5 weeks before im due to deliver our first son,
i get a calm after dinner slap upside the head with my live in boyfriend of 2 yrs.
yes, im whining, yes im bitching, but i’ve passed the sad, poor me, why why why bullshit and have lunged into sheer hatred for how pathetic this human being behaves.
“i’ve been thinking about this for almost a week, and i didn’t want to mention it in case i changed my mind… but I think we can live together the way we have been, getting along wonderfully, having fun, and still raise the kids (we have a 3.5 yr old as well) while i go out and have a seperate life” and went on as if nothing had ever happened - yesterday he loved me and was excited, singing about the baby, talking about buying a house - then poof - its all gone… where the fuck did it go??? cause i didnt see it run past me!
oh really? Wow, and you gave it a whole weeks consideration!
ok - i’ve tried, lost 11 lbs stressing myself to death after finding out it was all because of a girl he met 3 weeks prior @ his new job at National Spies Anonymous. Collapsed then went into labor 3 times @ the hospital, and stuffed thru a psyhiatric evaluation due to my inability to stop crying like a dumb bitch. But ive volunteered for counseling, wee, and the emotional psychosis has simmered down and gone into a cave. For now.
He leaves for all night outings with her, and doses himself in cologne that i bought him prior to leaving (which i have since found and thrown away) then lets our 3.5 yr old answer the phone when she calls, so he can tell her who it is. Has gone $400 in the hole writing bad checks for cash to take her out, leaving the rent unpaid. Rubbing it all in my face. I dont bitch i dont nag, i ask that he just keep it out of my face, to have the phonecalls when hes not home, to leave after our daughter goes to bed.
He’s begun to treat our daughter like she is some by product of me that he needs no part in, and seems to think im simply the carrier pod for his baby. I have the option to move out of state to have the baby (to a place that makes me physically ill to be in), but this would deprive him of his chance to “be a good father to his son” even though he’s incapable of being human to myself and our daughter, other than asking that i stay living here while he pays rent in exchange for child support. Am i supposed to keep considering his needs and wants??? Everyone says not to, but good god! Id hate to be the bitch who took the mans baby away before he could meet him, but it’s either live in hell or move and live in hell without the additional hell he provides
I spent all day moving all his furniture into his new room, and mine into my new room, after i lived on the couch for 3 weeks, (I just wanted my own damn space to hide in, so he gave me his room and took the babys old room) while he took a nap and then woke up to watch me do it, while he played his Xbox.
Do many men go absolutely crazy with stress & blow everything they have to hell, when they have everything going for them?
Hell, who cares, hopefully the girl is worth the trade he made.
Well, apparently she is - and im sure she’ll be more worth it when he sees his sons csection birth and realizes he’s just butt outta luck in terms of ever having that childs respect as a man.
Thanks & Sorry - just wanted to gripe for once.
Call me names, i dont care - whore, bitter, stupid, etc.
ive heard it all already because i allowed myself to cry once in front of him, over a situation that shouldn’t be any big deal -
I just felt like venting.