To Alphagene with love.
Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, dogs are from Pluto.
She was just on the chat the other night
Magnificent to behold - Greatly to be praised.
Can I take this opportunity to tell Alphagene how much I dig his superior wit?
This is why he gets free tickets to fancy sporting events.
Formerly unknown as “Melanie”
. . . Plus, he has such big brown puppy-dog eyes . . .
Plus he has those lesbian creation powers.
pat
Actually, Flo, he has green eyes. But we won’t get into those right now.
Pricciar, are you following Flora around?
Formerly unknown as “Melanie”
It certainly looks that way. I think thats five posts in a row now.
Let me go find my stalker hat.
pat
I said stalker hat not stockings. These don’t even fit me.
By the way folks, this is in reference to a typical wise-ass response I made in this thread.
You know it’s the genuine love, attention to detail and awareness of other people’s sensitivities that makes me come back MPSIMS again and again.
And subsequently makes me projectile vomit again and again.
Fortunately, Canth, your sarcasm made it a little more palatable. Thanks. Really. 
And Burn, I’m a he. Don’t you remember my plethora of exgirlfriend horror stories? So I must be a guy… or a lesbian with a sense of humor. Which do you think is more likely?
Back off, man. I’m a scientist.
I see <laugh> sorry… <smile>
Magnificent to behold - Greatly to be praised.
I swear, Mel, I did NOT tell pricciar that you and I were rounded up by the Lesbian Recruitment Office in Times Square . . .
Alphagene, that must be the problem, keep your dates away from times square.
pat
I’m sorry. I really, truly am sorry. But I shall not stifle my own creative urges…I simply cannot. So, without further ado, to the tune of ABBA’s “Dancing Queen” (well, the refrain, anyway)…
You are the Alphagene, make us laugh, oh your wit is keen,
Alphagene, catch his post 'bout the MPSIMS scene, ( www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum5/HTML/000349.html )
He can mock, ( www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum5/HTML/000368.html )
He can jibe, ( www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum5/HTML/000396.html )
Gives us the laugh of our lives,
See him flame, ( www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum5/HTML/000387.html )
Watch him preen, ( www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum4/HTML/002335.html )
He is Alphagene!
I pray to the Muses that all my code came out right.
Then he said, “That is that.”
And then he was gone.
-Dr. Seuss, * The Cat in the Hat*
Or at least stop finding them there.
This is getting weirder and weirder. Flora, I’ll see you near Times Square in an hour - and I’m not even joking!
Formerly unknown as “Melanie”
Umm, maybe we should explain that we’re meeting for drinks at the Algonquin after work, we’re not REALLY going to the Lesbian Recruitment Office. You know peoples’ notion about New York . . .
Then again, after an hour or two at the Algonquin, we may decide to hunt up those lesbians after all . . .
After what we’ve been through lately, Flora, we should be going to the Lesbian Recruitment office.
But I’ll see you at the Algonquin shortly! Oh, I invited Cap’n Crude because he sounds very cute.
Manny, Alphie, Ukie, you guys can show up, too, but only after 6:30 please.
Formerly unknown as “Melanie”
Pssht. You two wouldn’t last two seconds as lesbians. You’d look terrible in flannel.
You’ve never heard of lipstick lesbians?
Mel and I had a great hen-party last night, and many ears must have been burning. We are forming The She-Girl Boy-Hater’s Club, and are taking applications for membership.
Burn: Beautiful! ::golf clap::
Flora and Melasaxfacenie: Will you accept less sophisticated, out-of-town members? I could head up the Midwestern chapter.
“…all the prettiest girls live in Des Moines…”
–Jack Kerouac, On the Road