I’d certainly like to think that that’s the case. 
Boost my ego a bit. Was this the pic you saw, GuanoLad?
Cessandra
Why sex is better than religion: You can scream “Oh, God” during sex, but just trying saying “Oh, f***” in church!
women LOVE ASSHOLES!!! always have always will… how many times have I seen a guy treating a sweet wonderful girl like SHIT??? too many times to fucking count… makes me fucking sick… My first reaction is to beat the living shit out of the bastard… then she would have me thrown in jail. I am a nice guy… I finish last… the “psudohunk/strut up with the cheesey line gonna fuck you in the closet tonight then call you in two weeks when im horny” bastard gets the girls… Makes me sick, but over the years I’ve deceided thats what women want. Thats all I see. Sweet guys who value a relationship get nowhere!!! I’m gonna change, if thats what they want… then thats what I’ll pretend to be!
MC… you are right on… I agree with just about everything you said! dont understand it… but I agree with it.
Cess:
Yup, you’re a fox, don’t ever lemme hear ya say different.
Your senior picture reminds me of an off-topic story I wanna share: I’m wearing 2 tuxedo jackets in my senior pic. They didn’t have one jacket that fit me, so I put one arm in one jacket, then one in another, and pinned them together behind me. Can’t tell from the picture.
Anyway. Resume topic. I can’t get laid. It really sucks.
If you’re a nice guy, things improve with age. In your teens and twenties, females your own age aren’t assertive enough as a general rule to control the outcome of who is with whom, or, if they are, they have previous hurts and sort spots and may be cynical about males. By the time you’re in your thirties, women are generally more philosophical about gender wars, and more balanced in their understanding of being male versus being female, neither hero-worshiping guys (& becoming a doormat) nor being contemptuous of them. But they have no experience of playing with males as equals and often still get swallowed up in conventional sex-role expectations that they think of as the definition of being treated the way they should be treated. By their forties, they are on a substantially more even keel; they can live with or without a male, and if the choice is “with”, they can tally up whether or not they’d be better off without you, but if you’re fun they don’t stand much on propriety, sex-role-wise or otherwise. Of course by then your hormones are in decline and you are growing a tummy and maybe you don’t care so much anyway.
Don’t wait until you are 40; date a 40 year old female while you are 20.
Designated Optional Signature at Bottom of Post
HMMMM.
If you’re a nice guy, things improve with age? Don’t you believe it. The only thing that happens is that you wind up scraping together the pieces of older women and putting them together so they can run off and find some jerk to hang around with.
Some shy ‘nice guys’ and I in school used to drive around and we’d see the prettiest girls hanging onto the nastiest dude in clumps 3 and 4 deep! Especially around the end of the 60s and the beginning of the 70s. We used to joke that if we wanted to get some nice girls, we had better let our hair grow long, stop shaving, stop bathing, start stinking and treating people like crap and we’d get all the chicks we want.
You know, that concept sort of works. I went through a period in my life where I was damn tired of being nice, started drinking heavily and not giving a shit. I decided that all I wanted was pussy – period. No more listening to their problems and helping out. No more being thoughtful and considerate. No more treating them like they were special. No more going out of my way for them.
I partied hardy!
You know what! I wound up with 3 girlfriends at once! GO FIGURE! The only thing I did was let them know that I saw others and I went out and partied. I even sometimes turned down requests by them to ‘drop over’ after work because I was headed for the strip clubs. I did not buy them gifts. When we got together all I wanted to do was fuck and was not interested in much else. I cooked them no meals and even if they complained about not feeling good, I pushed getting a piece of ass. I sent them no cute cards, no stuffed animals, no flowers and was always on the look for other chicks.
I could take my pick of snatch! They kept coming back!
I, however, could not stay in that lifestyle and had to cut down on the booze and parties and started being nice and considerate again. You know, it’s real hard to change your basic personality. It always leaks through in the end.
I lost 'em all. From then on in I’ve had problems in getting to know nice chicks. (Especially since I had to give up booze! Did a little TOO MUCH drinking.) I am still bemused by that period of time. (Some of the best fun I ever had!) treated them kind of badly and they pounded on my door. Treat them with consideration and they won’t even drop me a letter.
Go figure.
By the way, I clicked on that PIX link a few messages up and, hey, pretty girl. What is she, something like SIXTEEN? Geez!
Mark
“Think of it as Evolution in action.”
No, Cessandra. I had seen that pic before, though, and no doubts you are very pretty!
But this pic was of a blonde (or maybe she was a redhead, I dunno, I’m kind of colourblind) and below it was another pic of a child of maybe five(?), which I figured was the progeny of the woman in the first pic. Whom I thought was Michelle.
