…the utters on a cow. They hang down or off to the sides."
This is what my husband told me last night.
We were talking and I asked him why he didn’t pay attention to my breasts and liked me to keep my bra or blouse on when we had sex. I realize that it’s the truth, but five pregnancies will do that to you. It hurt my feelings quite a bit.
Some time after that he told me he wanted to have sex, but I said no. I also have thighs that look like tree trunks and a butt that’s about the size of a tire, I don’t need to be told that, I already know.
I don’t really want my husband to see me naked anymore.
He must really, really, really want to be celibate. You’re a mother. Mothers are beautiful. Tell him he can watch the five kids while you go off to a spa for a month (which he can pay for too).
PS: You could tell him his schlong looks like a groty peanut. “And you call those balls? I call 'em grapes. And I don’t like grapes.”
(Sorry to be poking fun at the situation, dragongirl…)
Yow- That was a serious case of bad planning on your husbands part seeing as how you own a large portion of the nookie equipment. I, too, would have a bad reaction to such a statement. It’s bad enough that women have nearly impossible cultural physical standards to strive for, that having someone love tell you that you don’t measure up to some perceived ideal has got to be pretty rough.
I’m an OB-GYN nurse and have been for 12+ years. I have seen literally thousands of women’s bodies. I think we come in a very cool variety of shapes and sizes and not one of them is ‘bad’. And I have seen it all!
You are probably going to have to find a way to forgive him his horrible lack of tact. For example, ask yourself, “Is he always that stupid?” and take some comfort in the fact that he is…
I think your breasts are specatcular! Hey You have 5 kids, if they aren’t on the floor I am impressed. My sister has two and hers practically touch her knees somedays( I think they shrink in the cold) That was not a very nice thing for him to say. So If it makes you feel better, I can admire your breasts for you.
I feel for you. Mine aren’t exactly where I want mine to be either.
Just for clarification, I only have two kids, but five pregnancies. Two were stillborn and another was miscarried.
He says shit like this way too much. He has an unrealistic view of what a marriage is and what women should be. This has been going on for years. I’ve been close to tears all morning.
How incredibly mean of him! And besides, who is he looking at naked to compare you to? Perky only lasts so long in real life. Yep, those young giggly hardbodies he sees in ads and on TV *would never * have put up with him through 5 pregnancies. He should thank his lucky stars that through your love for him you allowed your body to be changed over and again through the miracle of childbirth.
You are beautiful and wonderful; he’s an idiot. He should worship you. “Utters”? Meh. Too bad he’s not hung like a bull.
Well, the next time he utters a word about your udders, start watching “The Lorena Bobbitt Story” on TV (the tape is available at most video stores). That should give him the idea that he is about to lose more than just his nookie privileges! :eek:
never had children myself, but I can imagine how tough miscarriages must have been for you…perhaps both of you.
he is an utter arse.
If it’s been going on for a number of years, he needs help. It sounds like he is a bully. Even giving him the benefit of the doubt that he may have taken what you’ve been through quite hard and it’s left him with his own set of issues ontop of whatelse might’ve been lurking there, even so…I don’t think his behaviour is at all justified. If you possibly can, see if you can get some support so that you can either deal with his crap, or, take steps to getting out of the situation entirely.
What the OP’s husband said can easily be rated somewhere between tactless and cruel.
That said, I think it is slightly mitigated by the fact that he was asked the question. Was there any way for him to respond truthfully that would have spared the OP’s feelings? I’ve been trying to think of something for the past few minutes and I’m coming up blank.
Oddly enough, I was going to ask the same thing until I realized that the answer is that the truth would have hurt no matter what but it could have been mitigated by breaking it to her in a less cruel way. This is a serious marital issue that needed to be discussed so I don’t blame dragongirl for asking the hard question.
