I just got called a ‘fucktard’ on another messageboard.
It occured to me that this was a pretty lame sweary name.
I accosted the person for not thinking of something better like ‘cumsocket’ or ‘dickbag’
Then I thought to myself: Those people at the SDMB would probably be good at creative swearing.
And then this thread happened.
Thank you for the explanation as I’ve often wondered how some of your threads get started.
I assume you’re being sarcastic as I often explain my reasons for a thread.
I’m sorry you had to assume, I thought the sarcasm was clearer. My apologies.
My former boss once commented that if a certain decision didn’t go our office’s way we were going to be “el fucko”.
I still use that phrase sometimes.
Y’know, for a thread about swearing, this is pretty mild. I’d have expected something more like:
“Thank you for the explanation as I’ve often wondered how some of your threads get started, ya’ great moldy penile excrescence”
“I assume you’re being sarcastic as I often explain my reasons for a thread, you undersexed barnacle larvae”
“I’m sorry you had to assume, I thought the sarcasm was clearer. My apologies, you dog-vomit slime mold, you.”
Just trying to stay in the spirit of the OP 
I like “dog-vomit slime mold” because I’m too much of a knob-gobbler to really understand the other two.
If it wasn’t for the fact that I fear there could be malice in people’s sarcasm then I wouldn’t expose my naivety by asking if something was meant to be sarcastic.
You see I pathologically fear people being nasty to me because it makes me wonder what horrible thing I’ve done to them to deserve it.
Have I done anything horrible to you?
Yeah, you said my mother was a hamster and my father smelt of elderberries!
Now get on with you, you *cum dumpster!**.
*Not a personal attack, just in the spirit of the OP.
I care a great deal for “motherbitchass!”…
I like your basic old fashioned cursing, but tarted up a bit;
‘Perform fellatio on a deceased woodland creature’, instead of ‘Go blow a dead bear’.
‘Ingest excrement and expire’
That sort of thing; people find it … very disturbing.
For basic low level annoyance not worth the effort, my favorite is “Go fuck yourself sideways with a dead wolverine”.
Basic naming calling? It’s not very creative, but I find ‘shit-licker’ particularly offensive. I can’t use it.
I’m a bit handicapped by my parents’ advice that as soon as one descends to swearing, one has lost the argument.
What’s with the grovelling?!? Pro Choice Poster Boy! or girl, as the case may be
Stolen from Deadwood: “You undertaker-lookin’ son of a bitch!”
I had a gym teacher who used to call us "dickhole’ when we screwed up. I don’t hear that one enough anymore.
I like ‘assbitch’ and ‘asstard’, personally. Also ‘fucknugget’.
My personal fave is twatwaffle. I learned it here. I love the SDMB.
**j666 **- not swearing, but I frequently say “I must get all my waterfowl in proper alignment” before I can do something.
Then what happened?
You seismic douche trundler!
Meh, that’s the best I’ve got.
I turned into a supermarket aisle just in time to hear a guy say “Yes, dear” to his wife and then turn and say, under his breath, “slutbitchcuntwhorelesbocow”. I couldn’t help but laugh, and when she gave me a funny ‘why the hell is this guy laughing?’ look I totally lost it.
Personally, I prefer to make people have to think in order to be insulted. Refering to someone’s ‘notable paucity of distinct ancestors’ is my favorite.
Syphilitic Assblaster! It’s the first thing that popped into my head.
You’re a knob-gobbler???
First Wanda Sykes, now you? Wow