Books by their covers and missed chances-Flyp's weekend

Had to go to a wedding Saturday afternoon. Very beautiful, very proper, very LONG, very EXCRUCIATING Catholic wedding. On the way in, I noticed a very attractive young woman handing out the programs. No, not attractive; she was gorgeous. Figuring the guest book was not the best place to try out a pick up line, I made a mental note to find out more about her at the reception. So I sauntered in and put myself through Richard Simmons’ “Sweatin’ to the Wedding March” (Just an aside; if you’re a Protestant or a Jew or some other denomination, make sure you have a Catholic guideperson with you. They’re invaluable in helping you not look like an idiot when everyone starts standing and kneeling and sitting and standing and chanting and kneeling and putting their left foot in and putting their left foot out…), and six and a half hours later, went to the reception. I knew the bride and a few of her sisters and friends, so getting the background information was not hard at all. Her name is Leslie, she is 20, and they were fuzzy on whether or not she had a boyfriend (there wasn’t one with her all day, and I figured that a wedding was a required duty for a boyfriend). So, Dopers, anyone want to hazard a guess as to what her drawback was?
If you said Ecstasy freak, you guessed correctly. Apparently, this beautiful woman, who was very poiesed and looked not at all the type to indulge in such things, semi-regularly doses herself with mind altering chemicals. After I gathered this, I decided I wasn’t really up to introdcucing myself. I’m not sure if this was snobbery on my part or what, and there’s no guarantee that I won’t try to arrange a way to talk to her later, but I’m wondering if I perhaps made a mistake. I know plenty of people who smoke pot, and other than the fact I think they’re wasting money, I don’t think any less of them. Same for smokers. But there was something of a snap decision when I heard that that put me off. I’m thinking maybe I should consider this some more.

Flash forward to Saturday night, about 1:45 at the local meat market (the dance floor of The Spot, for you Spifflers). Yet another attractive woman, with a friend, stands about 15 feet away. I make eye contact one or two times, very prolonged eye contact, and am basically too chicken shit to do anything about it. Some meathead comes up to her and starts dancing with her (and man, she danced in a very pants-tightening way), and she still looks directly at me two or three more times. In other words, Dopers, I suck. Crunch time came along, and I couldn’t come through with the clutch shot.

So I’m vowing this. I’m going to force myself to converse with some strange woman this upcoming weekend with the focussed intent of getting a phone number or a date from her. If I post something resembling a blubbering pile of self-loathing next Monday, you’ll all know why.
Uh, so that was my weekend.

Give yourself some credit Flyp. you can do much better than a strange woman. Go for a normal one. You can do it.

A gorgeous woman who will most likely be souped up on X, and you pass it up.


What, exactly, are you after? Intelligent conversation?

Wait, what she on X at the wedding? Or was the rumor just that she dropped?

Don’t worry, you probably made the best choice. People generally don’t stick to just one rave drug. The only thing worse than being sober around someone who is on X is being sober around someone without knowing what the hell they’re on. Good luck next weekend, remember to look for that glimmer of despiration.

First, slight hijack. I went with my ex-gf(not ex at the time) to her church. She was Catholic and I know what it’s like making kind of a fool out of yourself. I’m protestant, so I kept doing stupid things like putting my feet up on the kneeling things. I didn’t know they were kneeling things at the time. When they finished their version of the Lord’s Prayer, I kept going. Got lots of looks on that one. You’re not alone anyway. Hijack over.

As to seeing women and not being able to make conversation with them out of nowhere, I have the same problem. I don’t know why. I’m usually not a shy person, but if I’m in like a grocery store, video store, car wash, brothel, or what have you, I have trouble just going up to a woman and making conversation. I keep telling myself that the worst that can happen is she’ll say no. That doesn’t seem to help, though.

Let this be a message to all women out there. Just because we don’t come up to you after making eye contact does not mean we’re gay or taken. It just means we’re too chickenshit to walk up to you and initiate conversation. Take it as a compliment. And next time you see a guy you don’t know, it’s probably me. So walk up to me and say hi.

I missed your post Swimming. Please tell me the secret to picking out which women are desparate. I’m just asking because I buddy of mine is curious.

No woman is ever desperate enough to settle for me.

No, I don’t think she was actually on X at the wedding. See, the thing is, Springfield is not a hotbed of rave activity. (Shit, Springfield isn’t a hotbed of any activity. Except maybe, I dunno, animal husbandry. I hate this place.) Plus, she’s not legal to get into any bars, so I can only imagine that she’s sitting around at some damn house party or something getting juiced on X.

