Yes, when we first showed up I thought to attribute some of it to a shyness over-reaction. But it did not lessen as the day went on (I myself tend to sit quietly until I have taken a measure of everybody, but then I start to loosen up). Further, it completely matches your behavior here on the boards and after six months that hasn’t stopped.
Zenster, I already KNOW what sort of person you are. We all went to school with people like you and we all have worked with people like you. You are the sort to send women strange emails and not identify yourself. You are the sort to barge into someone’s private conversation and take the “quantity over quality” approach with your words. You are the sort to take something that people do on occasion for fun, and do it all the time and make everyone sick of it. You are the sort to assume everyone likes the same things you do, and appreciates your sense of humor. I agree with all Obfusciatrist’s points, and that’s just from your emails and postings on the board! Did you notice after the Folsom Street Fair you couldn’t get anyone to show up at your Halloween gathering?
Oh, you people. Be nice.
I’ve never seen such an organized or efficient ripping apart of people.
I’m not sure whether to applaud or to look on all of you with disgust.
But I’ll just second matt_mcl’s admonition.
Maybe you could come to the Super Bowl party and stay on the other side of the room from Zenster? It sounds like there will be enough people there to serve as a buffer.
If this isn’t the wormy underbelly of the SDMB, I don’t know what is. You know, this board is a fun place. It is (largely) populated by intelligent, tolerant people. It’s a real shame to see that it is not immune to a pointless pissing contest. Shit like this makes me want to have nothing to do with this board. And it sure as hell makes me glad I’m nowhere near the West Coast, so I don’t feel any temptation to come to one of the Dopefests or parties.
This is fucking ugly, people.
If this isn’t the wormy underbelly of the SDMB, I don’t know what is. You know, this board is a fun place. It is (largely) populated by intelligent, tolerant people. It’s a real shame to see that it is not immune to a pointless pissing contest. Shit like this makes me want to have nothing to do with this board. And it sure as hell makes me glad I’m nowhere near the West Coast, so I don’t feel any temptation to come to one of the Dopefests or parties.
This is fucking ugly, people. This kind of shit makes JDT look noble by comparison. I’d rather suffer through a million R_dawgs that this slimy, disgusting, greasy shit.
And don’t tell me not to read it if I don’t like it. You’re ugly-ing up the whole board. It spreads like a miasma.
Sorry for the repeat post. My connex is acting weird. I originally hit “send,” then thought I should clarify things a bit, and since the send request (apparently) hadn’t gone through, I stopped it.
Once again, sorry.
I would like to congratulate Ogre on the first correct usage of the word “miasma” in BBQ Pit history. I award you 183 points and a “Roll Again” card.
Also, I’d just like to add that I used to be a Zenster. Then I shut my trap and let others take their stage. I enjoy life so much more now.
I have to agree with Ogre here. This is getting really fucking ugly.
Yeah, ok, there are people who don’t like Zenster–but guess what folks? That’s fucking life for ya’ there. You are going to run into people throughout your entire lifetime that you’re not going to like, but does that stop you from leaving your house?
Who says that you have to sit next to him at a DopeFest? Who says that you even have to be in the same room with him? Go to the party, socialize with the people you want to socialize with, have a good time, and go home. Is that so difficult?
Yeah, I know it’s the pit, but for chrissake… didn’t your mother tell you if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all? It’s common courtesy. It’s easy to spill your venom here, because it’s safe–you won’t get popped in your snot box for telling someone he’s an asshole. But, there is a point when it needs to stop and a truce declared to keep a level of civility on the board, before it starts to boil over into other sectors.
Can’t you people finally agree to disagree, and call it over? No one is even telling you to kiss and make up–just fucking stop.
It’s this kind of tension that makes me uncomfortable about going to the NoCal/SoCal DopeFest.
Didn’t you read the description of The Pit, DUMBASS? This is the designated “wormy underbelly” of the board. This is where flaming is permitted.
What are you doing posting here, anyway? I mean, there’s obviously no law against you posting here, but given that this is pretty much a Bay Area argument, what made you think we wanted or needed your commentary? Butt the hell out.
matt_mcl: Why? Zenster and I don’t really care for each other. Should we pretend otherwise for your (or LaurAnge’s or Ogre’s) benefit? I think that all you can ask is that we play nice and I think that if you examine the exchange between me and Zenster you will find that it has been polite, though strongly felt. Especially for a Pit thread.
vogue_vixen: Thanks for the agreement but you are doing it in a rhetoric I would prefer to avoid in this thread. I don’t own this thread so all I can do is ask that you bring the tone down a bit.
Ogre: As I pointed out, these boards have had thousands of users. Do you really consider it a hidden underbelly that there are people among those thousands? And it is most certainly not a miasma that will spread throughout the boards; it not leave the Pit (again, I’ll point out that by Pit standards this has been tame). I would hypothesize that what pieces of dislike that Zenster and I have shown on other parts of SDMB are because we were avoiding making that dislike explicit. Now that it is out in the open, I know I feel better.
