It is July and here in England there is a big yellow hot, shiny thingy in the sky.
Word on the street is that it’s called The Sun (not the newspaper I add)
Now this is quite, nay, extremely unusual for these fair isles as normally in July it rains, come to that it rains most other times as well but I digress.
I am quite worried to be perfectly honest with you. Our English summer by tradition consists of 3 maybe 4 days of sunshine at most but for the past 4 weeks or so we’ve had very little"Send it down Gabriel, make the buggers have it" type rain.
Apart from a few odd showers we have been wet free.
What does all this currant bun mean?
Is Manchester to become the haunt of playboy millionares and their buxom wenches in seach of sun, sea and sex…and Boddies best bitter.
Are our country pubs to be invaded by seething masses of German tourists throwing towels over the pub chairs.
Can we expect to see rampaging bulls in the streets of Pimlico or even Italians rowing gondolas along the Thames river.
Is fair Newcastle to be swamped by teeming millions of French cycling willy nilly up and down tyrying to flog onions.
I tell you, if Winston were alive this would never have happened