Wait, she thinks it’s live?
Yep. Even after I explained to her that it’s not, and could not possibly be.
FWIW, this is the same woman who never heard of the word “kosher”, but thought that being a “rabbi” sounded like a really cool job, and wondered where she could apply for it.
She’s about as Catholic as one could get.
Good for her she’s cute.
This is one of those times that I am so everfucking grateful that I work with all engineers. They’re sane. Odd, but sane.
Now if you want to talk whackjobs, let me introduce you to a few people at the bar… :rolleyes:
Are you to tell me that people who have been sipping potent potables might spout some irrationalities? Say it ain’t so!
OK, there was this one guy who figured out horse racing, and had a system where you couldn’t possibly lose a bet. It was a sure-fire win. He just hadn’t used it yet, which is why he asked me to buy him his next beer.
I cannot even fathom conversations with this guy regarding politics. " Abortion is murder! I’m a Knight Templar."
I know a guy who says that it is the power of prayer that has a protective sheild over America and because of a lack of faith is why 9/11.
This gem is my BIL.
You apparently don’t work with software or network engineers.
ShibbOleth - Google “Chemtrails”, your nut isn’t alone.
Queuing - The problem with these people is not finding out that they’re crazy, it’s getting them to shut up about it. My crazy dude would bring in his books and babble for hours about the aliens and the gold fringe around the flag being an indication of Martial Law and not paying income tax.
Lucky for me whenever I say anything crazy, it sounds like I’m joking
It is, kinda. There was a bit of a thrill I’d get when I read stories of alien abductions and ghost sightings. I miss it. Not enough to fool myself into believing horseshit, but I miss it nonetheless.
I feel so deprived. When I was working I wasn’t aware of any nutjobs with wacky world views in my office.
Of course, that could be explained by the fact that I had as little personal contact with them as possible. Although there was never anything particularly strange in the loud conversations that I could help overhearing. Unless you count the woman who, when asked how she was, always responded by shouting at the top of her lungs, “I’m Blessed!”
I used to work with a guy who left Chick tracts in the bathrooms and thought Solomon built the Great Pyramid. He had a book that proved it and everything, he brought it to work and showed me. Unfortunately my mind has blocked out the title and author, I just remember it had a lot of unnecessarily capitalized and italicized words and way too many apostrophes.
Most of my current co-workers are mostly sane. There is one, she prays a lot (I don’t care, as long as she gets her work done first and doesn’t pester us to join her) and only buys her gasoline from British Petroleum because she doesn’t want to support Al Qaeda. But she brings us cake.
I’ve only got a coworker who believes that HIV is God’s way of punishing the homosexuals.
My mom had a better one when she worked for the IT dept of the county government. While attempting to work on a woman’s PC, she asked if the woman minded if she moved the manilla folder that was sitting in front of the tower. The woman replied, “Oh, that’s fine. I just put that there so Intel wouldn’t watch me.” She seriously believed that the “Intel inside” was some sort of spy that could be stymied by heavy paper.
Just don’t try to tell me where you hid the Holy Grail and about your mystical struggle against the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn and it’s all good.
I once worked with a lady who thought aliens were really angels in disguise. Sinners saw the angels as big headed, big eyed freaks while the beautiful people (what she called ‘saved’ folks) saw angels. Also, if you didn’t welcome/greet the angels everyday, they’d go back and tell lies to Jesus about you.
Then there was the “Bethlahem is encapsulated and frozen under the North Pole” (that other place you can visit is just a poser for the Jews). She said that the angels would put the real place back when Jesus came back so he wouldn’t have culture shock. I guess it would be anti-climatic for him to get run over by a car his first day back.
The best I can do is a fellow cuberat that wants me to try accupuncture and take collodial silver.
All my coworkers seem to be sane, the only real nutbag I’ve met was a guy at the gaming store I frequent. I play Warhammer 40k there every Monday night, and this new guy came in and wanted to play. Just listening to him hurt my brain. Over the course of the game I learned that:
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Hillary Clinton gave a speech to his military unit, part of which said that she favored abortions for ‘troubled’ girls up to three months after birth. I had him repeat this last bit.
