BarGames — a trivia contest at the local tavern spirals out of control, ending with a dramatic foodfight between rival teams.
Planet of the Aped — an astronaut returns to a future Earth to discover a society based on cruel, childish mockery.
Fahrenheit 151 — in a future dystopia, roving police squads strictly enforce the minimum regulations for cooking soup, as a draconian measure to prevent salmonella outbreaks.
**Ponder **- The somewhat tedious story of a teen albino who wonders… What if?
Blazing Paddles - Mel Brooks humorous take on the story of the first professional African-American ping pong player.
A Shit in the Dark - Peter Sellers loses power to his apartment at the worst possible time… post Fiesta Night at Golden Corral
Furious George A series of amusing children’s tales about an explorer who adopts a monkey with serious anger management issues which leads to “adventures” within the legal system.
Who Framed Roger Rabbi
This made me smile.
Based on the novel by Darles Chickens.
The Punk Panther - Inspector Clouseau goes undercover at CBGBs.
The Umpire Strikes Back - He has been hit with too many pop-flies
The Bug Lebowski - The Dude likes his roach
No Country For Odd Men - Normal guys don’t do so well here either
**Viagra ** - Desperate to keep Marilyn Monroe’s interest, Joseph Cotton invents the new drug
Piddler on the Roof A Jewish community is terrorized by a creepy stalker/killer played by Robin Williams. The stalker marks his territory of his future victims by urinating down the chimney. Once the family smells the tell tale stink they know their days are numbered.
Horton Heats a Who A Dr Suess classic with a very dark twist. A lovable elephant discovers a race of tiny beings who live in a dandy lion flower. While he is giving them a tour of his kitchen an accidental splash of hot oil results in a dark discovery. The elephant cannot resist the taste of flesh. A story of gruesome genocide follows as the main character explores various ways of cooking his little friends.
E.D. A tiny alien agent with a penis for a finger befriends some trusting suburban youth and recruits them in an evil plot to steal the worlds viagra supply.
Horse on Haunted Hill: There’s only one way to escape a haunted mansion, but none of the guests can ride.
Silent Bill: Only one man knows what’s wrong with Rose’s adopted daughter, but Bill isn’t talking.
Mouse: A timid but brilliant diagnostician allows his team of specialists to insult him and ignore his orders in a NJ teaching hospital.
Horse M.D. When Mr. Ed suffers a leg injury, the vet recommends euthanasia (of course, of course). Though he refuses to accept euthanasia, and goes on to become a brilliant diagnostic veterinarian, his leg injury proves debilitating, leaving him in constant pain and with an addiction to animal tranquilizers and a bitter, sardonic personality.
NCHS: A motley crew of government workers who, strangely enough, end up having to not only collect and disseminate data but fight diseases, cure the sick individuals they’re surveying, and uncover massive conspiracies involving health insurance companies.
My Wittle Pony = a cartoon where the fanbase actually is entirely made up of little girls.
Erection - High schooler who just can’t keep it down runs for student body president. Penis ensues.
I know. Too easy.
Orange County Chompers A reality show about a family run business that makes showy expensive custom dentures for people and businesses with more money than sense. Watch as family patriarch/testoterone fueled asshole Senior Senior gives regular ass chewings to his son Senior Junior, his grandson Junior Senior, and his great grandson Junior Junior.
BCIS A crack team of detectives, computer nerds, scientist, and kick asses investigate the deaths of members of the butler union.
Bill Bill An action packed movie about a sexy female assisine who goes to work for a credit collection agency due to having a child and the downturn in the economy. Ironically, its this same downturn that causes her old mentor Bill to default on his credit card debt. A battle for the ages ensues as she tries to collect the debt.
Hawaii Fave O Four gay men from New York sweep through Hawaii throwing away tiki torches, burning Hawaiin shirts, and ripping off thatched roofs, showing the locals how to eat, dress, decorate, and groom themselves like proper metrosexuals.
Tot Chef A high pressure competive cooking series where the competitors are kindergardeners with pushy, ego driven, selfish parents with low self esteem. Warning, many graphic accidents involving hot oil, blenders, mixers, and pizza ovens are shown.
Mathbusters - Week after week, Adam and Jamie show the interminable theoretical basis for cool experiments that no one would actually do, because that’d just be crazy. The tedious show is cancelled halfway throught he first season.
Duxter - This light-hearted DIsney sequel to Ducktales follows the adventures of Duxter Morgan, a second cousin (twice removed) from the famous Scrooge McDuck, as he tries to eliminate the competition by fair means- or fowl!
How It’s Male - :eek:
Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sea, But Were Too Afraid To Ask - the definitive documentary on being a mariner.
Withnail & E - Danny gets hold of something way ahead of its time.
The Killing Fiends - Cambodian zombie romp.
Four Weedings and a Funeral - An elderly gardener overdoes it, with tragic consequences.
1001: A Space Odyssey - My God, it’s full of peasants.
Primevil: tears in the fabric of time set a motley group of scientists after historical serial killers who come through and terrorize modern-day London.
Resident Eval: There are only two things that are keeping Alice from being a doctor - passing her final med school exams, and the horde of zombies that her evaluators have become.
The Silence of the Lamps – The Clapper’s not working.
Bed Dust – Clark Gable and Jean Harlow are having intimacy problems, and she’s not much of a housekeeper, either.
Torrid Pone – James Cagney and Ann Sheridan get lusty over a pan of cornbread.
The Glass Keg – Alan Ladd gets beat up a lot, but he knows how much beer is left.
The Princess Brine - Sword and sorcery adventure set in the Caspian Sea.
Get Him to the Green - Snoop Dogg’s dealer goes out of town for the weekend. What will he do? Call up Wilmer Valderama and go on an adventure to find pot, that’s what!
Weakened at Bernie’s* - Are you sure those oysters were alright? And where the hell is Bernie, anyway?
*cheated a little here, couldn’t help myself!
Afro Can Queen Catherine Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart squabble as they try desperately to run a sucessful hair salon in Watts, particularly after their Fro in a Can spray on hair product nearly bankrupts them.
In Golden Pond A touching (and borderline porn) movie about two aging lovers and their very strong mutual like for large bathtubs and human liquid waste products.
It Cume from Outer Space A very low budget Mexican produced porn movie that spoofs the sci fi genre. With poorly translated English subtitles (obviously, as they couldn’t even spell the American title properly). Unless you can see it or get it for free don’t bother.
Hughlander A behind the scenes documentary of the cut throat nature of the acting world. We see Hugh Laurie get backstabbed and play dirty himself as he gets and fights to maintain his role as Dr. Gregory House. At one point he proudly proclaims “There can be only one!”
Cocky A cute children’s claymation movie about a Mexican underdog rooster who devotes his whole life training for cock fighting in the ring, hoping to break into the big time and move to America.