Isn’t it ironic that 99% of the replies are straight/bisexual women? And now a gay man is going to say:
No. I don’t do it. I don’t like it. It hurts. And that, for me, is a turn-off.
Ironic, no?
Now excuse me while I slip into my AIDS-Educator nanny-cap…
Be careful of the baby-oil. Unless you’re doing it with a long-term absolutely monogamous partner, you should be using a condom. Period. And if you’re using a condom, you shouldn’t be using petroleum products, which baby oil is. Petroleum eats away latex, weakening the condom and causing microholes which are plenty big enough for the HIV virus to get through.
Be safe and use a waterbased lube…K-Y or Astroglide or something similar.
Anal sex is a very easy way to transfer HIV. There’s almost always some tissue damage because of the smaller diameter of the channel. So please be careful.
Another gay man who doesn’t care for anal sex, unless the guy I’m with really has his technique down. I’ve had overly-enthusiastic men hurt me, so I tend not to do it. However, the right guy can really rock my world. There was this muscular guy from Alabama I met during Mardi Gras…
Here comes jarbaby…I bet she has something bold to say ho ho!
[sub]um[/sub]
Here’s where I stop talking the big game and say, blushing, it scares me.
I’ve never done that…I’ve gotten right to the edge…and have told myself YES, tonight with the anal…and then I scramble away and get all shy about it. It sounds so sexy to me…and I have nothing against it, and I like reading about it or…um…watching it…but I just can’t do it.
I think I’m screwy. :: cough :: I mean, I’ve had…other things used [sub]boy this is hard, why am I doing this?[/sub], but never…The Big Bopper, if you know what I mean.
I don’t know. I suppose I’ll have to do it soon. I mean, lord, I’m going to be 29, and I have this ‘sex oriented’ reputation to live up to here…
jarbaby
Goddess help me, I’ve tried like the devil to get fucked, but it just isn’t happening. It always kills. Only one guy has ever been able to fuck me so far. I really want it, but it’s difficult for me!
It’s also difficult for me to fuck a guy, because the preparations, playing around, stretching him, lubing him up, putting on the condom, etc. last so long that I lose my erection. I’d rather have a good blowjob. Or use a dildo on him! As Lea Delaria once said, “How long can you stay hard? My dick’s hard right now - it’s at home in a box!”
I used to do it quite frequently with a not-so-well-endowed boyfriend and enjoyed it tremedously. My husband, on the other hand, is quite large (especially in girth, as previously mentioned) and we have done it perhaps 20 times over the six years we’ve been together. I have noticed that I tend to be a lot braver if I’ve had a few beers. We had a killer weekend once when I was taking Percocet for a dental problem, too.
Technique is key. Guys tend to get way psyched up about it that way, and sometimes forget what they’re doing. Ouch.
I’m not quite sure why I’m sharing this with you all, but o well. Here goes…
I’ve tried it once and only once with my current boyfriend. We were in the shower and already covered head to toe with Hershey’s chocolate syrup (he’s got this messy fetish. We were already doing it doggy style and he asked to try anal. I figured if we’re already covered in chocolate syrup, then anal sex is nothing compared to that. My boyfriend is an average size (not too big, but not small by any means), so I didn’t think any preparation was needed. Boy was I wrong. He got about half way in when I practically screamed for him to take it out. For at least 15 minutes afterward, I felt like I had just pooped out a bowling ball. I actually thought I was bleeding.
I’ve heard from several people that anal sex can be quite pleasurable, so I’ll probably try it again. Next time, though, I’ll be sure to use loads of lube.
jayjay, I am in a longterm monogamous relationship (I’d never do it with a one-nighter, or even part time lover, ever) and we are both tested and negative. But yeah, I agree, if you are not 100% sure of your partner, use condoms and water-based lube. I don’t want to spread any ignorance here.
My apologies, Soda. I didn’t mean to imply that you, personally, were doing anything stupid. Your mention of baby oil just set off the warning sirens in my brain and I wanted to get that information onto this thread.
I’ve done it with two previous partners, and enjoyed it. I’ve given it, too (But, Tansu, you have no penis. How can this be?) using a latex strap on dildo. He really liked that. We tended to snort amyl nitrate to get our arses nice and relaxed. I find it difficult to dilate without the use of poppers, but maybe with practise, I’d get better at it.
I like the warm happy buzzing feeling that I get after anal sex, or, indeed, after a particularly good crap.
Like many of the gay guys here so far, I’d have to say that it’s much more fun to fantasize about than to actually do.
As matt_mcl pointed out, the mechanics involved in preparation are complex and unromantic. And the actual act itself isn’t very pleasurable for me, either giving or receiving.
My heart’s in the right place, but apparently my prostate is not.
jayjay, there’s absolutely no need to apologize. I really shouldn’t have recommended baby oil without saying what you so eloquently added.
Speaking of giving, I often joke about getting a dildo out for my bf. He always panics, and I suppose it’s mean, but I like teasing him about his double-standards. “But it’s not the same!” he whines. I love teasing him about it, but frankly, I wouldn’t want to do it to him, whether he wanted to or not. I’m afraid I’ll not respect him afterwards. Hey, I stuck a dildo up his ass! (That was ironic, folks.)
{Discussion of how much more convenient it would be if the prostate was, say, just between the upper palate and the nasal cavity deleted for purposes of good taste…}
Because I’ve experienced a few men who were very inept, when I was single, the first time would always involve sitting on them. I recommend it highly, because then you control the speed of penetration, and you take it as you are able, rather than praying that they know to take it slowly at first. While there are those rare moments where an ass can swallow a dick like nothing, more often than not, one is not relaxed enough to just slide right in and go to pounding.
While I’ve never bled from anal sex, I think that the chance of any damage, and a massive increase in pleasure can happen from taking control of the ride. Like others have said, don’t skimp on the lubricant. And, if you are doing it with a permanent long time partner and have long eschewed condoms, use an oil based lube. Apply it to the outside of your asshole, and gently work some inside. If your partner is gentle, and you trust them, let them lube you up, and then liberally coat them with lube. IMHO, it makes the process great. YMMV.
I realized after posting that that it would make my table manners absolutely atrocious, though, as I’d probably be trying to swallow whole bananas and cucumbers and such on a regular basis…
