I know jack all about Warhammer, is this a test?
If the goal is to make babies, I don’t think the internet will help… unless the alien’s uteri (uteruses?) are on their faces…
You’re fucking blond jesus after a sex change?
Yeah i guess it wouldn’t have worked out anyway Rabbi beards look like they tickle to kiss.
Would that be a GUI interface?
I have a co-worker who has said, over the course of several dinner dates:
“Those damn Jews…”
“Those stupid Paki’s…” (Pakistani’s? she’s from Mombai)
“Numerology is the only true science.”
The dinner dates were discontinued.
Sorry to use a tattered meme but you gotta admit that’s a great band name.
To anyone who does know the 40k tourny scene, this is lunacy. There has never been a Grand Tournament in Alaska, and Games Workshop has never given out cash awards to winners, much less an incredible amount like $40k.
Shhh! That’s the big secret. Lou Reed was a high-level initiate and “Walk on the Wild Side” is a coded message that’ll blow the roof off the Vatican!
(please sprinkle bolding, excessive exclamation marks, and random font changes throughout this post for authenticity)
You shit me not?
That’s just what the government wants you to say! Over dramatic text dulls sense and placates the masses!!!
Ever have one of those “stop the world, I want to get off, because the people here are freaking retarded” moments? I’ve had a few of them at my office. Here’s a recent one…
We have a woman in our office who’s reasonably competent, aged 30 or so, who talks about The Lord every bloody chance she gets. It drives many of us up a blasted wall, but people are afraid to confront her about her inappropriate preachifying. Anyway, one day this lunatic, who, by the way, truly believes people can speak in tongues, but only Christians, violently pushed a guy away from her cubicle because she saw him staring at the fish-shaped magnet on her file cabinet drawer door. One HR investigation later, she still works here, he doesn’t.
Dammit! I just got my brain back from the shop and here you people go breaking it again!
Grooooooooooooooooooooan.
Alas, my coworkers are largely sane and either always have been or have always hidden it well. So I have no cool stories to share.
I met a man once, not a friend, or even a friend of a . . . He maintained that when you went faster than the speed of sound, if you talked, it would come out backwards!
I don’t know if he felt it would be produced backwards, or be somehow “flipped around” after you spoke.
I couldn’t even think of where to begin to refute it, but no one in the place when he started up on it seemed to be likely to fall for it. He really seemed sincere.
Comic books, and poor reading skills, I imagine. Like superman, you know, but real.
Tris
My FIL believes that the Democratic party(everywhere, in all states and nationally) is 100% pure corruption; that the teacher’s union has connived with the schools and the privately owned driver’s ed schools to stop providing behind the wheel to HS kids, in order to provide more jobs (it doesn’t make any sense to me either), that Bush and Cheney et al, if they were just given a chance would show everyone that their way is Right. Oh, and if you don’t have a BM everyday, the “toxins” will build up and kill you (or at least make you sick). This last one is more generational than anything else, but it adds a certain something to our conversations.
I don’t talk to him about much except the weather.
–ahem-- We’re waiting… ???
ETA: elanorigby, does he mostly discuss his shitstorms? 
Hmmm compared you some of you… I got nuttin’.
I Do, however have co workers who think my boss is qualified, just, and fair.
So, yeah I do work with some strange ones.
No, darling. But if I hear one more time how his gastroenterologist has told him he has the LARGEST colon of any pt he’s ever seen, I may puke. (people think that nurses like to hear this stuff. We don’t). He’s very proud of his large colon. May god have mercy on us all.
It’s unique to most professions. When I was an active EMT, anyone I would transport became my bestest pal for a while. Or, had the potential to.
People would walk up to me in the supermarket and launch into a detailed description of how it all went at the hospital. Not all people. But you know… MORE than I would wish to have do it.
And honey, might I just add, may god have mercy on you. You’re his daughter. Don’t you lie there at night wondering if you might in fact have the largest colon in your generation ???
Ah, but I don’t have cats anymore, so I’m exempt from the rule. 
NO I’M NOT. He’s my FIL, thank the merciful angels in heaven (not sure why I’m talking like this). He was born and reared in rural Ohio in the Depression and made 35 cents an hour doing construction and odd jobs. I blame asbestos exposure.