American Idol - Finale

Cafe Society
141

No idea what the relationship is twixt them (he does seem to care for him) but I definitely got the “one hand tied behind his back” vibe from him. The romantic (which I don’t mean in the sexual sense but in ‘the part of me that romanticizes things’ sense) certainly hopes he loves Archuleta as that kid just seems so sad for somebody so on top of the world; he actually depresses me- I mean, he’s 17, has millions of fans, a very lucrative recording contract dangling before him either way- and does he seem like he enjoys it at all? When he smiles while singing it seems it’s on cue.

That said, tomorrow night he’ll probably be crowned and reveal himself to be a modern incarnation of the omnipotent brat from Twilight Zone. It’ll turn out his father’s lived in fear of him for 17 years and now he’ll breed with his groupies and take over the world with a superspawn. Or worse, he’ll sing Imagine one more time.

142

OK just one more and I’m going to bed, honest.

I am starting to get pissed at the the show for what seems to be deliberately fucking with David A.'s head.

One of my co-workers earlier mentioned a rumor that the producers wanted Cook to win, and set up David A. to fail. First they wouldn’t let Arch have a song he wanted (apparently he wanted to do “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” and he mentions in the above-linked interview difficulty in getting a song). And the arrangement of songs for the night put his strongest first (true) and his weakest last (also true), which had the opposite effect on David C. (true again). Remember, I heard this all before the show aired. I also think the judges - or at least Simon - were encouraged to comment in the ways they did to ensure that the David C. fans took a break from their crossword puzzles and dissertation proposals to vote.

This is all unsubstantiated rumor, but it rings true - they didn’t have to arrange the songs that way. In fact, I thought they usually do the glurgey fanwank songs last, which would have favored Archie, instead of the singer’s choice. Whether or not it was ISHFWILF, if Arch had trouble getting the song he wanted, Imagine may have been a last-minute desperate choice.

So all of this is just dirty pool, whatever, but what’s upsetting to me is that I fear David A. isn’t savvy enough to figure that out, and may have taken his overpraise/DC’s overcriticism too much to heart, and could be crushed by the likely outcome. Or, almost worse, sees the ugly manipulation behind the scenes and realizes that this unstoppable machine wants a certain winner, and knows what to do to get “the people” (baaa) to do their bidding. I don’t suppose American Idol is anyone’s model for true democracy, but for a naive kid, it could be really disheartening. Not to mention an emotional wringer, if he’s really thinking he is getting a win out of this.

Not to say that Archie would have, or should have, won if everything were dead honest, but the whole thing feels suspect. Which is also unfair to David C., who deserves to win on his own merits, on an even playing field.

143

Cowell does see it. He has been quoted at least once (EW, a couple weeks ago) saying Cook is the most talented in the competition and he hopes he wins.

Now I’m reeeeeally going to bed!

144

No he wouldn’t. He’s always talking about the “It” factor and that it’s more than a singing competition and blahblah. He’s admitted to contestants that they are the superior singer but that they can’t compete with a lesser singer’s performances.

David C. has It. David A., regardless of his singing talents, does not. Simon would have to be dead blind to not see that hence my “liar” comment earlier.

He’s full of shit.

145

Day-um…it’s like an election, isn’t it? All the hype and glamor and twists and turns and raging opinions back and forth. At first it’s exciting, but then as weeks go by and arguments get rehashed and re-rehashed, it gradually morphs into unhappy tedum. And on and on and on it goes, weeks becoming months, until we’ve all but competely lost our grip on reality, and the discussions get ugly, and with all the drama exhausted, a lot of us are just praying for this damn thing to END, dammit.

Sheesh…two people in the final just doesn’t work…four…minimum of four…damn*.

Folks, let’s not kid ourselves…in terms of final vote and long-term career prospects, the advantage goes to Archuelta. It’s not just teen girls; it’s old folks (an all too often ignored market with plenty of disposable income), easy listening fans, country fans, heck, pretty much the same market as at least six other contestants this season. And besides his record deal he has the previously-mentioned stage avenues, promotions, tours, you name it. Rock, especially alternative rock, is always a crapshoot, and while Cook will probably make it at least fairly big, nothing is guaranteed. Where is Bo Bice now? He’s had some successes, but nothing on the level of, say, Vertical Horizon.

C’mon, who’s the enormous success story, the one great singing idol to come out of this? Kelly Clarkson, as harmless and vanilla and lily-white a performer as I’ve ever seen. Soul man Reuben Studdard went absolutely nowhere, rags-to-riches story Fantasia Barrino is still fighting madly for relevance, and show stopper Taylor Hicks just plain said the hell with it.

The true success story will emerge. It always does. In the meantime, let’s all step back, take some deep breaths, and regain some perspective.

(As for the performances, I think Archuleta was just doing his best not to screw up and Cook realized that the battle was over and coasted. I didn’t find fault with any of them.)

P.S.: When we can’t even agree on which direction Simon Cowell is trying to pull the voters, it’s a safe assumption that he’s not going to have much success either way.

  • And just for the record, I think Syesha Mercado and Jason Castro in boxing gear would’ve been funny as hell. :slight_smile:
146

I have to disagree. I see very poor album sales and even poorer concert venues for Archuletta. He’s exhausted his repertoire already. We’ve seen what he can do and more than about 15 minutes of it would be excruciatingly too much. Cook on the other hand could easily front a band and carry a 2 hour concert. I know personally a number of people who would buy his album. Hell I bought his self-released album off of Amazon! If he gets some radio airplay there will be demand, and he’s interesting enough on stage to command a performance worth watching.

