American Idol, 1/13/09

Oh it’s worse than you think. There is a gap in time of many weeks between the initial cast-of-thousands audition cycle and the Simon-Paula-Randy-Cara auditions. During that time the contestants (good and bad alike) are being told that they are “just what we are looking for” by lower level producers, while the film crews show up at their homes and film the human interest stories. So, when they do show up for the real audition, they have been given positive reinforcement by industry professionals. Needless to say, when the truth comes out for the untalented, it is a bigger shock than it has to be.

Great television, ain’t it?

I think they probably are careful (because of lawyers and shit) to pick folks who are weird, but not that weird. I imagine they must say “you’re very unique” or “has anyone ever told you that you can sing” and stuff like that. There’s a fine line between entertainment and being cruel, and as much as people enjoy losers getting berated, they can’t go too far. Plus I’m sure they don’t want someone going Pearl Jam Jeremy on them after being dissed too hard.

So, you haven’t heard about Pauler’s number one fan yet.

All the more reason for them to be extra careful.

I don’t think they know yet, because remember Mandisa? I may be remembering it wrong, but didn’t she get Simon to apologize during Hollywood week because she saw the episode where he made fun of her weight after she left the room?

I don’t know, I guess maybe the timing of that might be just too close? When is Hollywood week filmed compared to the top 24 (or however many they are going with this year)?

I’m glad there are some other people who think Kara came off like a total bitch during the Bikini Girl segment. Yes, Bikini Girl is not nearly as pretty and talented as she seems to think she is, and I (like everyone else in America) cannot wait to watch her go down in flames. But Kara (and Pauler) decided to hate Bikini Girl the minute she strutted through the door, talent or not. And then Kara tried to out-sing Bikini Girl under the ridiculous pretense of “showing her how it’s done.” OK, we get it, you can sing. It was a total ploy to focus the spotlight on herself and her awesomeness, but she looked like a washed-up diva desperate for attention. As snotty as Bikini Girl was, I laughed my ass off when she said, “Well, your version wasn’t much better.” HA! The look on Kara’s face was priceless.

One last thing to add to my Kara Hate Diatribe. Calling a contestant a bitch (however true it may be) on camera is unprofessional as hell.

Heh. Castro was baked.

I didn’t know Simon had ever written any songs. He shouldn’t write any more. That was horrible.

I loved Castro. He was so dreamy-- smokey— something like that.

I like what Cara said to the girl who couldn’t sing. “You are a pretty girl but singing is not your thing.”

My daughter who sang Randy’s song looks like Leona Lewis. I didn’t know Leona Lewis had a big nose but apparently she does.

Another one of those awful pop country warblers. They shouldn’t be allowed on the show.

I’m really enjoying seeing so many more who get to Hollywood. And they aren’t skimping on the stinkers. I see a lot less of the mentally disturbed.

The last guy might actually be able to sing if he would just cut it the fuck out with the OTT belting and melisma.

Loud equals good now?

I like him better than his brother.

I cannot believe Castro’s brother is calling Jason girly. Is he being sarcastic or something. Mike’s only getting in because his brother did. He did not deserve it.

Wow. Castro’s brother is pretty good. He couldn’t look more different, though.

I now wish I would have watched last season. That Castro is hot stuff!

Hat guy needs to learn when not to turn it up to 11 and he’ll be good.

Baby Castro is half-decent. Not sure whether or not to believe him about only starting to sing 20 days before the audition. If that’s true, he’s pretty awesome.

Fairly impressed with Matt the Welder. I don’t get why Randy didn’t like him.

I think single Dad is not attractive enough to go far. He may make up for it in heartwarming backstory.

Oh no! Has AI made me cynical?