So every few days, I change the background of my desktop. People at work see it as they walk by and usually comment. Today, I changed it to the cover of Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”. Well, apparently one of the girls saw it and said I had something wrong with me. She picked on me for wearing black pants because, that’s what one wears when they love Michael Jackson, apparently. In any case, I had yogurt for lunch and a blob dropped onto my thigh. I wiped it off as best I could, but there’s still a white splotch.
“You must love Michael Jackson” she says.
“No, it’s just yogurt”, I say, pointing out the spot on my pants.
She looked down.
“I was talking about the pants, but now I REALLY don’t know about you.”
“It’s yogurt! I don’t love little boys!”
Alllllll in front of the two hot blondes at work. Drat.
Surely it isn’t moi. I’m not bitching…I’m just…pointing out the trials and tribulations that only happen to me and Larry David. Let’s hope a German shepherd doesn’t bite my cock at someone’s house.
Even though it happened yesterday, you should douse your crotch with water. Sure, the yougurt’s on yesterday’s pants. But hey, at least it’ll show the HBs that you care, and then they won’t even remember that you like little boys. Oh, and change your desktop to Billy Madison for full effect.
If you ever choose a desktop image from There’s Something About Mary, be sure not to use gel in your hair that day. Might be best not to have franks ‘n’ beans for lunch, either.