He would have to be really sick, or having a procedure that required a driver. Does she actually go in the examining room with him? Like a mom does until the kid tells her it’s time for her to stop?
No, he doesn’t go with me unless there’s some fairly serious issue with me going alone, like anesthesia, a non-functional limb, or severe bleeding. Of course, I usually go to the clinic where he works so he tends to pop in and see how things are going, even on fairly piffling little things. He doesn’t typically go to the doctor when he’s sick, and he’s far less prone to injury than I am, so I don’t think I’ve ever been to the doctor with him.
He sees a fair few patients who bring their spouses into the exam room with them, though.
Look here . . . kid . . . I’m in my 60s, and I can’t think of a circumstance where I’d need my partner to accompany me or stay home with me, unless I were on death’s door. The only exception would be procedures where they don’t allow you to drive home (even then, I’d probably sneak out and make a fast getaway).
Same goes for my partner (except he’s in his 40s).
Put another check mark in the “nope, not for routine stuff” column. I don’t think either of us has been so sick that we couldn’t look after ourselves at home, either - I’d stay home and help him if he was completely incapacitated, but for a cold? Not so much. I had the influenza before I met him; when I was sick with that, I could have used someone at home with me - I think I spent three days on the couch without moving - I don’t remember them well. 
I do go to **first **visits with my husband because he has a strong phobia about paperwork: it’s pretty much my only exclusive responsibility in the relationship. But I’ve never actually gone into the doctor’s office with him–after I’ve filled out the forms, I typically wait in the waiting room and read a book.
I noticed this same thing when I was a kid. My mom went back to work full time when I was in the third grade, and I never, ever remembered her staying home with me if I was sick, but many of my friends’ moms would stay home if they had even a cold. At the time, I thought it sounded like a drag–as one of six kids, staying home from school sick was literally the ONLY time I ever got the house to myself, and I wouldn’t have wanted my mom there to ruin it!
I go with my husband if it’s something new or big because he’s both deaf and shy, so he won’t say that he can’t understand what the dr is saying and comes home with a whole headful of garbled non-information.
He got a new hearing aid recently that seems to work well so I wonder if he’ll want me there any more… However, the shyness isn’t cured so he wouldn’t actually ask any questions. Sigh.
However, if it meant taking time off work then probably it would have to be pretty big for me to take time off. If he is home sick he wants to be left alone so I’d work. But as the downstairs is our school I can pop in and see him between classes.
No current SO, but for me it’s a matter of what does constitute “routine” for that person.
I’ve gone to the doctor with relatives, roomies and a landlady for routine checks when there was reason to believe they wouldn’t be able to drive/might be faint (friends who drop like sacks of potatoes any time they get blood extracted) or when I had information which I wanted to be sure the doctor got (my landlady who was getting the same medications in triplicate, as three different doctors were treating her for everything, unaware that so were her other doctors - they were all aware that she did see two other doctors regularly) or which I want to be sure I got (how to deal with a chronic condition I wasn’t familiar with).
*One *of them is really controlling - I’m just not sure which one it is.
What Ferret Herder said about the 'flu. I not only took him but I shuffled along with him for the 20 min it took to take a five min walk from the parking lot to the office (the office is in a multi-level centre.) I also went into the exam room with him, because he really wasn’t making all that much sense and wouldn’t have remembered a thing. It’s the sickest I’ve ever seen him outside of sick enough to go to the ER.
That’s the only time I’ve ever taken off work to take him to the doctor, gone into the room with him for the consultation, etc. I’ve taken him to procedures (he had an endoscopy and was sedated) and of course, I was there at the hospital when he had his gall bladder out - and good thing, too, because he reacted to the anesthesia and nearly died - but I can’t fathom taking him to every day stuff or even to “I’m mildly ill” stuff.
Bear in mind, he doesn’t drive though - if he’s too sick to take public transport I pretty well have to take him. But that’s been once in seven years as above, and a few times to the ER for food poisoning and gall bladder stuff, and the ER is different, IMO.
My grandparents schedule checkups and go to appointments together and most of the time my dad will go with them if he can, but then, they are 81 years old and are in the early stages of Alzheimer’s so I think in their case it is warranted. Also, my grandma would have to be bleeding profusely and only able to crawl before she would actually admit to a doctor that something was wrong. :rolleyes:
No. I can imagine some situations where I might do, like the ones mentioned in this thread, but then I’d expect the appointment to be after my work time unless that were absolutely impossible.
This is not a good reason:
‘It’s your job as a wife’ is not a good reason for anything, really.
However, I have to applaud your colleague’s creativity in thinking of ways to get extra time off work.
I’d go for routine visits if my SO wanted the company and I had the free time, but I wouldn’t expect to go, and wouldn’t change my schedule or call in to work for it.
If my SO was home sick with something mild-to-moderate, I wouldn’t call in, but I do think I would alter my schedule in other ways; coming home for lunch, dropping in between school and work instead of going straight there, maybe postponing minor chores/activities like getting a hair cut. It’s fun to pamper a sick SO, and earns you some brownie points for the next time I’m sick and crabby and really wish someone would bring me ginger ale.
It wasn’t really meant to encompass everyone in a generation, her statement about “My husband feels it’s my job as his wife to take care of him when he’s sick” strikes me as a pretty baby-boomer relationship dynamic for some reason. Like when he plops down on the couch she’s supposed to be there at the coffee table popping a beer for him and rubbing his feet. Something tells me your relationship dynamic is nowhere near that though 
My mother wishes she’d gone with my father more often before his condition became so much worse. We have both come to the conclusion that he was minimizing symptom reporting to his doctor, and editing what he got from the doctor to tell us. Going with him became the only way to be sure we were getting accurate reports going in both directions.
Well you are absolutely wrong in your stereotype of the baby boomer generation.
I would feel like a big baby if my wife came with me on every doctor’s visit. I went with my wife during her OB check-ups and when she had to be sedated for a couple of procedures, but other than that she goes by herself as well. One of us would have to be seriously ill for the other to stay home with them.
We go to doctor visits solo, unless a driver will be needed. When ill at home, I prefer solitude. If I asked my SO to stay home due to an illness, she’d likely alert next of kin and get out my will. 
Well, my situation is a little different than the usual.
Since my dear bride has suffered from various side-effects of the continuous chemotherapy that she takes for her CML, there are no ‘routine’ doctors visits for her.
So, I go with her whenever I can.
She is unable to drive herself since fracturing her L3 back in August, so it isn’t really an optional kind of thing.
However, before she became chronically ill, I never went to the doctor with her nor she with me. Hospital stays are a different thing entirely.
I’m lucky to be able to work quite flexibly, so if my husband is extremely unwell (ie flu rather than a bad cold), then I will work from home so that I can ensure he’s getting plenty of fluids, taking his meds, etc.
But there’s no way either of us would accompany the other to a routine doctor’s appointment. That’s just wierd.
Two questions come to mind:
- What kind of leave is she using in these circumstances?
- Does he take the equivalent time of his work for her?
I always go with my wife when she needs to see the doctor. This is per her request and I don’t really mind. English is not her first language and while she is coversationally fluent and adept enough to pick up and understand 80-90% of what the nurse/doctor might say, she is afraid she will miss or not understand some technical detail or explanation. So I go to make sure she understands everything.
Me? Nah, I can take care of myself.