Carnac the Magnificent game

Envelope: What did George Costanza’s date shriek in the hot tub?

Carnac: Too sexy for my shirt.

Envelope: What does Janet Jackson apparently consider herself?

Carnac: A little dab’ll do ya.

Envelope: What is Enrique Iglesias’ favourite motto?
Carnac: Meat and two veg.

Envelope: What did Jeffrey Dahmer call the stomach of a young PETA activist?

Carnac: That’s the last straw.

Envelope: What McDonald’s Crew Member said right before a small riot broke out at the beverage counter.

Carnac: We try harder.

Envelope: What is Cialis’ newest ad campaign?


Carnac: Two steps north of the Mason Dixon line.

Answer: How far North must one live to be considered a God-Damned Yankee?

Carnac: Good Year, GW Bush, and Bonzo

Envelope: What will it have been when which current office-holder is replaced by whom?

Carnac: A 1920’s-style Death Ray.

Envelope: What a 1920s-style alien would use to obliterate the Earth.

Carnac: Get more from life.

Envelope: What will you do now that they’ve increased the size of cereal boxes?

Carnac: Four legs good, two legs bad.

Envelope: What sensible guideline should your butcher follow?
Carnac: A passel of turnips.

Envelope: What should you NOT serve the child who will eventually decide whether you go into the “good” nursing home or the “bad” nursing home?

Carnac: Mountains out of molehills.

What is Britney Spears’s plastic surgeon suspected of making?

Envelope: John Paul II, Lifebuoy, and Keanu Reeves.

A pope,.a soap, and a dope.

Envelope: It smells like cabbage.

Name a pope, a soap and a dope.

Carnac: Bilbo Baggins

Just popping in to say that the question to the answer (original Carnac) Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition was originally “What should you do if you discover that you’ve swallowed a live hand grenade?”

Now back you your regular program. The choices are:

Carnac: Bilbo Baggins
or
Envelope: It smells like cabbage.

Answering “Envelope [read:Carnac]: It smells like cabbage.”:

Envelope: When you have a mole, under what condition should you visit the doctor?

Carnac: Allen, Paar, Bishop, and Griffith.

Envelope: Who were the original Pretenders?

Carnac: Once in a lifetime.

Envelope: How often should one expect to correct Cecil?
Carnac: In a pig’s ear.

Envelope: If Mike Tyson had a craving for pork, where would you find his teeth?

Carnac: It’s the thought that counts.