Dammit, Swim, I was half way to deciding it would be a good idea to talk to her, and now I’m halfway to deciding it isn’t. From here on out, I fully blame you for my being single.

Oh, and thanks for rubbing it in, Res Dog.

Sorry, man. My best friend is into rave drugs (they’re not just for raves anymore!) and I get the joy of hearing how much she cleaned on her last riddie high, or how bitchin’ the last batch of K she got was. It gets tiresome after awhile. But, hey, if I can further someone else’s rationalization, I’m there for you, man.

Enabler! Enabler!
Thanks, Swim. It’s nice to know I can count on you when all other attempts to blame someone else for my own shortcomings don’t pan out. You’re a peach.

Well, if I do decide to take this any further, and you’ve apparently got a friend in somewhat the same situation, what exactly are they like when they’re juiced? I mean, what kinds of psychotic shit would I be in for? Manic bouts of activity, neuroses, mood swings, waking up in a puddle of her own sick, what? So far, the only thing I’ve heard about X is that people really like to get naked and intertwined when they’re on it, and, I gotta be honest here, that’s not really doing much to turn me off.


No guts, no glory!

Sometimes you just gotta say what the f—, and if you can’t say it you can’t do it.

Can’t win if you don’t buy a ticket.

Anyway, I can talk big now because my bachelorhood ends in 19 days but I was as chicken shit as anyone.

Be strong and remember the 1st one. It tends to help fortify the mind. Of course then you need to convince the body to walk over there…

What’s the worst that could happen she shoots you down. Then it wasn’t meant to be.

Good Luck


Glad I could help.

First of all, you don’t know how often she does it. Perhaps only at parties or concerts or something. X effects people differently, depending on the individual and whoever manufactured it. It’s like trying to describe someone when they’re drunk – it’ll effect different people differently. Usually, though, it makes people euphoric. Colors are brighter, everything is better. I don’t know about the after-effects of it, I try to stay away from shit made in people’s basements and so I can’t speak from experiance. From secondhand experiance, I’ve heard it’s like a really bad hangover. Raver Dopers? Care to step in?

Personally, I’d get to know her better before writing her off. You just don’t know what the frequency of her use is. She could have been really whacked out one night when your informant saw her, and hasn’t done it since. Or, as in my friend’s case, she could be self-medicating emotional/mental illness with illegal drugs. It’s a crap shoot.

I guess since this has kind of turned into a drug discussion, I throw in this little anecdote. A friend of mine use to do a whole bunch of acid, meth, etc. His gf only used x because she thought it had no side effects. One time, she ended up buying a some from some guy and it ended up being laced with heroine. She totally wigged out on the guy and stabbed him 3 times with a big knife before passing out. He recovered, but he still has trouble moving his left arm into some positions. She went into a coma for like 3 days and sobered up when it was all over with. The point of all this is, I’m not telling you what to do, but I would check her out a little more. I don’t do drugs(not saying I never have. I used to smoke a lot of pot), and I refuse to date anybody who uses them, even if it’s just an every once in a while thing. That’s just me, though.

You and me both, buddy :slight_smile: . I’m in Springfield too, and damn, we sit around every weekend trying to think of something to do.

But I second Sledman - you gotta try. Worst that happens is you get blown off. Best case - well, you can figure that one out, I’m sure :slight_smile:


Okay, update. The wedding girl has a boyfriend. Yet another piece of evidence that there are apparently no single women in Springfield. Absosmurfly none. But the quest continues, so I’ll be sure to let everyone know how it goes this weekend.

Oh, and thanks for the advice on raver behavior, Swim. You’re a queen among rabble.

And tygre, welcome to the quickly burgeoning ranks of the Springfield Dopers. With you, that makes four, count 'em, FOUR of us here. Make sure you drop in on the next Springfield meeting. Oh, and I’m sorry about what a sad excuse for nightlife this town offers.

Wait, there’s going to be another Springfield meeting? Better go tune my car up… :wink:

Heck yeah, I’ll come to the next one. Where do we sign up? :slight_smile:



Flyp, perhaps it is just my burning anger inside from having known a gal who was very fond of ecstasy, but I am currently of the opinion that most people who take ecstasy regularly are weak-minded sluts. She sure was. She specifically told me that she took it because it made touching feel better. (can you say: “I’ve never had a good lover, so I choose to use a drug to simulate it.”?)

I might be wrong about everyone else, but this gal, hoooooooo! In retrospect, it probably would have been like trying to copulate with a mailbox. Bitch. Like I’m a bad guy or something. Sheesh.