AMA: Former Walt Disney World Character Performer
Help me write a condolence note
Dear AMA, I am sorry that you are no longer with the Walt Disney corporation…
**How can I screw my sister over(equal to what she’s done to me)
Ask the woman receiving transcranial magnetic stimulation for depression
**
Hospitalized with no insurance…a true story
So, I was just in a motorcycle accident.
Can we fill this mix tape? Funky soul food!
Easily frozen and reheatable meals.
Yeah, let’s get this…wait, what?
**For what occasions/events would you get all dressed up?
spontaneous human combustion
**
Don’t you think that Joe was dressed smokin’ hot last night?
**What’s the next major innovation in cell phone technology?
screaming kids - really?
**
Yes
Because the app comes with a MUTE button.
When the do not call list doesn’t work
Know The British
They’ll get those telemarketing bastards off your back.
** Funny Kitty Videos
Liquid nitrogen. Ouch!
Cat pictures!!!
Frank and Louie the Janus cat
**
It’s FUN to watch kittens play with liquid nitrogen!
…and I got nothin’ bad to say about Frank and Louis. It’s good to have picturexof them/him.
**Now that Ricky is out, what celebrities “everybody knows” are gay remain?
Andy Rooney Says Goodbye To 60 Minutes This Sunday **
ANDY ROONEY? DAMN!
“You know what I never understood, and that’s Lemon Parties. Why do they call it a lemon party, anyway? I don’t see any lemons there!”
**How do you usually carry your cell phone?
What’s your favorite spider?
**
Not that funny, but I first misread this as “How do you usually carry your favorite spider”? :eek:
**Today’s Iron Stomach Lunch Challenge:
Unbearable Cute Crib full of Panda Cubs **
What’s black and white and delicious all over?
A zebra? 
"Twelve Children Held Hostage by Armed Congressmen"
screaming kids - really?
Incest and animals
Has this theological concept had adherents/ been given a name?
Yes, Southern Baptists. Ow!!
Incest and animals
Why not a players league?
Pappa Dawg’s a playah!
**Husbands, how do you cope…
Women, how do you cope…
Weird situation: would you have stayed? **
I’m leaving!
No, I’m leaving!
Why don’t we both leave? Huh?
Screw that! I’m staying!
No, I’m staying!
…
**How do I get a kitten to bond with my wife?
Your dog bit my bf, it’s all cool I guess
**
When you die…
Bizarre things that are perfectly legal
It’s amazing what you can get away with when you’re dead!
I hear there are lots of things to do in Denver.