Come one, come all, to join my Posse!!!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Yes, it is true! Posses do exist, and yes, they have evil intent for us all!

You’ve all heard of such scary and mysterious Clans such as:

“The Opals” - once mighty, they made the Board quake in fear. Now they wait in exile, planning, taking their little notes, watching us and waiting, oh yes, waiting…

“Oldscratch’s Gang of Five” - a new street-gang type of Posse that is rumbling loud and fast. Time will tell if this ragtag gang of new upstarts has what it takes to continue to kick ass and take down names.

The quiet but still present “NC/VA Eastern Octopus”, a low-key Posse that wields deadly power in the back rooms and smoky salons of the SDMB.

The flamboyant “Bay Area Badasses”, a group that appears at first to be harmless and fun, but in truth has an underlying evil and diabolical plan for us all…

And, of course, the “Secret and Dread Cabal of Moderators” - the most terrible ones of all, limited in power only by their small membership. However, it is alleged their power base grows through sockpuppets. Unclebeer himself once confided to me on a ferry in Istanbul, when his guard was down, that he had more than 500 sockpuppets alone! And this mighty army was poised and ready, waiting to bring on “The Year of the Skulls” on the SDMB, whatever that means…

There are those who claim that the “Unholy Lesbian Vampire Army of the Night (ULVAN)” is a Posse, but that is lies, all lies. They are a harmless social club of fine ladies who discuss World Trade issues over tea in Una’s garden. The do not terrorize the Board and chat nightly, spreading the will of the Dark Queen until finally, victory will be ours!!!

Not at all.

But, since ULVAN is somewhat limited in scope, I call for the formation of a new Posse - led by me! Just think of the benefits you can get!

  1. Feel elite at being in a secret society!

  2. Join the gang mentality! Never fear flaming or being flamed alone again!

  3. Know the bliss of worshiping without question an unstable and mostly insane leader (me!)!

  4. Most of all, you get a special tattoo, designed by Sub-Adjunct Hamadryad! (or a special piercing, for the ladies :wink: )

As leader of this Posse, henceforth called “The Unas”, you may address me as Maximum Procounsel Una. ULVAN members may still address me as the Dark Queen, if they so choose.

Come join me, my sisters and brothers, as we of this new Posse walk hand-in-hand on the shining path to paradise!

[sub]Post is intended for humorous purposes only. No offence is intended. Woo![/sub]

2

you’d fit right in.

And of course, I want to join as the token spider.

----:p/
----///\\

3

Hmm never joined a SDMB gang before but---- IM IN
(always up for a little mob mentality)

4

Do I really have to call you Maximum Procounsel Una? Una is just so much easier to type…

5

Sigh. OK, just call me “Una” with a silent “Maximum Procounsel” on the front of it. :wink:

6

So, Silver, are you ready for your piercing then?

7

I’m in, but only if I’m 2nd in Command. :slight_smile:

8

Can I join? I’ll even get the Cecilian mafia to help you. Remember them? You were a member. I’ll find that thread sometime.

I want to be our combat master.

We still need someone to co-ordinate dance moves, and get the “Crazy! Cool!” thing down.

9

OK. Pepper’s my Lieutenant. We need some Board Spies (both Boards), Chat Moles, 3F Rabble Rousers, Enforcers, some Wild Boys, Predatory Lesbians and Lesbian Sex Therapists, Weapons Specialists, Uberhackers, Legal Eagles, Ravers, Backup Vocalists, Animal Trainers, Una’s Solid Gold Dancers, some Flame-Baiters, some Sockpuppets, and some choice trolls.

We also need to subvert a Moderator or two (my vote is Chronos - he’s already working on a master plan to depose Coldfire…). And get Double Agents in all of the other Posses.

Then we will have a good start.

10

I will fall under weapons specialist then.

And lesbian hanky-panky watcher. Hey! Stop hitting me!

11

Oh, also I will be a Raver. Nothing like glowsticks!

12

We also need some good Chefs as well, in addition to Sports Commentators.

And I would like an Official Masseuse too. A nice woman with strong hands…

And then we need a plan. A good plan. Hmmmm…to do that, we need to elect an Inner Circle - they can be called the “Council of St. Bartholin”. Because the weight of leadership may grow heavy on Una’s head, and she must delegate responsibility…

13

Howsebout Maxpro Una? Short, sweet, got a ring to it.

Also, what about dental benefits? And life insurance. I sure as heck m’not going to join a gang that doesn’t have dental and life. Well, maybe…

14

::whistles, scuffs toe in dust, looks innocent::

Just between you and me, Coldy is in solid; he’s got the Dutch dope and hooker cartels behind him. They can provide significant savings in the staff development budget line.

No, you need someone…obscure. Someone nerdy, even. Someone so bland they can blend in invisibly, though maybe not the golden dancing girls.

Veb

15

Yep, I sure am! :slight_smile:

16

Oh, oh, oh…can I PLEASE be the prima donna of the Solid Gold Dancing Girls? I can dance, I promise!

17

I wanna join. I can be a Chat Mole. [badgermanaccent]Ve haff vays of mekink you tawk[/badgermanaccent]
Robin

18

Damn! I have a posse conflict! While part of oldscratch’s Gang of Five, I will soon be joining the **Bay Area Badasses[/b!]!

Do I have to turn in my card for one to join the other?

19

sigh maybe I’ll start my own possee of Those Who Cannot Sucessfully Close their VB Tags.

20

Hey! What’s going on in here?

[sub]I’m in the NC/VA posse, I think . . . I can help you out there. I also hang out a bit in chat.[/sub]