[spoiler]Jack whizzes on the railroad tracks. And whizzes. And whizzes. And whizzes. And whizzes. And whizzes.
7:08AM: Jack stops in his tracks, looks back at Tony. “Damn, was that a 7-11 I saw back there? I need a beef jerky and a slushy.”
7:26AM: Jack pays for his beef jerky, slushy, ding dongs, peanuts, and Hustler magazine. He then drops to the floor and dies. “Damn”, he says, in his last breath. “I’ve been bleeding to death from that hand wound from 40 minutes ago. Oh yeah, and that self-inflicted gut wound from FREAKIN’ LATE FEBRUARY!”
7:31AM: Buster tries to give Jack a shoulder massage. Ukulele music ends.
Okay, I think the writers almost redeemed themselves for the rest of this season but they still didn’t answer the one question that I know is on everyone’s mind…okay, maybe just mine:
Maybe Jack’s heading back down to the Salazar ranch. Pick up the pieces and start up his own drug empire. Find himself another Mexican babe. Maybe CLOWdia had a sister.
Curtis is going to be kicking himself in few minutes, now that the action has died down. “Crap! I promised that kid we’d follow them and keep him safe!”
And I wonder if the Chinese security guy is really going to let Agent Ratfink go? If so, I have a feeling he won’t be winning the CTU Employee of the Year award.
OK, so Jack is back for next season. Still, how much better would it have been to have Jack’s death be the cliffhanger until next season? Anything would’ve been better than the actual ending tonight. I thought it was pretty much a letdown. They should’ve killed off somebody important!
My guess is that he is alone in a room somewhere, and in that room is a single sheet of paper. On that paper are written the words Jack whispered to Nina in Season 2 that seemed to frighten her so much.
Anyone think Jack, Tony, Michelle and Chloe will ride around next season in a black van righting wrongs on behalf of the defenseless?
“In 2005, Agent Jack Bauer was charged with a crime by a Chinese tribunal that he, uh, did in fact commit. He promptly escaped from a CTU holding cell into the Los Angeles underground. If you have a problem, and if you can find him, maybe you can hire…The JB Team.”
Agent Ratfink: His name is…Jack Bauer!
Chinese Agent: Jack Bauer? Oh, shit. We don’t want any of THAT. You’re free to go. Tell Mr. Bauer we’re sorry for anything we, China, or any of our immigrants to your country have ever done. Just don’t tell him you ever saw me.
[/Sane World]
I mean, hell, doesn’t Jack have a kill total higher than most armies?
Everything that happened tonight was predictable beyond belief. I was sitting with a group of friends watching this, and we called out every “twist”. And no way the Chinese are going to buy the idea that Jack is dead. They’ll want to see the body.
They should have had Chloe picking up Jack as he walked down the rr tracks.
(Haven’t read the thread yet, so please forgive me.)
Holy crap. First time I have seen an entire season. What a finale.
Favorite moments:
Hot Terrorist Babe tasers Tony just to keep him occupied. HTB has a thigh-mounted holster. HTB…, well, anything HTB does.
The men’s locer room apparently has a glass wall. :eek: :eek: :eek:
President Allstate: “Jack, I have bad news. President Wussy is going to turn you over to the Chinese in 10 minutes.”
Jack: “I understand.”
…
Jack: “Chloe, I have a few minutes to spare, and some beer in my locker. Would you like to rehash the day’s events in the commissary?”
Chloe: “Sure! I just have to clear my buffers!” :rolleyes: “(He noticed me! He noticed me!)”
Or howbout, “your embassay was holding a Chinese national that was directly involved in the theft of a nuclear warhead and the launch of a missile carrying that warhead against the second largest city in the United States. Rather than turning him over, you protected him in your embassay. Had that warhead impacted on its target, the United States would have held China directly responsible for the lives that would have been lost. Jack Bauer was at your embassay. He did take the man you were protecting. His actions almost single handedly stopped the missile. He is a national hero of the highest rank. He is in Los Angeles, awaiting your apology for your role in the attempted murder of over 1 million Americans. (Oh, yea, sorry about your counsel, but he was killed by your own men.)”
I think, in the next season, Jack and NakedMandy should team up to fight terrorism. They could travel around in the van with Michelle and Tony (and throw in Chloe too). Their one and only rule would be that all disagreements would be settled with bra and panties all girl pillowfights. Ratings would be at an all time high.
