My Grandmother had several dozen pieces of Mary Gregory glassware, a collection she was quite proud of.
When she died, the pieces were more or less equally divided between MammaHomie, AuntHomie, my brother, my cousin, and myself.
My pieces are sitting on a shelf collecting dust and I want to get rid of them. I’ve offered them to the other recipients, but nobody has room. I suggested donating mine to a museum, but my cousin had a fit, insisting that they belong “in the family.” When I broached the idea of selling them, my mother went into convulsions.
Apparently I’ve become the unwitting curator of fragile antiques that no one wants, but no one wants me to get rid of, either.
What do you suggest I do? From where I sit, my options appear to be:
Sell them on ebay and live with the consequences.
Donate them to a museum and live with the consequences.
Continue to care for them out of my duty to my grandmother’s memory.
I would donate. You could let the public enjoy them and that way if your family members ever what to know where the pieces are, you can tell them to take a trip to the museum.
Seriously though, they’re trying to tell you to keep them but they won’t take them when you don’t want them? That’s weird.
Either wrap them up nicely, put them in a box and store them somewhere out of the way, OR wrap them up nicely, put them in a box, and next time your at your moms house, just leave them there. That’s what I would do. I would either try to leave them without her noticing and then call the next day to tell her and say “I don’t want them anymore and since you don’t want me to get rid of them YOU can store them” or I would just bring them over one day and say that. Preferably on a day you’ve been invited over for something unrelated. This way, once they’re at someone else’s house they know they have to keep them. Especially if you tell them that you’ll throw them out* since you don’t want them and neither does anyone else.
*Substitute throw away with whatever you plan to do to get rid of them.
They don’t want them, but they won’t let you do anything with them? My initial reaction was to say, “Sell them.” But I like like **Joey P’s **suggestion: wrap 'em and take 'em to Mom’s house. If she is unable/unwilling to store them, then she can hardly blame you for being unable/unwilling to store them.
I am not familiar with this glass or its value, but is there a museum that would want it on a long-term loan basis? You could get it back if the shit hits the fan, but it would be out of your house.
Thirded. I recently donated a painting by my Grandpa to the museum but it was with the blessing of my family. Anything I didn’t want would get returned to them to handle.
Well, they’re yours. You can do what you like. You can offer to sell them to other family members for those that want to keep the collection together…or sell them on e-bay.
Overall I think it’s an existentialist exercise. Do you own your stuff or does your stuff own you?
Give your family members a deadline to claim them. Either they want to take them or you will get rid of them. If it’s important to them, they can take them. Make it clear that if you sell them they share part of the responsibility for giving their right of refusal. Say that refusal to take them is permission for you to do with them what you will.
You could do that, but I think it might get messy. That’s the kind of thing that family resentment gets started over. When someone says something doesn’t matter, but it does and it’ll bug them for years, and then they’ll turn the others against you, but no one will tell you, they’ll just stew over it. I still think you’re best off giving them to mom (or anyone that throws a fit) and saying “Here, you want them, you keep them”
That could work too, then, someday, years down the road when someone asks about them, tell them what you did. As soon as someone pipes up about it you can say “Hey, I offered them to you, you didn’t want them”
Tell your mom and your cousin – again, perhaps with more emphasis – that you DO NOT WANT THEM and that you are GETTING RID OF THEM. Present this not as a question but as a statement – you are informing, not asking for permission. If they want them, fine, give them to them. If they don’t want them, sell 'em.
It looks like your portion of the collection might be worth $ 500 - $2000 or so. Not a huge sum, but it’s good chunk of change. Pack them securely, and store them in a solid (not cardboard) box or trunk, and later on give them to your kids or SO.
Not to be sexist, but women (even younger ones) tend to like and value fine decorative items such as collectible glassware more than men. You might make some future wife/wives and daughters quite happy with your portion of the collection. I vote for holding your nose and hanging onto it.
They are yours to do with as you like, and selling or giving them away is entirely your decision and your right. Unfortunately, as soon as you make that decision and exercise that right your family is going to completely freak out on you, and it won’t matter that you’re right and they’re wrong. You’ve already seen the tip of that iceberg. You have to decide whether the extra space in your household is worth enduring casual, icy comments to no-one-in-particular at each and every Thanksgiving for the next 50 years or so. For me, no way. I say pack them securely and try very hard to outlive the rest of your family. After that, sell them and take one of those moon vacation they’re been promising us since the 70’s.
Astro’s idea is a good one - it seems nice to keep them in your family, and caring for them can mean storing them out of sight rather than displaying them, dusting them etc!
It’s a fair assumption that a dependent of yours would be pleased to receive them, just for the meaning and history behind it. But that’s the sentimental arse showing again, sorry!