By the way, although being a boring kind of guy doesn’t help, I think shyness is the real culprit. I’m fairly certain every ‘nice’ guy here would also describe themselves as shy.
Me too.
sigh
-PIGEONMAN-
Hero For A New Millennium!
The Legend Of PigeonMan - updates every Wed & Sat
No, MarkSerlin, I am NOT sixteen. I am a college freshman, and I am nearly NINETEEN. It may only be two and a half years, but it is a BIG difference.
I may have to hit you, now.
Cessandra
Why sex is better than religion: You can scream “Oh, God” during sex, but just trying saying “Oh, f***” in church!
Is anyone noticing that all of these self-proclaimed nice guys are coming across as really bitter, self-absorbed, and sometimes downright rude?
Women only go for “nice” if it’s genuine, folks.
I was married for 11 years(still am married, but not living with him) to a jerk. He was damaged emotionally by his parents who clearly favored his older brother. He had a horrible temper and a drinking problem and while I was living with him, I walked on eggshells, trying not to anger him, my shoulders, neck, and jaw were alway tight. He has a bad back and is on social security disability. When I lived with him, I did 90% of the housework while he layed around all day watching tv. I was also paying most of the bills while he bought expensive stereo equipment. Well, this is one jerk that is finishing last.
I left him and now he can’t afford to live in the house.
Now, I would welcome a nice guy. I want a guy who is kind, loves kids and animals, smart, funny and has a job and a good attitude. Where is this guy? I am done with jerks and I’m sure there are a lot of women like me who feel the same. I am determined not to make the same mistake twice.
PS…now my husband has stopped drinking and is trying to be “a nice guy”. I think it’s too late.
–Gail
“Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have posed the question in the first place.” --John Cleese
Drain Bead:
Though I can’t speak for the rude, and somewhat acidic, comments by some of the ‘nice’ guys here, I can at least say something about being self-absorbed.
This is a subject that lonely people think about a lot at certain times. It tends to get examined in great introspective detail.
Personally, I try not to get too worked up about it, and 99% of the time it’s nary a concern. But when the subject comes up, all that introspective analysis finds an opportunity to be vented, and it sounds like I am obsessed with it all the time.
This is something I’m quite aware of too, so I try not to sound bitter about it. Actually, I’m more puzzled and frustrated than bitter. I’m not looking for anyone to blame.
Well, that’s my take on it, anyways.
-PIGEONMAN-
Hero For A New Millennium!
The Legend Of PigeonMan - updates every Wed & Sat
Gail… for someone that long gone… dont give a second chance… you will only regret it more then you do now! Changes like that last less then a few weeks… trust me.
Hell, Drain, you know me now…did I seem bitter in chat? I only get bitter when I’m actually discussing the alkali-flat scorched-earth stinkin’ desert that is my love life.
See? It’s just that here, the topic is what total shit my/our love lifes are, so we’re bitter. We’re not like this in everyday discourse, really.
[hijack]
Gail, you sound exactly like my mom! She has been married for 11 years now to a jerk named Bob (I call him el diablo or Satan{not to be confused with SD’s devil)). He was a lazy pain in the ass who cared nothing about me and my sisters and only wanted to lay out in the sun, work out and buy stuff he couldn’t afford. She’s finally leaving him on December 1st. (I get to help her move out! I’m so happy!) He had bad tempers and liked to yell and make a big fuss over really trivial stuff, sort of like a 14 year old would~ even though he’s 44. Bob, being the pig he is, cheated on my mom, lied to her face, stole her money, put her in debt and acted as if he were a King. I have come very close to getting into altercations with this man, he’s pissed me off so much. Okay, 'nuff venting here… must go celebrate Bob’s demise!
[/hijack]
“I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”-- Calvin and Hobbes
(__)
\/-------\ | |-----| |
…c.c…c.c…
BTW, here is a pic of Michelle (not me).
The reason nice guys don’t hook up with beautiful, sexy, attractive women is mainly because beautiful, sexy, and attractive women don’t care that much about niceness; they care about looks.
Oh my! Thank you Cessandra for posting the correct link to
Michelle’s pix. What is she, about SEVENTEEN??
This sux. All of the pretty and cute ones are like half my age!
Bitterness in some of our ‘nice guy posts’? Yes, I would expect that there would be. By now, we’ve been handed our heart and our heads so many times that we’re bitter, gun shy and some of are convinced that the assholes win in the end. Many of us have done little things like read up on women in books written by women on what women like, and still Joe Stud is the one women turn to.
Most of us are not what could be described as handsome, at least by current standards. (I recall a post with some woman chastising me about guys paying more attention to the anorexic women shown in television ads.) We don’t look like those square jawed, MANLY men with the flashing eyes, rippled abdominal muscles, casually styled black hair and 4 o’clock shadow on their macho cheeks.
