Easy for you to say with your zymolosely polydactile penis.
Teeth.
And my xmex-like snout! 
I hesitate to chime in, as I could be accused of perpetuating stereotypes. However, a trip to Bangkok may be in order for the OP. It could be good therapy.
The city has a long tradition of BJ bars – indeed, the country, as one bar is a national chain. The newest offering is – I’m not making this up – Dr BJ’s, British-owned and -operated but with a Thai lady partner of my acquaintance whose normal full-time job is operating the family brothel – again, I swear I’m not making this up. (The brothel is Annie’s Massage, in operation since 1972, Annie being this lady’s mother.) The website is (very much NSFW, so link is broken): bjbarbangkok.com.
I may not indulge anymore these days, but I certainly do know many of the players. Dr. BJ himself is a very pleasant British chap who just moved here for the purpose of fulfilling a life-long desire to run his own BJ bar. (No, he does not personally provide service.) Rather young, made some money as an electrician or electrical engineer back in Blighty I believe. I know the website looks like a joke, but I can assure you it is not. The good doctor was aiming for a light-hearted, humorous approach. I have personally been inside having a drink with the owner and can vouch it is real. The ladies in the gallery have been given fake names (obviously), but some of them I know also. A few are moonlighting from Annie’s.
The next-to-newest is called Lollipop1, but no website. The owner is a Thai lady of legendary skill in Bangkok BJ circles. She saved up enough money to open her own BJ bar, and she tells me it’s doing quite well.
So I advise the OP to skedaddle over here pronto, and I’m pretty certain we can find someone who can help solve your problem.
The last two guys I was with couldn’t do it either. The first one just said “I never have been able to” so I think he just had a mental block about it. He may have done it with me once, maybe.
The second guy definitely, definitely had a “death grip” problem and some days couldn’t come if you paid him.
I think it’s all mental but I also don’t think it’s wildly uncommon.
I think your response to the first one should have been “Will you marry me?”
Teeth. Take your rings off. Don’t forget to use your hand, but make sure not to use it “dry”.
I don’t think I’ve ever NOT orgasmed via oral, and I’ve had some pretty subpar bjs in my day.
For real! I had no idea that Qadgop read Savage Love. 
OP, it’s really not a big deal. I’d say around half the guys I’ve been with have liked oral but not been able to orgasm from it (and all of them liked oral). Especially if you’re circumcised, since keratinization of the penis leads to loss of sensation. Uncircumcised penisi are a lot more sensitive than circumcised ones. It’s not a failing. There are ways to train your wiener, but I don’t think it’s necessary. Your wife taking offense is the one with the issue.
I am a man who doesn’t enjoy blowjobs. The roof of the mouth is too hard, there are teeth in the way… Fuck dat, give me a vagina or a nice HJ any day…
Joe
I couldn’t resist checking out Siam Sam’s link. Of interest is the expansion plan (franchising?), which includes new outlets (inlets?) in…wait for it… the Falkland Islands and Vatican City. Wonder if the Pope and his staff will get a special discount. Not to mention some sheep who will be relieved.
I think you fit the porn industry requirement perfect; They want no premature ejaculator for their movies.
It’s down to the technique, in my experience. It’s certainly not just the act itself, and it doesn’t happen every time for me unless it’s well performed. A few years ago I had one girl promise to take me to the height of ecstasy and make my head explode with joy and it would be over in seconds she was that damn good - but she wasn’t really, and I couldn’t come.
My ex from a few years ago though… holy fucking shit she knew her onions. She was a thundering bitch who ruined my life, but goddamn I miss that.
I’ve never climaxed from oral pleasure, but I don’t consider that particularly problematic. There are lots of things in life that men stereotypically think are awesome, but I couldn’t care less about.
Dr BJ says that’s part of the humor, although the other potential locations inside Thailand he really is considering. Especially since business has been booming since he opened just a few months ago. There’s some stiff competition, but it can be overcome with a little technique.
