A Mild Rant: Please quit commenting on my appearance.

The BBQ Pit
1

Why is it that people feel the need to comment on my appearance? I am truly confused.

[ul]
-at Winner’s trying on clothes with a friend. She says “You’ve put on weight - look at that fat roll!”

-at work, apropos of nothing “Hey - you’ve gained weight.”

-at work, apropos of nothing “Hey - you’ve lost weight”

-at a coffee shop Me - “I would like some steamed skim milk please.” Them - “But you’re so skinny - you don’t need skim”

  • at another coffee shop Me - “I would like a cookie please.” Them - “Oh - you mean you’re not anorexic?”

  • at another coffee shop Me – “I would like a tall latte with skim milk please.” Them – “We’ve got a weight-watcher here!”

-at a club “Wow - you have a really great ass/tits/legs, etc.”

-at the gym while I’m changing “Hey - you’ve got killer abs!”

-at work “You’re too well groomed - men look at you and think ‘Expensive’”

-at other work “You just look like your high maintenance and bitchy.”

[/ul]

Listen people, it’s true, I do care about my appearance. I try to look my best, and do take time to work out, choose my outfits, and do my hair and makeup to enhance my outward look. I do this to look professional and also because it makes me feel good.

I do not do this because I’m trying to invite commentary from the peanut gallery, OK?

If I’m naked, and my man comments that I look hot, fine. Otherwise, I’m not really that interested in having my appearance dissected for your amusement, if you don’t mind.

Thank you, that is all.

2

And Muffin streaks through the thread.

{Oops, I didn’t realize alice_in_wonderland had started a non-nekkid thread.}

And Muffin walks back into the thread, properly attired this time, hoping no one will comment on his appearance.

You know, life is a lot easier on the boards. Sorry to hear some folks’ real life comments are getting to you. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

3

Ya know, just when you think your reputation has been restored, someone has to bring up the old naked doper thread again…

It was a mild rant, I’m not really upset. I just can’t fathom why people think any of these comments are appropriate or warented.

<sigh>

4

I have a similar problem, except that it’s whenever I see people I haven’t talked to in a long time. They always exclaim, “Hey!!! You’ve lost weight!!”

::pause::

NO I HAVEN’T!!!

Silly people. The moral of the story… don’t let people see you.

5

I guess that rules out another nudity thread…

6

Hmph. And the damned Errant Smiley Of Doom has struck a SPOOFE post once again. Curses.

7

If one of these happened to me:

My response would have probably been, “Actually, forget about it. I’ll go somewhere where the staff can keep their obnoxious comments to themselves.”

If it was a friend who said it, I’d probably ask them why my eating habits were any of their fucking concern.

Then again, I’m really tired of people thinking they can joke about my weight just because I’m tiny.

8

Yah, people seem to think that if your a bit on the smallish side that gives them carte blanche to say whatever they want.

The comments that really piss me off, however, are the ones where people say that I look bitchy.

Pardon me? I look bitchy? What does bitchy look like? In shape and well groomed, because that always seems to be the explanation.

::grumble…grumble…grumble::

9

Definitely, definitely, definitely! I’m not even that small - about an Australian size 6-8 (what’s that American? Size 3? 4?) and I hate getting those “oh, you’re so thin! You need to put on weight or else you’re going to blow away” comments. Of course, these people wouldn’t dream of going up to an overweight person and saying “wow, you’re a little chubby! You need to lose some weight or else you’re going to fall through the floor”. Nobody - regardless of whether they’re small, large or peanut-shaped - wants unsolicited comments from strangers about their weight.

10

My mother-in-law and her husband, Nimrod, used to tell me that I lost weight EVERY SINGLE TIME they saw me. (I never had). It was just a way of saying “we notice your (heavy) weight.” And it was hard to fight against, because they claimed they were “paying me a compliment.” :rolleyes: I tried to discourage them nicely, but to no avail.

One day I said to them, “My weight is none of your business. Do not mention my weight ever again. Ever.” Believe it or not, it worked.

11

Or their body parts, for that matter. Even if the comments are “flattering”.

Frankly, some chick I don’t know checking me out at the gym and making comments about my body parts impresses me about as much as some guy checking me out at a club and making comments about my body parts.

Ew.

12

I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole and I can’t get up!

Gosh… given the tone of your post some cynical people might think you’d go nuts if people didn’t comment of your appearance to the point you even had to start a thread about what a bitchin’ bod you’ve got. But they’re just jealous. Well congrats for being such a well groomed hardbody! I won’t hate you because you’re beautiful! Here’s a cookie as a reward.

13

??
I said that people commented that:

I looked anorexic
Had a new fat roll
Had gained weight
Had lost weight
Was too skinny
Was a “weight-watcher”
Looked bitchy
Looked expensive.

I’m not sure where the “hardbody” part comes into it, unless your talking about the gym comment, which I only included, because who the hell starts commenting to someone they don’t know, who’s half naked, about their body parts?

Anyhow, bite me. I’m sick of people making unsolicited comments about my weight/body/appearance, etc. I think that my actual weight/body/appearance is irrelevant to my point, and the comments were only included as specific examples.

14

I know what you mean, and it’s NOT NICE, people!

“Oh, you should lose weight!”
“You should really go on a diet…”
“Have you ever tried, y’know, physical activity?”
etc., etc., etc.

My appearance is none of your business!

15

Frankly, being reduced to a single body part by a complete stranger really doesn’t do much of anything to make a person feel good about themselves.

16

I think you’re way off base, astro. Sounds like Alice has a realistic view of herself, and is confident because she is nice-looking. (Nice to hear from a woman who is not down on herself.)

17

How about “I like your blouse”?

18

:slight_smile: That is just fine Matt.

And thank you. It’s new.

19

matt–there’s a difference between paying someone a real compliment and commenting on their body and/or parts. Saying “I like your blouse,” or “you look really nice today,” are fine. Saying “I like your tits” or “you look thin today” are not.

20

YES!

Really, when someone comments:

“Hey - You’ve got great tits!”

What am I supposed to respond?

“Oh would you like to buy my tits a drink?
Perhaps dance with my tits?
Take my tits out to dinner?
Introduce my tits to the family?
What? Oh wait - my tits just commented that they find your dick too wimpy, so nevermind.”
Honestly - does that kind of line EVER work?!?!