Just thinking about them makes me laugh. The whole concept of “cow”. MOO! That’s a surefire funny response to anything anyone has to say. Sometimes I like to interrupt people right in the middle of a perfectly somber sentence with it. Moo! I love it!
Alos funny, in my opinion, are the words “monkey” and, to a lesser extent, “chicken”. A few nights ago, while I was in that semi-conscious state right before fully dozing off, I exclaimed, appropos of nothing, “I heard monkeys are mean.” My girlfriend cracked up for a good half hour. Sure, that’s partly because it was a non sequitur, but it wouldn’t have been nearly as funny if I’d said “I heard snakes are mean.” See what I’m getting at?
One last thing that I find hilarious is the word “poo.” You just don’t hear it enough. Maybe I just like it 'cause it rhymes with “moo”, but I think it’s pretty good in its own right. That is all.
woodstock i grew up on a Beef farm. I have been surrounded by them my whole life, 20 years of wall to wall cows. At night, when it’s quiet, sometimes i can hear them. If i were to walk out in my back yard right now i know i’d see some cows.
My point? I STILL think they’re funny. They’re so big and goofie and dumb. I mean really man, cows got lots and lots of stupid. they look at you with these big, vacent eyes, perpetually chewing, and say “moo”. that sums it all up, right there, “moo”
i’m gonna go look at them right now.
** Moose**
Bwahahahahaaaaaa hahaaaaahahahaaaaa!
I dunno. Just cracks me up.
Yeah, they are. My friends nickname is moo. Moo is funny. When I was in sevent grade on the bus to space camp all my friends made up a song. Sung to the tune of the George of the Jungle song.
Cows Cows Cows Cows Cows Cows
Cows are really neat - yeah yeah
They are a special treat - yeah yeah
Especially with a danish
And with Mr Ranish (one of our teachers)
Cows Cows Cows Cows Cows Cows
Also, right now I’m listening to the song on the rent coundtrack which is the protest, where one of the characters gets all the homeless people to start mooing.
My friend Kalen loves cows. He got a bouncy cow stuffed animal for Christmas, but when he made it bounce in the box, it looked like it was humping the box. I was supposed to make him a mix cd of cow songs too, but I haven’t bothered.
Have you ever heard the song I am Cow by the Arrogant Worms? It’s extremely amusing. My bf loves it.
OK, nuff about cows.
This topic is an udder disgrace.
Fat and docile, big and dumb
They look so stupid, they aren’t much fun
Cows aren’t fun
They eat to grow, grow to die
Die to be et at the hamburger fry
Cows well done
Nobody thunk it, nobody knew
No one imagined the great cow guru
Cows are one
He hid in the forest, read books with great zeal
He loved Che Guevera, a revolutionary veal
Cow Tse Tongue
He spoke about justice, but nobody stirred
He felt like an outcast, alone in the herd
Cow doldrums
He mooed we must fight, escape or we’ll die
Cows gathered around, cause the steaks were so high
Bad cow pun
But then he was captured, stuffed into a crate
Loaded onto a truck, where he rode to his fate
Cows are bummed
He was a scrawny calf, who looked rather woozy
No one suspected he was packing an Uzi
Cows with guns
They came with a needle to stick in his thigh
He kicked for the groin, he pissed in their eye
Cow well hung
Knocked over a tractor and ran for the door
Six gallons of gas flowed out on the floor
Run cows run!
He picked up a bullhorn and jumped up on the hay
We are free roving bovines, we run free today
We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns
They crashed the gate in a great stampede
Tipped over a milk truck, torched all the feed
Cows have fun
Sixty police cars were piled in a heap
Covered in cow pies, covered up deep
Much cow dung
Black smoke rising, darkening the day
Twelve burning McDonalds, have it your way
We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns
The President said “enough is enough
These uppity cattle, its time to get tough”
Cow dung flung
The newspapers gloated, folks sighed with relief
Tomorrow at noon, they would all be ground beef
Cows on buns
The cows were surrounded, they waited and prayed
They mooed their last moos,
they chewed their last hay
Cows out gunned
The order was given to turn cows to whoppers
Enforced by the might of ten thousand coppers
But on the horizon surrounding the shoppers
Came the deafening roar of chickens in choppers
We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns
The lyrics to this song came fro Dana Lyon’s website http://www.cowswithguns.com. He had them posted there, and I hope he wouldn’t mind me reposting them here.
Here’s a word that always got me:
Ladle (say it over and over again for a while… i dunno, there’s just something so Zen about it…)
So what if I’ve got a dozen of them. I collect ladles.
Stop looking at me that way!
Have you ever watched a cow try to eat an orange? It’s hillarious and disgusting at the same time. How do people eat their tongues???
There’s this book by Jane Smiley (like that last name isn’t hilarious) has a book called “Moo.” And this is the kicker–there’s a pig on the cover!!! Now I’m sure if it’s anything like that that other book she wrote, the one that was made into a crappy movie (A Thousand Acres, I think), it’s depressing as hell. But, dude, it’s called Moo. It’s funny!
As for the mystique behind “monkey”–you know what Neil Simon says. Words with a K are funny.
TYG, her follow-up best seller is…
::pregnant pause::
“Oink”
We prefer the term “Bovine-American.” Moooo bakatcha. 
Fuckin’ bastardous smilies.
::Pregnant pause::
::Pregnant pause::
Upham, you magnificent bastard, you’re one lucky sumbiotch. A life surrounded by cows. I can but dream…
ssskuggiii, I’d love to see a cow trying to eat an orange. Maybe some enterprising young person will create a website dedicated to it.
You should’ve been in #straightdope when racinchikki and I were telling the city slickers how we had to go out and Scotch-Guard the cows…
Hmmm… I’m young… I’m enterprising… I’ll look into that.
Anyhoo, what do you all think of the word baboon?
Ladle,
ladle,
ladle,
I made it out of clay…
I thought this thread was going to be about Gary Larson’s Farside cartoon “Cow Tools.”
Apparently he’s not the only one that thinks cows are inherently funny. And yeah…I can see it too. Maybe not as much, but humourous. However, just thinking about a cow eating an orange made me burst out laughing, ssskuggiii. 
God bless the Arrogant Worms…
And lest we forget: the man-eating cows, from “The Tick”! Suspended over a pit of man-eating cows by a man with a chair for a head; I can feel my mind warping.
(I forget: were the crocodiles the natural enemies of the man-eating cows, or the other way around?)
And then of course there’s:
With relish!