There is nothing unusual about this situation, except maybe how unusually stubbornly you’ve refused to see his true character when he’s been showing it to you for so long.
Get out. Get help. Go home if you can. Contact a woman’s shelter if you can’t.
I think a bunch of us did.
I think it’s very brave of you to join a brand-new message board solely to share your tale of romantic woe with 1000’s of random strangers.
I laughed hard enought to attract attention to the fact I’m reading the Dope instead of working, thanks.
I agree with your assessment of the situation, and could not add anothing at all to the esteemed and intelligent words that my dear Cazzle has posted.
Well, I can, just to add that clearly, this is all her fault for not loving him enough and loving the Tim Tams more.
Get the FUCK outta Dodge and leave this assclown. Get some therapy and grow and find a hobby or three.
I’m going to move this to IMHO, where I’m sure more excellent advice will be available, should the OP ever return, unlikely though that is.
twickster, MPSIMS moderator
Do you have family or friends back in Illinois, or somewhere else? Do you have a religious leader, former teacher, boss, doctor, or anyone else AT ALL that you could reach out to? If so, then reach out. You don’t even have to tell them what’s going on at first, you can start with just saying hi. Or you can use the internet- look for social workers, psychologists, clergy people, free clinics, Family Services, support groups, or shelters. There are people who will help you, there are people who spend their lives helping people like you. One of the classic signs of an abusive relationship is that the abuser slowly isolates their partner, getting rid of any support system he or she had. They even undermine your sense of self- an abuser will make you feel like there’s something wrong with you, when really they are the really screwed up one. One way or another, he has convinced you that you are alone without him. But that’s not true. Find somebody who you can talk to, someone your boyfriend doesn’t know. Remind yourself that you have an identity outside of him. You were a complete person before you met him, and you can be an even better person after him. There just has to be an ‘after him.’
I once posted about a relationship that, in retrospect, sounded a lot like yours. People here told me to dump him, to just get out of it. I thought it was harsh, and that they didn’t really understand the situation. But sometimes you need someone on the outside to tell it like it is. So we’re telling you- this is not OK. You don’t deserve this. And you are not alone.
Best Advice Possible (cited from Google)
Flights from Los Angeles, CA (LAX) to Chicago, IL (ORD)
Non-stop flights: 15–16 per day, 3h 54m duration
Airlines: United, Virgin America, Spirit
Schedule of non-stop flightsValid through Aug 14
6:00 am → 11:56 am LAX-ORD S - - - - - - United 557
6:00 am → 11:56 am LAX-ORD - M T W T F S United 590
6:45 am → 12:41 pm LAX-ORD S M T W T F S United 944
7:41 am → 1:37 pm LAX-ORD - M T W T F - United 686
7:45 am → 1:47 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 736
7:52 am → 1:45 pm LAX-ORD S - - - - - - United 499
9:05 am → 3:09 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 658
9:10 am → 3:12 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - F - United 509
9:15 am → 3:15 pm LAX-ORD S - - - - - - United 690
9:20 am → 3:22 pm LAX-ORD - M T W - - - United 382
9:20 am → 3:22 pm LAX-ORD - - - - T - - United 859
11:00 am → 5:01 pm LAX-ORD S M T W T F S United 942
12:05 pm → 6:07 pm LAX-ORD S M T W T F - United 840
12:05 pm → 6:10 pm LAX-ORD S M T W T F S Virgin America 810
12:16 pm → 6:17 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 840
12:55 pm → 6:55 pm LAX-ORD S - - - - - - United 222
1:00 pm → 7:00 pm LAX-ORD - M T W T F - United 830
1:05 pm → 7:07 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 594
1:50 pm → 7:47 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 843
2:02 pm → 8:09 pm LAX-ORD S M T W T F - United 843
5:08 pm → 10:59 pm LAX-ORD - - - - - F - United 438
5:19 pm → 11:10 pm LAX-ORD - M T W T - - United 438
5:53 pm → 11:49 pm LAX-ORD S - - - - - - United 438
5:55 pm → 11:45 pm LAX-ORD S M T W T F S Virgin America 816
6:30 pm → 12:18 am LAX-ORD - M T W T F - United 408
6:52 pm → 12:46 am LAX-ORD S - - - - - - United 408
6:57 pm → 12:45 am LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 815
11:00 pm → 4:53 am LAX-ORD - M T W T F - United 664
11:04 pm → 4:57 am LAX-ORD S - - - - - S United 319
11:12 pm → 5:08 am LAX-ORD S - - - - - S United 664
11:15 pm → 5:11 am LAX-ORD - - - - - - S United 223
11:32 pm → 5:20 am LAX-ORD S M T W T - - United 498
11:38 pm → 5:26 am LAX-ORD - - - - - F - United 414
11:59 pm → 5:49 am LAX-ORD S M T W T F S Spirit 732
All flights from Los Angeles - All flights to Chicago