Most of us kind of resemble the cast of Revenge of the Nerds. Many of us wear our hearts on our sleeves and, yes, many of us are very shy. I know I am. Not on-line where you cannot see me, but in person, face to face, and it takes me a bit to get to know a person, especially a girl, and even longer to feel comfortable with them.
Many of us are talented in many ways, though most of us have never gotten popular acclaim for what we do. I recall being called sweet and nice and kind so many times by women and then going home alone to sit in my chair alone and actually physically ache because I desperately wanted someone to hold but was alone. The women and girls were out partying with the Macho men.
I used to frequent topless bars because there a beautiful girl pays attention to a guy and flirts with him so long as he has money. Plus there is always the secret hope that she might ‘date’ him, or the possibility that he could ‘rent’ her services. I was so well known that the bouncer let me in without paying a cover charge. Dancers knew me as a ‘nice’ guy and would flock to my table because I’d not hassle them and would buy them their wine coolers without the wine, so they could sober up. (That almost got me in trouble with the other patrons a few times.)
It was GREAT! All of these seminude chicks around me, sometimes I’d have one on my lap, holding her upright while she sobered up and (after a pitcher of beer, of course), I’d be fending off other drunks who wanted to harass the girls.
Sometimes I even went out into the parking lot and fished them out of guys cars when it was time for their set, carried them home after work or took them to breakfast.
Not one dated me. None would see me after work or before work. I used to joke with friends that I could be the only guy in a whorehouse and not get laid. Even when I did not have a bunch of money to spend, they’d cluster at my table to sober up and now and then the bartender would give me a free pitcher of beer.
Once, when going home after working on a friends car on a late Friday night, I found this girl face down on the shoulder of the road. Drunk! Perfect opportunity for some guys I know! I got her up, put her in the car, managed to find out that she had been punched a few times and thrown out of her guys car because she wouldn’t put out. She wouldn’t call the cops, so I managed to find out where she lived and took her home to her folks.
I never saw her again. Go figure! (On television, THAT would be the start of a whole, fantastic relationship.)
Nice guys finish last! I once slid under a burning car with a fire extinguisher to put out the fire while the lady who owned the car watched in fear and a whole restaurant full of people stood around doing nothing. Now, on television, I’d get my name in the paper, be praised by the car owner, admired by the many girls who were there and congratulated by the firemen who showed up too late. Plus, I even opened the hood, found the burnt wires and assured the woman that repairs would be inexpensive.
I got buttkiss! Nada! Zilch! The firemen simply asked me what I had used to put the fire out with and that was that. I even hung around a bit, expecting a thank you from the woman, but got nothing. I never even got into the local paper. The following day I had to get my fire extinguisher refilled and it was as if nothing had ever happened.
I could go on and on, but this post is getting too long – AGAIN! Anyhow, I think any of us who sound bitter, kinda deserve to. Most of us can’t stop being the kind of guy who catches people when they fall and helps set them on their feet again, only to be kicked in the slats for our efforts. We whine here because that’s what this particular post is for.
Besides, you out there don’t know who we really are so this stuff won’t come embarrassingly back to us later.
Mark
“Think of it as Evolution in action.”
Waha! That’s Michelle???
Holy crap! She’s a magazine model?
Er, sorry for drooling, folks. I’ll clean it up…
-PIGEONMAN-
Hero For A New Millennium!
The Legend Of PigeonMan - updates every Wed & Sat
Magazine model? Are you sure you are looking at the right picture? Little brunette chick, wearing a striped shirt?
And Mark, I am 30. That pic is a little old…I was prolly somewhere around 25-27 at the time. I haven’t changed much except my hair looks different and I am about 7 pounds heavier.
So far I have only been mailed one resume. (Really!) You lonely guys better hurry up and mail yours in!
-
-
- Millenium Prediction: All Men Will Become Assholes!!!
-
-
-
- Uh, DB, I’m not singling you out, but I doubt very much that you have the realization here that us guys do. What you said may be true in general or it may not, but either way -
-
-
-
- guys will actually become assholes because that’s what gets women, or,
-
-
-
- guys will only act like assholes while around women.
-
- Either way, eventually women suffer more: about the time they get tired of being used, they get ignored. - Formerly Nice Guys (FNG’s) figure out that sex is all women are good for anyway. That’s the reason that older men traditionally go for younger women - he figures if he’s gonna have to put up with someone emotionally unsatisfying, she might as well have a good body. And women his age get to spend their twighlight years as crazy old maids with a hundred cats. - MC
“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that. I’m just going to go on as if nothing had happened.” - Groucho Marx