us breakfast but while me and my friend were stuffing our gullets; she cleaned and washed all the dishes. She then proceeded to sweep and mop the kitchen floor despite my protest.

So, yeah, I know that guilt/weird feeling your talking about.