As some of you may or may not know, Anthracite was referring to the physical threats and slurs made to me by Techchick
The things that were said to me by this well known, respected poster both shocked and hurt me. Especially since I know how hard this whole past month must have been on her.
Though, truth be told, I have done some things I am not proud of. I did take part of the haiku incident, but I also apologized for that. And I sincerely meant that apology, because I would like everybody to get along again. It is obvious that Anthracite and TC respect and like each other. For Anthracite’s sake, as well as my own, I would like to extend the olive branch. Especially since Anth and TC are both such sweet, intelligent posters.
I have been known to participate in some assholic behaivor, but who hasn’t? Techchick and Anth make a very strong case for apology. The healing process has to start now, folks. And if it is going to work, we all have to be a part of the solution, not a part of the problem.
TC is tight - things have got way out of hand here. How can we profess to call ourselves searchers of the “Straight Dope” if we RP’s are engaging in personal threats and crude personal attacks on each other? Well, while I must retain my right to roast trolls without apology, that privilage should not extend to respected RPs. We should all be friends, comrades, in this battle against ignorance. I say to you, TC, let the healing start NOW.
Well, it’s obvious you don’t know IRC at well, or very much, Ultress.
From the help file that comes with MIRC:
This does NOT mean people can’t see you on the channel. They can. The only way to spy is to have access to a bot and monitor the channel that way.
Here’s what I think about those who spy in the channel and then go telling others what is said about that person in chat:
I think that’s low.
I may not say everything I think about someone to their face, but that’s because it hasn’t been asked of me by them to do so (don’t worry, very few people aggrivate me enough for me to talk about them. It’s quite hard to annoy me to the point i’d do that). If you want to know what I think of you (as in, you’ve heard me saying stuff about you) then just ask me. I’ll tell you. I know chat is hardly private, but if you’re going to tell others what has been said about them by other posters, it would be nice if you’d step up to the plate and tell people in chat that you are doing so, instead of hiding behind your computer.
I realize i’ll probably burn for saying the above, but, can’t i speak my mind? Or should I pretend like ignoring things will make problems go away?
BTW, it’s a channel, not a “chatroom”. Chatrooms are for AOL, not IRC.
Without intending to bust anyone’s chops here, it’s flat impossible to separate “assholiness” from day-to-day life. Understand the emotion and the sentiment, but have to plead the 5th as a fallible human. With the criteria set forth here, who isn’t an asshole?
Never got distracted and stupid in traffic and inadvertantly cut someone off? Never said/did something totally unworthy, unmeant and thoughtless, but it still came out the mouth? Never had mundane pressures stampede you into a position you don’t hold, don’t believe but were so pissed off it seemed unavoidable to defend?
As a card-carrying dweeb, I’ve done all that and more–and worse. Not by intention but by momentum of my own making. Stupid, hurtful, totally muddled wrongheaded idiocies that are still cringe-making. (Not that I’ve stopped commiting new enormities.)
But c’mon folks, the sole advantage of acting like an asshole on occassion is the humility and clear sight to cut others some reasonable slack. If my house were truly made of glass, I’d be living in the definitive silicon valley. (The heat of shame having reforged the shards into a relective and razor-edged pit. Minds are like that.)
Most people do the best they can. Circumstances can suck, emotions can erupt but you’re gonna have that with mutable humans. People are assholes, all of us, sometimes, but that isn’t the whole definition. So are unnoticed decisions of quiet heroism and humanity.
A fervent advocate for slack,
Veb
As someone who techchick once PERSONALLY certified a “Grade-A asshole,” I felt honor-bound to reply to this thread. When someone slams my fellow assholes it gets under my skin.
Okay, that was kind of lame, but it made me smile. A little. 
I guess I don’t have the cajones for the Pit. I have no desire to keep typi
Okay, < sigh > my thread has morphed. Oh well.
GaWd,
GaWd, you think ill of me. Your liking, disliking or whatever you feel about me has no bearing on who I am. I was pissed, I created a thread. I got slammed in many ways and left. I came back and as another poster said, “she loves this place, I will get her to come back.” or something to that nature.
