I need some opinions here. I’ve been considering writing an old girlfriend of my dad’s. I am 30 now, and the last time I saw her was at my grandmother’s funeral when I was 18. She and my dad were together for 5 years or so, she had a young son, and they split up when I was about 9 or so. I really loved her a lot and we were very close. I was raised by my paternal grandparents and called my grandmother Mom, but I always looked at J as a mom, although she never knew that.
I have her parent’s address, but other than that, I don’t know how or where to reach her.
Do you think this is a good idea? I am sure she would love to hear from me, and I’d love to see her son again. He and I were like brother and sister for 5 years. Family trips and all. I’m not looking for anything and if she decided she didn’t want to see me again, I would accept that.
Should I just write her a letter and mail it to her parent’s place? Should I write her parents a letter and have them tell her? Help, please!!
If you know it will be received well, I say go for it!
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in moving around a lot it’s that keeping in touch is important – even if you can’t do it regularly. It’s always nice to know you’re being thought of, and sometimes a surprise greeting can come at just the right time in our lives.
I’d suggest writing her a letter directly, sealing it in an envelope with just her name and appropriate postage, and then inserting that in a larger envelope addressed to her parents. Write them a cordial letter explaining that you would greatly appreciate if they could address the letter for you and forward it to her current location.
That sounds like a good idea to me. You left each other on good terms, so I don’t see any problem. You are already bracing yourself for no reply or for a negative response. I’m guessing it will be a positive experience. Hope it turns out well.
As someone who dated a man for several years with two children that I adored, I say go for it. I’d be tickled pink to hear from those two (now adult) girls. I’m sure “Mom” will feel the same way. Good luck!
I have this habit of occasionally trying to contact long lost old friends. The worst so far has been a few no responses and a few unable to contacts. Usually, though, it’s been very fruitful, leading to meaningful communication.
And most of these were real longshots compared to what you have proposed. I say go for it.
Well, I am taking your advice dopers. I wrote her a little letter last night, nothing huge. Just to let her know that I do think about her and her son and that I am wondering how they’re doing.
Just dropped into the thread after the first wave of suspense is over (you’ve decided to go for it) but I was going to advise doing so. Best wishes!