Because I’m responsible for this forum, in a silly, stupid way I think of you all as my children. Some events recently have really made me think about things here.
The Straight Dope community is much stronger here in MPSIMS far more than any other forum because it’s here where we share our lives, our losses, our joys and sadnesses, our defeats and dreams. It’s here where we get to know each other as people rather than as disembodied ideas. Consequently, the possibility of hurt feelings is much greater here, even more so than in the Pit.
When I was working at a Southern Baptist conference center down in North Carolina, I heard a preacher named Doug Manning say that if we walked a mile in each others shoes, if we really lived each others lives for a while, chances are at the end of the mile we’d take our own shoes and go home. The temptation is there when reading the board to see someone else’s life as much better than yours or that yours is more pathetic by way of comparison. God knows I’ve been as guilty about this as anyone. I’d be the first to moan and groan about having to read a thread about someone else’s wonderful and exciting sex life. And most of you have seen my dark side as well.
We’re all debbils. We all have demons. Sometimes we find joy and revel in it and ask others to revel with us because for some of us joy is too fleeting in this lifetime. In the same way sometimes we find sadness and find it necessary to revel in it as well in order to master the darkness. And sometimes the joy overflows and we can’t help but let it spill over into everything we say. In the same way sometimes the darkness takes us and colors our every word. But both are threads in the same tapestry and neither would be complete without the other.
As with most religious beliefs there is no empirical evidence for this but I truly believe that underneath it all we are all connected in some way. That we cannot hurt each other without hurting ourselves. That you cannot truly love without loving yourself. And that when you heal another, you’re also healing something deep inside your own being. You are not always the target. And you are attached to what you attack.
So be good to each other. In the long run each other may be all we have.
[Edited by Eutychus55 on 04-14-2001 at 09:28 AM]
I love this forum. From the posts that are from people who are so happy they can almost will the sun to come out to the ones from people suffering depressions so dark that it’s painful enough to make me cry and make my problems with school and whatever seem so , not unimportant, just not as big a deal as my temper was making them. It’s great to see everyone rally around each other in the good and bad. No matter what you’re going through there is always, * always **someone here to either offer insight or an ear.
Yes we do touch each other here, and so of course the risk of hurt - even inadvertant - is much higher as well. I’m often disappointed by people’s rashness at times though it’s obvious they meant no offence or hurt.
Trying to understand and help is far better (IMO) than comparing to yourself. Tis a much nobler cause.
The reason I stay here is because no matter what, there’s always someone here who understands where I’m at in life, and can offer a shoulder. And when I see someone here who is in a situation that I’ve been in myself, I try to do the same. I don’t always succeed, but I try as best as I can, because Euty is right–we may be all we have.
I completely agree, Duck. For me (and please don’t hijack this beautiful thread if you disagree), that statement ranks right up there with “It’s only a message board.”
It is place to come to share ideas but it’s also a place where many of us come to share our lives. We share our personal triumphsand our failures. We celebrate our strengths and ask for help with our weaknesses.
Because of this message board, I have has the homor and the privilege of getting to know some of the dearest, most amazing friends I have ever known.
This is a place I feel I can share bad news or good news and still receive the same kind of compassion and helpfulness from the people here. I hope it stays that way.
This is just what I was telling a co-worker the other day. She was commenting how I was hooked on this message board, and I tried to explain that since hooking up here (I am new to this) I feel like I can relate to so many people here. The messages make me laugh, cry, and even get angry sometimes. After going through what I have in the last 6 months, I was beginning to wonder if I could ever feel anything but pain again in this lifetime. This message board has been my prescription for a small step into the land of the living again, and I thank each and every one of you. And thank you Euty for expressing it better than I ever could.{{People of SDMB}}
Too new to act like he knows anybody, too shy to be able to open up freely, too in touch with his own demons to claim to be a nice guy, KneadToKnow nevertheless hopes one day to be half the man Eutychus55 is.
He’ll start by putting an end to this ridiculous third person crap.
And that’s why I can’t quit. God knows that I have tried. But I can talk about things with you people I can’t with “real” people. There is something about the separation and anonymity that helps.