Maybe once Archie grows up, learns not to sing through his nose, learns to follow melodies and not just morph them all into the same melismatic note sequence… maybe when his stage presence is more than bouncing up and down and looking like he’s about to have some serious incontinence issues… maaaaaybe he could pull it off… but he’s so amazingly bland that even so I still doubt it. I think his career lies behind the scenes doing Soundtracks for animated movies.

147

I honestly don’t think they did. It looked pretty much the same when he was on Star Search. It’s just kind of naturally small and beady eyed and simian.

148

Ah, and PS- What was that Sun-Tzu meets Palpatine at Donald Trump’s garden party nonsense of Simon’s about how “you have to really want to win and you have to hate your opponent?” I’m not the least bit Pollyannaish, but that’s just utter bullshit; the “have to want it” part, true enough, but there have been real boxing matches and for that matter bloody wars fought between men who didn’t * hate* each other. Is he trying to sound all “they’ve got the eye of the tiger” dark or just making for interesting TV or what?

149

Much like these AI threads — well, once people became fans, and switched from making fun of one guy’s head to making fun of the other’s. Cook is going to win, just as Simon predicted.

150

I’m not kidding myself, and no he doesn’t.

The proof of the pudding is in the eating. Let’s watch David A launch a huge crossover career. Feel free to invest in him if you like. I wouldn’t bet on anyone remembering him in five years.

I thought it was Carrie Underwood, but

Doesn’t need to be amended.

151

Ugh, ugh, ugh.

I feel bad, hating Davie A so much. I mean, he’s just a kid, having the unbelievable adventure of his life. But… GAH!

How hypocritical, for him to say he “connects” so much with Imagine, and then he has to skip the entire first half of the song, lest something bad about religion cross his (constantly- and creepily-licked) lips.

And seriously, I thought Melinda Doolitle’s humble nature last year was grating, but Archie makes me wish my TV had a neck just so I could throttle it. “Oh my gosh! Thank you so much! Oh my gosh! Wow! Gosh! Oh my gosh! Thank you!”

That being said, he does seem like a nice kid and I wish him a successful career singing on Nickelodeon. Just keep him off of my TV.

What a loss of creditability for AI, huh? I could actually see how someone could call this a close race, and say that it was difficult to pick one David over the other. But the way that the judges bowed before David A all night made it SO obvious that they want manipulate the audience into voting for him. Disappointing.

Either way it goes, I’ll be waiting for Cook’s first album.

152

I can’t help but feel maternal towards David A. He genuinely seems like a nice kid but looks completely overwhelmed by the whole experience. I wonder how much of the over-the-top love from the judges is a m/paternal need to protect him from his nutcase father. As far as selling albums (or should we say “iTunes”), it appears that pre-teens dig him. That’s all he needs in this country to enjoy enormous success. Remember that Miley Cyrus is a billionaire with a ‘b’. At least David has actual talent. (I just hope he doesn’t lose his virginity to some 45 year old groupie.)

David Cook has maturity, wisdom and (apparently) a solid family base behind him. He might lose the competition, but as they say, he’s won the race already.

153

Those contest-winner songs were terrible. David Cook’s sounded like it should have been on the soundtrack to Iron Eagle.

I, too, was surprised at how the judges were fawning over Archie so much last night. I was thinking that their reasoning was that Cook is selling records no matter what, but Archie’s career is better served with the tag, “American Idol Winner”.

And now from the “sometimes I feel like I’m on a different planet” files. . .some of you actually VOTE?

. . .and admit it?

. . .what are you DOING?

Do you realize there are 30 million people voting? Give it a rest.

154

I haven’t read the thread yet, but I wanted to mention last night was so boring it took me less than 15 minutes to fast forward through the whole thing. I gather the judges preferred Archuleta or said they did anyway.

155

Historically Archuleta would have to compete with singers like Perry Como . Johnny Mathis. and Sinatra. Crooners that really could not bring the rock. That is why a Xmas album would be about right for him. But he pales in comparison. A album by him would get more and more boring. At a concert of his you would start looking at your watch. He has no staying power and sings unemotionally. He just makes a pleasant noise.

156

Tivoed Simon on “Ellen” and he picked Cook to win. As did Ellen. (Note: This was before the finale.) They both said that Archuleta has been groomed from an early age to do this and as such lacks charisma and life experience necessary to connect with the music. Simon said that he prefers people who’ve been trained in a bar. (I think he loves Karly.)

Oh, and 15 years ago Simon was living with his parents and had $7.00 in his pocket.

157

I interpreted that as a moment of delightfully eviscerating sarcasm from Cowell aimed at Seacrest’s nearly impenetrable talk show hide. “This is a dumbass theme and you’ve asked me a dumbass question and here’s your dumbass answer, you dumbass, are ya happy?” As such, I kind of enjoyed it.

158

I found this article that speaks to some of the issues “stage children” deal with. Interesting!

159

Does anyone know if there will be studio singles released from last night’s performance? I must have the Collective Soul song!!!

160

It seems like a slightly more constructive use of 40 seconds than composing a condescending post to anonymous strangers on the Internet who do it.