Q: What do you think about when making love?
A: Eating suip with a straw
– suip should be soup, damned dyslexia
What’s a good felching practice exercise?
Say the alphabet while holding your breath.
Q: what occupies your time now that you no longer play hockey?
A: Three bears, a bicycle, and some raisinettes
Q: What do you think about when masturbating
A: The Straight Dope moderators, in a jakuzi.
Q. How do you make a arrogant-jerk stew? 
A. Its slippery when wet.
:: covers his face in shame and hides under the bed ::
How is a tile floor like an oiled up cabana boy?
It feels good to walk on in bare feet.
Q. What are you doing to Suzanne Sommers dimply ass?
A. I used to, but then my toe fell off.
Q: Have you ever had a Japanese Samurai pedicure?
A: It cured my athletes foot and my Haemeroids.
Q: Ever drag an appendage on the grass?
A: Cedar shavings and some hand lotion.
Q: What do I needed to make Falafel?
A: Pulses are not optional.
Q: Can’t people just choose to make their hearts stop beating?
A: Put them in the blender and mix at high speed for ten seconds
Q.yes doctor, I understand my grandparents are out of their minds… but what should I do with them??
A. I’m sorry, I wasn’t able to stop catch it.
Q: “Harry Potter, why did you let the golden snitch get away”
A: Because I’m a tosspot little twerp.
Q: Bippy, why have you posted about 100 times in this thread?
A: One.
Q: How many big macs can you eat in 30 seconds?
A: In my car, with the windows down.
Q: Where do you hide when the cops are after you?
A: William Shakespeare
What’s the best way to eat a chili cheese slaw dog with extra onions?
I prefer a Big Gulp and a bag of salt and vinegar potato chips.
Q: Who was the most famous gay writer in history?
A: Watching “The Bridges of Madison County” with my girlfriend.