Given that this is the Pit, I feel entirely justified in informing everybody that Scylla ripped off a lot of that (including the title) from “Fight Club”.
Hmmm…Scylla, let me know if you don’t remember posting that.
Just the title is unoriginal, I think.
So the Prozac is not really having the desired effect…
Oh yeah?
Well… you suck!
I say that for optimists everywhere.
Oh, and a dubious statistic: Optimists live longer than pessimists
As in:
You are not admired, popular, or liked. You are at best tolerated–most days, mocked.
Your “People Of The Straight Dope” image file has been downloaded and altered in ways you can’t even imagine. It has been forwarded one-by-one to 75% of the other posters, who together conspire in silence not to tell you how nearly they’ve soiled themselves over its hilarity.
For every poster than applauds you, 8 more are rolling their eyes. They see right through you. Your insouciance, your self-deprecating humor, are all seen for what they are: desperate quaverings for recognition and approval. Your anecdotes are not amusing. The quips that you carefully craft for effect are clumsy and transparent. Your exaggerated sense of outrage at others’ offensive posts is obviously–to everyone–a bid for attention, a pathetic attempt to bring attention back to yourself, so you can be the little turd around which the world revolves.
No one cares what your favorite candy is. No one cares which Beatle you thought was cuter. No one cares what you were doing when the Challenger exploded, when Jerry Garcia died, when Dallas revealed that Kristen shot JR.
There are posters who search on your name on a quest to see what new lows the human intellect can reach.
People mock your comma errors and spelling gaffes.
At least two people each week petition the moderators to get you banned. Other Dopers in your area have held off holding a Dopefest solely because they can’t bear that you might show up.
No one is laughing. Except at you.
I thought you should know, that made me laugh. Probably because I can actually see you in my mind and you are traipsing on said cloud. 
This really pisses me off. No, I wasn’t drunk.
I don’t appreciate the accusation of plagiarism. Either make it stick, or apologize.
Post word for word where you think I stole it from.
That’s evil
And I see myself in there.
I’m gonna go feel bad for a while.
k, I’m done…
From Fight Club:
You may be curious to know that the phrase “You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake,” is not orignal from that movie either.
Anybody else think I perpetrated a ripoff?
HEY just kiddin, man, relaOWHEYFUCKKNOCKITOFFIGOTASTHMAY’KNOW
You’re no daisy, either.
Hey, even paranoids have enemies.
but I feel all flowery though
FWIW, I got the phrase “traipsing through life on a cloud of lavender fairy dust” from somewhere else too. Nothing is new under the sun, as the Roman poet Terence once said…
“How could anyone ever tell you
You were anything less than beautiful?
How could anyone ever tell you
You were less than whole?
How could anyone fail to notice
The miracle of your loving,
How deeply you’re connected to my soul?”
:wally
{{{{{{Scylla}}}}}}
Hang in there, kid 
Thanks Matt:
Being accused of plagiarism really pisses me off. I wrote that post, typos and all, and I didn’t rip anybody off doing it.
(and all you people out there thought I was kidding about everybody being out to get me. Watch yourself or they’ll get you too. There are sharks in the water, bears in the wood, pimps after my daughter, and boyz n the hood. They’ll bring you down, turn you around, stole what you found, and hide underground. Hey Matt, what you’d put in this fairy dust? I kind of like it.)
Am too!
Snowflakes are not all unique, but all of them are beautiful and so am I. I am not better than others, but being equal to them alone is enough to make me special. By doing something to make lives even a little better for others, even to one person for a short time gives me inherent worth. I am not be the smartest, most interesting person; nor am I the most creative or useful. It’s sad we live in a society where one has to be one of these things to be worthy… the people who are the most creative and intelligent are not better or worthier than me, either.
I reckon that I came from ashes and to ashes will return, and soon. But why not enjoy the sun while it shines and not worry what will happens in ten billion years? I may have been dying since I was born, but I was born. I’m thankful every day that I was born, but not to God. I reckon there is no higher being preoccupied with me. Why should this make me enjoy life less? I’ll settle for ambivelance, it beats the heck out of malevolence, even if life is unfair.
My body and mind will provide me with years of service before losing function to decay and disease. Years ago, the amount of time between birth and death was shorter. Now, I will likely live long enough that I can fall victim to chronic disease and not the acute kind. I can build shelter with my hands and protect myself from many of the things that would like to eat me. Many of the bacteria help me rather than hinder.
Lots of people want my stuff, it is human nature to want what you see others enjoying. It is human nature to get more stuff than you need, even though you know you don’t need so much stuff. There are limits to how badly someone wants MY dirty underwear. If it disappears, maybe I didn’t need it so badly and life will go on. I will have both fond and disturbing memories of my wife and kids and will seek to try and emphasize the former.
Trust no one! Trust a peer. Be tougher! Fall in love and be vulnerable. Because my life is not exceptional, this gives me the freedom to follow my will, as best I can. To make things work for myself and my family. To place my priorities on the stuff that matters and not get hung up on the horrors of old age and the vanity of hoping my name will be whispered through the ages. It won’t and I’m better off for it. Being makes me special, I beat out 300 million othe sperm to get here and will enjoy the ride while it lasts. And when it finishes, I will get off the rioller coaster without complaint – all the warnings and cautions were posted at the entrance. And its been fun.
Umm…
You have no chance to survive make your time
<ducking and running>
I had to return and reread this once more. And, again, commendations to Scylla. This is one of the best things I’ve ever read.