Yes. You asked.
Ahhh, Shodan it’s nice to see some things never change. In all things in all ways no matter how many years have passed since I’ve read your inane drivel you don’t change no matter the topic. You are that most elusive of creatures: wrong in every way on every day. I swear you surpass lekat or libertarian…
Just… this. I am extremely fucking direct in relationships. It’s actually an issue in my family because passive aggressive bullshit is sort of their bread and butter (arguably that is why I am the way I am… I have seen 1,000 examples of How to Destroy a Relationship.) If I have a problem, you’re gonna know about it. If I want something specific from you, you’re gonna hear about it. If you ask me how I’m doing, I’m going to tell you. The thing is, very few things raise my ire enough to be thought of as legitimate ‘‘problems.’’ I realize this may not come across very well on the internet, but I am extremely laid back and patient in my personal relationships.
The last time I went home for vacation it reminded me how fucking exhausting it is to deal with people like that. I remember saying to my Aunt (who is much like me) ''Why can’t it be this easy for the rest of our family?" Seriously, our relationship is so fucking easy. With everyone else it’s just crazy ass drama all the time.
Case in point, when I visited my Mom, I had a conversation about our past with her that lasted a full hour, in front of her partner. She was asking me questions and as far as I could tell we were just having a conversation about the past. Mutual healing. Then at like 3am that morning I get an angry text from her that said, ''Why do you have to bring up all that shit around my boyfriend? I don’t want to talk about it!" And then all this other stuff about how I was like trashing her or something (in her mind, honesty about the past = trashing her) and trying to make her feel bad. NONE of that was in evidence.
And I was like, I’ll be damned if I’m going to apologize when you sat there and talked to me about it for an hour without even coming close to hinting that the subject matter was making you uncomfortable. Sorry, no. I told her that, too. I told her I wasn’t out to get her, I was just having a conversation, and if she had a problem with it she should have told me right then. I told her I wasn’t sorry but that I would respect her desire to not discuss those issues moving forward.
I don’t know what’s so hard about direct communication. I really don’t. When I read about cultures where there is really heavy emphasis on indirect communication - like Japan, for instance, I really think I would tear my fucking hair out if I had to deal with that all the time.
SAY WHAT THE FUCK YOU MEAN. Your relationships will improve 100%, I promise.
Sorry, I just had to get that off my chest.
Didn’t we hash this out two months ago?