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Almost 1 million votes from military personel overseas were talied for Kerry in the last presidential election, including his own, when they should have gone to Bush. The number he gave was 980,000.
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Six of seven women who attend the Univeristy of Alaska Fairbanks will be raped, and this number is not reported by the university. The majority of them are not officially reported, and they are mainly perpetrated by native Alaskans.
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Native Alaskans leave their dead out for Ravens and/or crows to eat, on tall wooden platforms, because they believe the ravens carry the spirit of the deceased to heaven. The guy said he was fined $8,000 for hitting a raven with his car, because of thier spiritual beliefs.
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He spent 12 hours a day in Iraq wearing a rad suit guarding a large building containing weapons grade uranium. He said that this uranium had been bonded with carbon so that its radiation signature could not be detected by satellite while it was being moved to Syria where it would be made into nuclear weapons. When UN forces showed up the building was emptied in secret.
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He has photographs of Iraqi trucks carrying chemical weapons, and chemical weapons refining equipment. He claimed that Iraq had huge amounts of chemical weapons availabe in the second gulf war, in moving trucks. A group of trucks would each do part of the process necessary in creating the chemical, VX and Sarin, and then meet up with a transport truck that would take the now completely refined chemical to a weapons facility.
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Older version Russian Migs were found that had modified droptanks, designed to hold alcohol and a powder, ie: chemical weapon dispersion.
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He took second in the Warhammer 40k Alaska Grand Tournament, for which he won $40,000. He used an Imperial Guard army, and lost 1st place to a Tau army that had lots of Forgeworld models.
Dude you should offer to explain how to be a rabbi over dinner, some place nice and romantic!
Unless she’s annoying in which case don’t.
You’d be lucky to get an abbacus for me. For quad-core PCs or plasma TVs, you need to trade someone like Paris Hilton or Ron Jeremy. Aliens can learn a lot from them.
I’m writing an erotic novel about hiding my Templar sword in a Holy Grail. There’ll be some “Golden Dawns”, if you know what I mean (If so, please tell me)
Her new husband might object. Besides, I don’t date pregnant women.
Place I used to work we had Conspiracy Carl. He believed in all the biggies: UFOs, mind control rays, Bigfoot, prehistoric sea creatures (including the one in Lake Michigan). This Pope is the penultimate one because of the prophecies of St. Malachy and the world will end in 2012 because of the Mayan calendar predictions. Blah, blah, blah. Talking with him was like a bad combo of Dan Akroyd’s character from Sneakers with Mel Gibson’s character from Conspiracy Theory.
For fun we would try to come up with bizarre stuff to see if he would believe it. “Did you know that Hurricane Katrina was caused by the Chinese government as part of a weather control experiment? They were trying to figure out the proper way to make it rain so they could flush the smog from their skies before the Olympics and it went out of control. And, of course, Dubya refused to allow rescue operations to come in because he wanted to see just how effective a weapon it would be.”
On the day I got laid off from that job as part of a RIF, he started telling me about how the economy was crashing, that it could take over 6 months to find a job and that I should stock up on gold, precious metals and non-perishable items before total anarchy sets in. I told him that I was already in a rotten mood from getting laid off and I didn’t need to hear anymore of his lunacy. He tried to tell me more and I just said to him, “Shut the fuck up. You are the laughing stock of this entire company. We all think you are out of your fucking mind because you will believe any load of crap that the Weekly World News publishes.” Yes, he thinks Bat Boy is real.
Oh, I know. She likes to mention how that there are a few other brave souls out there who have thwarted the evil government influences. She monitors and chats with them.
Did you know that the bridge collapse was the “grey terrorism” work of the Russians, who want to screw up commerce in the good ol’ USofA? Almost all commerce, apparently, flows down the Mississippi, and this will disrupt interstate commerce for months. An “expert” talked about it soon afterwards, as did an expert on Russian grey terrorism, who knows that they possess seismic weapons that can initiate shock waves that will bring down and already weakened structure without alerting the masses. The US Government is hip to this, but also doesn’t want us to “know” what is going on.
Also, of course “THEY” do a lot of this stuff. “THEY” are not defined, but we know who “THEY” are.