Bravery and what comes of it.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I finally told one of my best friends (let’s call him “D”) in the whole wide world my feelings for him. I was honest…and I wasn’t expecting anything in return, though there’s that eternal hope constantly in my heart, no matter how impossible things seem.
Then he says those magic words: “I think you and I have a chance.”
Then he says those damning words: "But I also like “A.” (who also happens to be one of my best friends)
Well, okay, fine by me. “A” has a boyfriend. But, being who I am, I tell “A” what “D” said about her, which of course confuses her.

All right, fast-forward through a few days of “D” ignoring me and “A” monopolizing any chance at a conversation with him that I might’ve had. I barely get a chance to even see him. I watch her giggle and smile and fall all over him, and her IQ subsequently drops 20 points.

I get told by a few friends that I’d better ask “D” what is going on…so while I was over at his house today, I asked him to tell me the brutal truth. The conversation went something like this.

Me: If you don’t mind, could you please tell me if I even still have a chance with you, or if I should just get on with my life?
D: If I were you, I’d get on with my life.

Okay, again, fine by me. I asked for the brutal truth, I got it. However, I’ve learned my lesson with the both of them. We’ll all still be friends, but I’m not trusting them. And yes, my heart is broken, and yes, I’m mad at them, but you know…I don’t wish anything bad on them. I could hope that their upcoming relationship would rip both of them apart, but why bother? If they’re happy, they’re happy. If they’re not, well, by the time their relationship plays out, I’ll be gone to college.
I’m really glad I only have 2 days of school left (seniors get out early) so that I won’t have to look at either of them. I don’t think I can do it, and I don’t think they deserve it.
I don’t want revenge. I don’t want to hate them. All I want is to be indifferent to the whole situation, but that’s going to take some precious time. I guess what I really need right now is sympathy. I thought I was worth something, and I guess I still am to myself, but it really hurts to feel like what I am doesn’t matter to anyone.

I’m sorry for having this massive pity party. It’s just one of those things you can’t help.

Life goes on, and all things pass, and I hope this passes soon.

2

I know this won’t help much, but maybe it’ll help some(one).

You have the luxury, when you get to college, of choosing if you’re going to like someone or not. Unless that someone is on your floor or vital to your survival, it really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things if they’re your friend or not. So find good people and stay with them. No more of this “I have to be nice to him, he’s A’s friend and I’m friends with A even if she does have weird (bordering on insanely moronic) taste in members of the opposite sex” shit you have in high school.

Unless you go to college with people you know, which in your case might not be such a red-hot idea. Making your own name and all that jazz:)

{K}

3

Ohh, I’m only in grade 9, and I have a slightly similiar (though toned down) version of this going on in my life, and feel soo bad for you! I wish I could do more than just send good thoughts, but I can’t.

{{{{Katya}}}}

:(:(:frowning:

4

I know this probably won’t help much, but here’s a little something I learned a long time ago.

If you love someone let them go.

If they come back to you, they’re yours.

If not, stalk them.

{{{Nocturne)))

5

If you love someone,

let them go.

If they don’t come back,

call them at three in the morning when you’re drunk…

6

I’d hate them.

I’d want revenge.

I’d drop them like hot, burned potatoes.

I’d strike in the night when there is no moon and they least expect it.

But, then, I’m not you.

Flattening tires is fun!

7

Nocturne, you do matter, and not just to yourself. I know it’s small (or no) consolation right now, but if he was that insensitive to your feelings then you are better off without him.

I wish I had the words that would make things better for you, but only time will do that. Try to keep yourself busy and not dwell on it and feel free to email me if you don’t want to vent further off the boards (mauvaise3@yahoo.com).
{{{ Nocturne }}}

8

Oh!

And Good For You for taking the chance and telling “D” about your feelings. It may not have worked out the way you wanted, hon, but you should be very proud of yourself for saying anything. It was a brave thing to do and you should respect that and not let the end result keep you from doing it again in the future if the situation merits it.

9

((((((Nocturne)))))

You did the right things, honey.

Honesty is always the best way to go…even if you hear things you didn’t want to hear, at least you know exactly what you are dealing with. And it is really hard to deal with a situation when you are unsure exactly what is going on.

I’m sending you prayers and positive vibes, I know it isn’t much, but it’s all I can do atm.

Scotti

10

Thanks to all who’ve replied; I appreciate all of you.

iampunha: Advice you’ve given many times, and always well-received. :slight_smile:

Speaker: You know I’m always here for you as well.

Euty, thanks for the laugh. I really needed it! Same to you, Zenster. You two are awesome…I wish there were more males like you. (Zenster IS a male right…so I don’t feel stupid?)

CheezedOff, no, you’re not me, but I’m not going to say all those scenarios ran through my head. I just think they’d only bring more trouble for me…and I don’t need that.

Mauvaise, thanks for your input. I was beginning to feel rather stupid and selfish for taking initiative. Thank you. I wish I was coming to you this summer, but our budget (and time) won’t allow. I’ll make it there someday.

Scotti, I didn’t expect any less of you. You consistently show me the best of human qualities in every thread in which you participate. Thank you.

11

Katie,

Some day, you will meet someone who will treat you like royalty. Someone who will show you the kind of love that you show to others. The kind of person who will sweep you off your feet.

You deserve nothing less.

If I can do anything to ease your pain, you know where to find me.