Leave the poor girl alone.
Maybe she just thinks you’re funny looking and that’s why she giggles when she’s near you? Or maybe she just thinks you’re an utter tool…or arrogant…or stupid.
I’m going to jump on the “throw her a bone and DON’T ask her out” bandwagon. I’m a huge nerd and I’m damned fun, thank you very much.
You know, us “nerd” girls laugh at guys like you, too…it’s not just a one-way street 
An available nerd-girl? Where?
… Texas? Darn.
I wouldn’t consider dating any other kind. (Not that I date a lot. Or at all. Well, once or twice. )
I mean, if a girl doesn’t like at least one of : Anime, MST3K, BTVS, Comics, RPGS, Video Games, Movies, Computers … what are we gonna have to talk about?
Whoa! Jeez, what’s with all the vitrol?
Listen, it’s not like I’m going to ask the girl out and tell her a bunch of lies and try to get down her pants all the while telling her “Oh, yeah baby you’re the only one for me.”
All I’m saying is that I’m offering to take the girl out, where ever she wants to go and its all on me.
Whats so f’n mean spirited about that?
Because from what I gather, she doesn’t have any friends and she NEVER get asked out.
OK, I could have been that “nerd girl”, as you so elequently put it. In fact, at school, I was that girl, and quite frankly, and YMMV and all that, I would rather never ever have a date, or go out, if the person was simply doing it out of pity. She will find out that you were simply taking pity on her, and her self-image will spiral ever downwards.
Why don’t you try being her friend, getting to know her? She might not be as geeky/nerdy as you think she is.
Oh, I see…you’re doing this because you’re such a swell guy. Just being near you will make this pathetic loser’s whole life worthwhile.
Maybe that’s not what you mean, but that’s the vibe I get from the way you have expressed yourself.
Do it because you’re attracted to her, not because she’s lonely. 'Nuff said.
I’d have to agree with Angua - pity dates are worse than no dates. She’ll find out eventually.
Because you’re offering to take her out on a pity date.
Please do a good deed in this – arrange for this Nerd Girl to meet some Geek Guy you know.
There’s a lot of interesting Nerd Girls in this thread… but IMHO ain’t the place to flirt… maybe it’s time to start another Doper Dating Site thread?
Couldn’t say it better.
SHAKES, cut out the “throw her a bone”-stuff (it is not cool, just irritatingly condescending) and be honest. Do ***you ** * like her? What would **you ** (not her) gain from asking her out?
What is it about her that makes her ‘nerdy’? Is she a bookworm, or introverted, or philosophical or what? Is she ugly? I don’t see anything wrong/unappealing about this person just from being nerdy and i dont think most people would either, but if as you said nobody asks her out then there has to be something.
vitrol? because you’re offering her a pity date, assuming she even wants to go out with you. It’s mean spirited because you’re assuming nobody else will ask her out. How do you really know that she “NEVER” gets asked out? Did she tell you this? Again, if you’re only doing it out of pity, she can only get hurt if she actually does like you.
If you don’t WANT to go out with her, then don’t ask her out, it’s that simple, nerd or not.
Nothing I can say here that hasn’t already been echoed 30 times over.
Except for, isn’t the SDMB an odd place to hang out if you look down on nerdy types?
Why must there be something wrong with her? What about the people around her?
When I was younger, I never used to get asked out. By anyone. Why? Well, most likely, the people around me didn’t appreciate me for who I was - there was too much emphasis on looking and acting “cool” and trendy, and I just wanted to be quirky ol’ me.
Then, I moved away (went to University actually), and suddenly realised that there were a lot of people who liked me for me, and not for some magazine/media perpetrated ideal (at high school, the running “joke” was that my only redeeming feature was ‘fit ankles’. No mention of my intelligence, or personality, or anything like that - all it was was looks.).
The point I’m trying to make here, is that just because she’s never had a date, doesn’t mean there’s something inherently wrong with her. Maybe the people around her are those who really can’t see past the physical.
He gets to feel all philanthropic and shit. 'Cause dating’s always a priority for any woman, especially the nerdy ones who never date, and obviously nobody actually asks nerd girls out or anything. :rolleyes: The married femnerds on the board? Eh, we must have had pity dates that got way out of control. (There’s just not a smiley with rolly enough eyes, really.)
Why the vitriol? Because it’s rude, arrogant, and condescending to assume that this woman would be grateful for a date, any date at all, even with some jackass who thinks she’s bound to be no fun at all and just feels sorry for her. We don’t like rude, arrogant, and condescending people around here, in case you hadn’t noticed.
Stick with your barflies. No, really, you’ll do the woman much more good if you don’t send her the message that she’s so pathetic and repulsive no man would ever want to date her on her own merits. (I still have to wonder why you think she’d want to go out with the likes of you. It’s entirely possible she turns red and laughs because you’re so amusingly, but distressingly, misguided.)
That was a response to Maastricht, btw.
It was always my understanding that (sadly) men are spineless syncophants hitting on anything that walks. I assumed if a woman didn’t get caught up in that then most men didn’t find her appealing.
I don’t know if i can speak for all men, but i don’t think nerdiness, if nerdiness means the ability to be intelligent, is a turn off. If nerdiness is always having asthma and zits then i guess some guys would not like that though. So i don’t see why men wouldn’t like her, so i’m wondering what it is about her that is so bad. If anything.
In my experience, which has changed rather dramatically to be honest, is that a lot of men who are rather shallow will hit on anything with a vagina as long as she’s slim to boot, intelligence is not an issue.
As I’ve gotten older, and moved in somewhat more intelligent circles, I’ve found that my intelligence and curviness (I am not supermodel slim at all, and have real curves), act in my favour and a lot of guys do end up trying to hit on me.
If “nerd girl” has unfortunately for her, been moving in shallow guy circles for all her life, she will probably have had the experience I described in my first paragraph, and most guys will describe her, as Shakes has, as a nerd. I know I did for a good few years, and was constantly referred to as the “nerd”, “geek”, “freak”, “weirdo”, because well, I was different.
Just remember, Sarah Jessica Parker from Square Pegs grew up to be Sarah Jessica Parker from Sex and the City.
Leave her alone—I think she’ll be too much for you.