It takes a great deal of trust and communication with the er, face fuckee. Basically, you just have to relax your jaw, get your tongue down and out of the way, open your throat and wait for it to be over. Not my favorite activity, but it’s not quite as horrific as it looks in print.
I think a lot of good possible reasons are given in this thread. For me it does seem to be mainly a combination of the mental block and a ‘need’ to control the rythm (a woman on top can rarely make me come either, without at least some input from me). Off course a woman’s skill is of importance as well, but I can honestly say I have been with some excellent oral sex providers - with international acclaim in this regard (technically correct and it sounds awesome to put it like this:)) - that couldn’t get me over the edge. With these girls the funny thing is, that I feel like I’m about to pop all the time when I’m trying to hold back; but when I want to let go, I don’t get there (unless I join in in some activity).
couple things.
you might not be getting enough of the simulation you are used to for orgasm, other ordinary methods are very different in sensation.
once you start having trouble then you get anxious during attempts which is a damper.
get distracted and relax.
if your bodies fit try a 69 with you on your back and her on top. this is relaxing for you (other orgasms methods you might like could involve tension in your body though that is maximum tension, partial tension of top/side 69 may be distracting). with her on top she has maximum mouth freedom to do all the good stuff she can. you have easy access with extended tongue and slightly bent neck (use a small pillow if you want).
feel good with what she does and don’t think about it. work on her. being furious might be distracting but softer actions are good. do your best on her and make her respond slowly. sense her response in her genitals, her body tension, her breathing, feel her response build slowly that is quite a turn on for most guys. you know you are feeling good so don’t give it a thought, you got goodness down there. pay attention to her response, keep it going, ramp it up, make her come, if she does multiples then do that for her. sooner or later she’ll get a mouthful.
if you get good at coming while 69 then later getting it done solo to you would likely work better too.
Is it any wonder? As young boys, we all heard the frightening folk tales of the mythic os dentatum. <shiver>
I used to have this problem. I realized that after years of jerking off, I had accustomed myself to having my hand wrapped around my cock with my fingers on the bottom and thumb on top, and the pleasurable sensations came from the majority of my hand on the underside of it. But with my first girlfriend, just her mouth wasn’t enough; even when she used her hand to help things along, she was approaching it from the opposite angle, with her fingers on top and thumb on bottom, and I didn’t get the sensations I was used to. We rectified the situation by me laying on my back and having her kneel next to my head, so when she gripped it, it was in the manner I was used to. That, combined with her enthusiastic head bobbing and tongue manipulation, was what finally brought me over the brink.
Once we got past that point, we progressed to the point where I could come when she was kneeling in front of me. Now my wife has it down perfectly and can get me 90% of the way there with just her mouth, and only brings her hand into the act at the very end.
I’m probably the guy here with the most experience receiving BJs, certainly from the greatest number of people . . . all guys. In fact it’s the ***only ***way I can climax with another person. The best thing about this is that my sex life is not at all different, now that I no longer get erections.
I think the thing that most “givers” do wrong is using their lips instead of their tongues. The absolute worst BJs I’ve received were from someone making a perfect “O” with their mouth, then moving their head up and down. No thanks, I’d rather take care of it myself. But it’s the tongue that gives the greates pleasure . . . I mean the flat, top surface of the tongue. It has to “hug” the shaft, creating the greatest amount of surface-to-surface contact. No teeth, no roof of mouth . . . and no hands either. Just mostly the tongue and slightly the lips for guidance. And if your partner’s mouth is a little on the dry side, a small sip of olive oil is the best remedy (yes, we keep a bottle next to the bed).
But you have to do your part as well. I think too many guys have “control” issues about sex. They need to be the assertive force, and have trouble handing that control over to their partner. The important thing is to simply lie back, close your eyes and relax. Just accept the pleasure in the spirit it’s intended, rather than a dominance/submission thing (oh yes, we can go there too, but that’s in next week’s lecture). Most men are not accustomed to being totally relaxed during sex; you may need to work on this.
And if all of this still doesn’t work for you . . . then do whatever it is that you and your partner enjoy. This isn’t some kind of triathlon, where you have to master every kind of event.