I could have sworn there was once a thread where folks took turns writing sentences that had (almost certainly) never been typed before in human history. I can’t find it, but it’s time for one now in any case.
Whenever Mr. Aardvark filed his tax returns and that day fell on a Tuesday, he always made it a point to lick the postage stamp an even number of licks somewhere between one hundred thirty eight and three hundred fourteen times.
Years ago, when this scene was repeated, I could have told them all to eat a book, but now, things were different and green all over: my sandwich was no longer tasty.
This morning I fell out of bed but I never hit the floor – I’m floating eighteen inches in the air.
On alternate Thursdays I’ve been typing with my hands crossed, which is especially difficult with the keys I hit with my elbows.
A million million cats walking across a million million keyboards would eventually write the complete works of James Joyce in the original Klingon.
In a speckled avocado she waits, convulsing.
The corpulent Zimbabwean curler swallowed the pilsner with a feistiness heretofore unseen by anyone in human history.
I would so read a book that had all these lines. Lemme give it a go-They tried to change the color of his knees, but went past the expiration date.
That gave me an idea: I took all the above sentences, threw them at NovelAI’s latest engine, Euterpe V2, and it spat out this as its next sentence, which I think qualifies for this thread, or so Google says.
It takes a lot of courage to turn down a job offer from God.
As he gazed upon her beauty, the perfect moment was ruined as his seeing-parts fell out.
Kaylasdad99 aspires to do one hundred sit-ups during his lifetime.
I had just acquired the most ridiculous and useless super-power you could possibly have – super-olfaction – when my Golden Retriever padded into the room, looked me square in the eye and, in perfect English, said, “Knock it off, I’m the one with the fabulous sniffer, putz!”
There was asparagus on the balcony, then, and asparagus on the veranda as well.
[Also: Kaylasdad99 aspires to do 99 sit-ups during his lifetime.]
I’d like a Big Mac with no cheese, a regular fries and a large Sprite, unless you’ve got hasenpfeffer on the menu, in which case I’ll have two orders of that both with Spirit Monkey cashews on the side and a dry red shiraz.
This sainted isle, this nomadic titwillow of a demagogue, this chainsmoking paradigm for wrestling iquanas: this Indiana.
This sainted isle, this nomadic titwillow of a demagogue, this chainsmoking paradigm for wrestling iquanas: this Indiana.
EDIT: damn, got ninja’ed by a mere 15 hours; I was so waiting to post this, but great minds and all.
Cardigan is a manque plagiarist, a revolving pedant, and a be-sweatered miracle of perspicacity.
“Boogers for breakfast again, Jeeves,” ordered King Randykins VI.
“That’s the last time I try fucking an electrical socket” I said to myself, knowing full well that it was a lie.