You bring up chat. Yes, until that night I was enjoying the hell out of chat and the boards. I felt persecuted for my friendship. I don’t remember exactly what you said in PM but it was very clear of your distaste and I did come away with the feeling that you thought of me as a loser for my friendship. I do wish I had logged it but I am not in the habit of doing so.
I am not trying to be a victim. You may take it as such, fine. That’s one problem with written communication, you can’t detect an intent. Believe what you will. Do I want to tear you an new asshole? No, it does nothing for anyone.
Now, since you keep harping on my “negative posts” you seem to enjoy focusing on those. Okay fine, whatever.
Basically GaWd, I am done with this with you. You have said your peace – good for you. It’s in the past. You have your thoughts and feelings about me as I do you. I think it would be best for the boards if you ignore me and I will agree to do the same. If you say something particularly brilliant and worthy of responding I will with regards to your post, not you as person.
Deal?
pepperlandgirl,
I am sorry I had Silo post that. I was really pissed at certain people and you struck a particular cord with your words.
Yep, my world (it’s quite obvious) is pretty weird right now. I realize that my posting, by proxy, was mean and inconsiderate.
I don’t feel anything harsh towards you. I guess had I been thinking more clearly at that point I wouldn’t have posted that.
Anyhow, I apologize for biting you. That was unfair on my part.
I indulge in assholic behavior rather more often than I prefer to think. And I mostly visit the Pit to see if anybody is complaining about me. I’m fairly accessible for email flamage, but some folks like to do that stuff in public. That’s fine, but requires me to be more proactive about finding it, which offends my basically lazy nature.
I see this thread about assholes. A likely place, so I drop in. Fortunately, I haven’t been a topic, near as I can tell. Unfortunately, I see a lot of my friends arguing, another groveling in apology over things she didn’t even do, and long-dead horses getting flogged some more.
When I was a kid we had a way of working out interpersonal problems. It burned off both physical and psychic energy while giving both parties reminders that even being right could be painful. On the net we do not have the physical access for a fistfight, though. And, as adults, it’s disorderly conduct, at best, so it’s not the option it was in second grade.
[on my high horse]
If I may be pompous enough to offer comments, here’re some:
Anthra, quit apologizing. Christ on a bicycle, few people expect you to be perfect. And contact that HR department if there is no other way, but ask yourself first if the behavior is bad enough to wreck a person’s career. Then wait a while and ask yourself again. Jerkiness is not sufficient grounds for getting them in that big of trouble. But is big enough to get them thrown off their ISP.
Pepper, thank you for extending the olive branch, although it wasn’t accepted. The way you people get so mad at each other over the silliest shit rankles me. I like my friends to get along.
Veb, again you are a voice of reason. Thank you.
Finally, Techchick68 (note parental usage of full name in order to warn of impending lecture), you really need to cool off some. Yes, the things you mentioned in the OP are annoying, but not really worth the trouble to type them in. And you should have learned by now that you risk reopening unresolved conflicts when you post catagorical flames. Since everybody does those things at one time or another you offend everybody a little, and those who already have issues with you will feel you are singling them out. Calling out “assholes” to get them to apologize is just plain foolish. You have to expect trouble when you do that.
What’s worst is that you are back to your old habit of taking everything said by anyone personally and as an attack. These are people who still like you and are trying to get along with you, but your lengthy rants become bullying. I wish you would stop that. No useful purpose is served by your becoming the SDMB bully.
All, can’t we make a little more effort to get along? This could be a nicer place if we would all follow the rule, “If it would get you punched in the nose IRL, don’t say it here.”
[off my high horse]
Lizard Person,
You can be King Of the Assholes 
I am kidding of course.
And, of course, my slow typing has allowed the situation to change some more in my absence.
Thank you for taking that step, **TC/b].
Thank you Techchick, I appreciate it very much. I’m glad to be able to put all of this behind us.