LaurAnge: I’m not sure what you mean by organized. As for efficient, I am not trying to maliciously “rip apart” Zenster. He asked (admittedly, he did so only after I asked if he wanted to ask) me to explain my dislike for him. I did so, and I think I did so on mostly polite terms. Above all, I did so alone! I did not ask for any opinions of others (I did say that people could say what they thought of me; Zenster later said the same about himself). If you are disgusted by the sight of two people not liking each other and explaining why, there is little I can do about that.
Zenster: I did take acceptable actions to cure my bad time. I left. I do not view it as my duty to correct the behaviors of people I do not like. I view it as my duty to ignore them when possible and put up with them when necessary. And, believe it or not, that is what I tried to do with you. But you and I are both active participants on these boards and we are going to cross paths. Sensing my dislike for you, you perceived anything I said in your presence as a barb at you. Honestly, I did not mean them that way. Finally you called me on it and here we are. I think that though it is heated, you and I have both behaved well in this thread, my sarcasm (or patronization as you put it) was unnecesary and served no purpose. I’m sure that at minimum you and I can come to an agreement to dislike each other. But if I should have done it then, I’ve done it now. Consider yourself remonstrated.
Anybody attending Sue’s Super Bowl party: Do NOT consider changing your mind because of this exchange. I will withdraw from the party before I will allow anybody else to decline because of me and Zenster. If that would be your preference just send me an email and it will be done.
Sue Duhnym: I have given you plenty of reason to doubt whether you want me in your home. I understand and accept any decision you make.
Damn it, Snooooopy, now I have to ask you to tone it down as well.
My problems with Zenster stem primarily from these boards. Meeting him only solidified my opinions. So it is a board issue and not just a Bay Area issue. Ogre is as welcome to participate here anybody else.
I do not own the thread so all I can do is ask that even though this is the Pit we keep the language civil.
Just because this is the Pit doesn’t make you any less of a jerk for posting this kind of thing, Snooooopy. See, in real life, this kind of behavior would get you punched in the face. If someone has a legitimate gripe about something on the Board, bring it to the Pit. If you have a problem with another Doper, and you try to solve it by airing out your psychic dirty laundry here rather than talking it over with the other person, you’re a jerk. Plain and simple. Pit or no. Try not to use the rules of a fucking internet message board to excuse your crass lack of civility.
As for your comments to me, fuck it. I have a thick skin. My self-image is not so poor that I’m going to let a complete stranger get to me.
Whether you want or need my commentary is immaterial. You got it. Normally, I would keep my nose out of it, but this is pretty ugly, even by Pit standards. The only uglier thing I can think of in recent memory was the FreakFreely fiasco.
obfusciatrist,
Perhaps the term “wormy underbelly” was overstated. I just don’t like to see any person get thoroughly hacked apart. Not that I’m a wide-eyed “can’t we all just get along?” type, but it’s painful to witness. I just wish that this interpersonal problem had been handled via email, rather than here. Other than that, hey, peace. I’m certainly not trying to escalate it.
Hypocrite.
Don’t you EVER lecture me about civility when you’re cussing me out at the same time! Don’t you EVER get on a moral high horse when you’re being as crass as anybody!
I want to “fucking” be just like you, because you’re so “fucking” civil.
I’d like to apologize for my early-on post in which I encouraged an exchange. I didn’t realize so much was involved, and, like Ogre, I find it painful to witness. Still, as has been stated, these two gentlemen have kept the tone of their discussion civil and honest, and I find them good examples of how intelligent people should sort out their differences. That’s why Alphagene hasn’t come in and given us all a Dutch rub and double eye-gouge.
Snooooopy,
You’re right. That was hypocritical, and I apologize. I let my temper run away with me, which is always a mistake. It was a reaction to your presumptuous “DUMBASS” comment. I suppose my skin could stand to be thicker.
My main point stands, minus the crass language, of course. There is no need to clutter the boards with a personal war, when the issue could have just as easily been broached via email.
I apologize, too. There was no need for me to be exclusive. And, while you’re also right that I might have earned a punch in the face in real life, that’s the whole point of why I get all crazy in the Pit (during my infrequent excursions here). The signpost said flaming’s OK, so I flamed.
If Zenster has said his peace, it doesn’t look like this thread has a reason to live, so I’ll bow out … unless my temper gets the best of me, of course.
I’ve been following this thread for obvious reasons, being a B.A.D. (Bay Area Doper) and all, and I’ve been avoiding posting to it like the plague. But I have to agree with Ogre. This is like watching a fistfight at a wedding reception.
I understand that not everybody likes everybody. But if this whole matter would have been handled privately at least we innocent children would have been spared.
I’m disheartened that we B.A.D.'s can’t come together and be civilized, but I can’t force anyone to go against their gut.
Now I have met Zenster. I have not met obfusciatrist so I am not even going to offer any opinions about either one of you guys. That wouldn’t be fair. But let me say this - obfusciatrist, if you’d had said, “I’m sorry I won’t be attending,” and left it at that, no one would have been the wiser. We may have assumed it was because you didn’t want to hang out with Zenster, and we’d probably understand. I just don’t get what the need is for you to tell us all why we shouldn’t like Zenster too. I can make my own opinions.
I’ll go to Sue’s party. There may or not be people there who I don’t get a long with, but I’m not going to let it ruin my fun.
P.S. - Snooooopy, Jesus, when you drop the gloves, you’re a fucking demon.