(If you recognize the title, you’ve either got good taste in music or you’re oooold.
Or both.
)
I’ve got a massive foot infection and I’m on crutches for the first time in my life (crutches are a pain but they’re far better than the alternative…walking on my foot, shrieking like a little girl, falling down whimpering and then fainting!) and while at least half of the people out there are great, there’s a much larger percentage of assholes than I ever dreamed possible.
There were only two of the little riding carts at the grocery store and I got to the only free one just in time to see a little old lady with one of those walker-dealies start hobbling up. “Hmmm.” thinks I. “This hurts like a motherfucker, but I’m a lot stronger than she looks and I could probably just hop, if need be…she doesn’t look like she can.” So I get out of the cart to give it to her, but as I’ve got my back turned and I’m trying to get th’ damned crutches adjusted, some obese guy (grossly overweight—possible diabetes thing going, maybe?) grabs it. I say “That was mine.” He replies “Yeah, but you got out.” I say “So?” He says “You snooze, you lose” and drives off. Asshole. Regardless of your condition, I’d bet that old lady needed it more. You were able to get to it without crutches or a walker, you dick.
Get the fuck out of the middle of the aisle you morons! I’ve ranted about this when I was non-crippled, it’s worse now. It is possible to make an informed selection between the Cap’n Crunch with Crunchberries and the Cap’n Crunch with Peanut Butter Thingies without taking up the whole aisle. And when a gimpy guy on crutches (in obvious pain) tries to get by and says “Excuse me”, the correct response (actually, regardless of the gimpiness) is “Oh! I beg your pardon!” not “I’ll be done in a sec. Hold your horses.”
I’m moving as lickety-damned-split as I fucking can. Honk at me while I’m trying to cross the parking lot again, and I’ll put my crutch through your windshield.
WATCH WHERE YOU’RE FUCKING GOING! Someone made a U-turn with their cart and ran over my damaged foot. See that bit in the first paragraph about “Shriek like a little girl…”. At least that guy had the decency to apologize profusely. The lady who backed into me, bumping me and making me step on my damaged foot didn’t bother.
How 'bout some courtesy, jerkoffs? I try to find the shortest line, 'cause it hurts to stand and I’m trying to carry a grocery basket while balancing (not easy. Some jerk saw the same line and zipped in front of me. With his shopping cart full of crap. I’ve always let people go ahead of me if they’re injured or if they only have a few items. I know I’m not the only one who does this.
AAargh.
You should see what a lovely, lovely world this’d be
Everyone learned to be polite, ah-hah-unh
Seems to me such an itty bitty thing is courtesy
Why can’t you learn to be nice, day and night?
All the world over, so easy to see
People everywhere seem like assholes to me
I can’t understand it, so simple to do
Show courtesy to me, I’ll be polite to you.
Oh, poor Fenry. (I recognized the thread title. I’m not ooooold, but I’m not young, either.) I’m sorry the assholes of the world are making life so difficult when you’re already in pain.
FWIW, I always give my place in line when I think it’s warranted (old or injured, people with a few items, etc.)
I’m with you 100%, except for one tiny thing. I might be tempted to shove a person on crutches into a display of soupcans in order to get ahead of them in line . Other then that I’m with you, I hope you feel better.
Sorry about your foot, Fenris. Hope it heals quickly.
I’ve been on crutches once in my life, in college. Nobody ever told me about the horrible, horrible bruises you can develop under your arms through persistent crutch use. There were days it was a tossup – did I want to further damage my knee or my armpits?
I thought your title was to the tootsie pop theme. I feel like that SNL where Father and Daughter can now get along because they can sing their favorite songs together on a new album of commercial songs.
“Hey, it’s the Nike Theme! Cool Dad!” (The Nike Theme being Revolution by the Beatles.)
Disclaimer: I am neither Fenris’ Father, or daughter.
Where do you live that this takes place? It’s funny, but not funny. I don’t understand how you managed to make it through any of those experiences, with access to two large wooden blunt objects, and not wind up in jail.
Been there – well, sort of. My mom once had to use a wheelchair for awhile after knee surgery, and once I came this close to taking the head of an employee at the local Imax who referred to her as “the wheelchair.”
She also has a lovely story of waiting for a cab in the rain in Washington DC on crutches; when a cab finally pulled up, several incredibly rude women practically shoved her out of the way and hogged the cab for themselves.
It’s for times like this Fenris that everyone should know a little bojutsu (Japanese Staff Fighting) there are all sorts of wonderfully painful places you can accidentily stick your crutch whilst howeling in pain when some jerk knocks into you.I might suggest for starters about two inches above the inside ankle pushing outwards and towards the heel, nice crumpling ankle effect if you get it right, or just a pianfull ankle scab if you get it wrong.
Sorry to hear about your sore foot Fenris. I hope you have a speedy recovery. People who block whole freakin’ aisle in the grocery should be shot of sight. Try not to take a life over the next few days.
What grocery store were you at? It sounds like some strange corner of the universe where every asshole in the world comes to shop. Do they give discounts for being a shithead?
Hope you feel better. And I’d shop elsewhere, for your own sanity.
Having spent a fair number of my teenage years walking with a cane, and then spending weeks in a wheelchair and on crutches while recovering from the surgery that lets me do without the cane about 360 days out of the year, I am well aware of what freakin’ assholes people can be.
Here’s a hint, if someone gets on the bus with her arms full of books and a heavy backpack, trying to hold on to the rail and her cane and the books at the same time while not blocking the aisles with the backpack and not putting weight on her bad knee … maybe, just maybe she could use a seat more than you.
I have also had someone point at my cane, say something to his friends, and then the group of them busted out laughing. That still makes me angry. The fuckers. :mad:
I’m an asshole
I’m an asshole
I’m an asshole
O’dee’Oh
I park in handicapped spaces
While handicapped people
Make handicapped Faces
I’m an asshole
I’m an asshole
I’m an asshole
O’dee’Oh
)
. Other then that I’m with you, I hope you feel better.