Ok guys, I finally made it. So what’s my surprise??? You gotta come up with something NICE, but unusual.
** Sigh. So many men, so few who can afford me ** Original by Wally
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
Homepage: www.superlativeandsassy.com
Occupation: Temptress
Location: Ultra, California
Interests: surpluses, excesses, abundances, extras, lagniappes
profile by UncleBeer
Wooooooooohooooooooooo way to go Ultress. Finally you have hit the Big One!! Congratulations and keep up the good work!!
Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man
Well, it’s about time! Keep it up and you’ll pass my pitiful post count.
Homepage: www.loosiegoosiemoosie.gov
Occupation: Taxidermist and hunt guide
Location: Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, Canada
Interests: The Loyal Order of the Moose, Moosehead (and the beer).
Oh yeah? Well, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. Backwards. In high heels. - As per Wally
And while you guys are thinking of her surprise, you may as well think of mine while you’re at it. Cause baby, I ain’t far behind!!
“Organs gross me out. That’s organs, not orgasms.”
-the wallster
The surprise is you’re getting laid by a doper. Really!
Moosie? Would you do the honours?
Moi? What the hell do I know about sex? :o
P.S. Way to go, Mega!
Geesh Coldfire, you sure forgot the field of tulips fast enough.
** Sigh. So many men, so few who can afford me ** Original by Wally
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
Homepage: www.superlativeandsassy.com
Occupation: Temptress
Location: Ultra, California
Interests: surpluses, excesses, abundances, extras, lagniappes
profile by UncleBeer
I meant Moosie should join me in errrrmm tuliping you, Ultress 
Hmmm. Gives a whole new meaning to tiptoeing through the two lips.
Congrats Ultress from your southern friend.
The suprise? I am on my way to your house with a bottle of $7.00 austi spumanti. You’ll soon see that money is no object when it comes to my pals!
And the bubbly is just for openers!
One of the few to be personally welcomed to this board by Ed Zotti.
Yours truly,
aha
OK, if we don’t watch ourselves, we’ll be on the main page next week.
Thread Picking: Who says we’re a sad bunch? We ROCK! Watch regulars exchanging sexual innuendo whilst on a rare break from Fighting Ignorance!!
Hmmmm don’t you mean your ‘best friend’ aha??? I’m waiting for you, you might get a surprise of your own. Just ask the guys that have gotten the emails…lol
** Sigh. So many men, so few who can afford me ** Original by Wally
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
Homepage: www.superlativeandsassy.com
Occupation: Temptress
Location: Ultra, California
Interests: surpluses, excesses, abundances, extras, lagniappes
profile by UncleBeer
Sorry “best friend” that’s right.
I can see it now…when you open your front door the first thing you are gonna say is,
“Is that a bottle of spumanti or are you just glad to see me?”
One of the few to be personally welcomed to this board by Ed Zotti.
Yours truly,
aha
TAAADAA!
:::Cristi pops up out of huge, 12-tiered cake, wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a smile:::
SURPRISE!
How’s that? Are you surprised?
Ultress?
Ooooh Ultress?
Damn. I think she’s unconscious. Sorry. Didn’t mean to surprise you that bad.
Cristi, Slayer of Peeps
I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday.
(title & sig courtesy of UncleBeer and WallyM7!)
Ultress, pay no attention to these guys.
They just want to have their way with you.
Wait a minute, so do I.
Never mind…
If sexual innuendo and fighting ignorance were switched, it would be a little more accurate.
My present to Ultress for her 500th post is to go back and reread her email then spend some quality time alone.
Well, honey just tastes better when it comes from a bear’s head.
Cristi, I think we will hire you for Cold’s next birthday 
Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man
Ultress, send me your address so I can mail me to you ASAP.
Well, you asked for nice and unusual - I’m qualified.
Mega, send yours too. I’ll have Ultress forward when she’s done.
No? Damn!
The ideal thing would be for one of us guys to turn one of your wonderful emails into a reality for you.
Since I’m of the married persuasion, I must (with deepest reluctance!) decline to volunteer. But I’m sure some of the other recipients might step forward…
I shall send you a poem!
A russian one of course since I know no others.
happy 500.
looking forward to reading 500 more.