It really depends on whether or not this is a one time crazy drunk or a stalker. They guy who raped my friend started off by watching her through her windows at night so this isn’t necessarily a minor thing, but not every perv is a rapist either. I’d add some extra security to the place in the form of lights and make sure the door had a peephole. The bars are fine if it helps her to feel safe.
Since this just happened to me this past summer, I feel compelled to comment. Abbreviated version of my tale: single female living alone, peeping tom, not an isolated incident, police and detectives involved. My boyfriend offered for me to sleep at his place, offered to teach me how to shoot a gun, told me to call him if I felt unsafe, but didn’t order me to do anything.
That’s key. An incident like this is unnerving because you feel powerless. If there’s anywhere you should feel safe and private, it’s in the comfort of your own home. You want to listen to her concerns and do what you can to make her feel safe and secure, but if you order her to do anything, that’s just going to further her feelings of being a powerless victim.
I’m not sure that advice is real helpful, but when it comes to something like this, how you react really depends on the individual. All you can do is listen to her and support her choices.
When everyone calms down a bit, I think you’ll end up here. Most of the women I know, at some time in their lives, have had some guy expose himself to them. Is it disconcerting, absolutely! Is it possible he is going to ratchet up to rape or sexual assault? Certainly anything is possible.
But closing the blinds, in the evening, or spray on window frosting, could be all that’s required. Myself, I’d get one of those sensor lights, guaranteed this perv will find another place to jack off.
Pretty simple really, and, I suspect, what the police would recommend. Definitely tell security and the cops, who will keep their eyes open I’m sure. I understand everyone’s reactions, yours and hers, but give it couple of days, you may find everyone gets a little more circumspect with time.
Moving won’t solve anything - this stuff can and does happen anywhere, trust me - although I’m not quite in the “Meh, overreacting” camp either. Instead, this should serve as a reminder for both of you not to take stupid risks and to be aware of your surroundings (and perhaps to look into motion-triggered lights, as they’re good to have for a lot of reasons) but it should not cripple her with fear for the rest of her life.
Clearly. Chances are it was a fleeting thing. A jackass taking a short cut through the complex, who saw open curtains and took advantage of the opportunity. He could use a good swift kick in the gnads.
A repeat prowler is, of course, a different story. I regular peeping Tom whose skulking around the neighborhoods needs more than a kick in the gnads. The cops need to deal with it. And I’m all for being friendly with the neighbors. Neighbors talk. If there is a wacko in the neighborhood, chances are someone else had an encounter, then you know there is a bigger issue. If it’s a one-off, then at least other people might still be motivated to put up their own lights too. The more the merrier.
Female here.
This stuff happens. it sucks, and it does make you feel scared and powerless, but something like this happens to most women at some point. In the end, you can’t live your whole life based on fear. You can’t let a random pervert choose where you live. You can’t let them keep you running scared. That’s just letting them beat you, letting them win.
Learning, as a woman, to sleep at night alone in a house is a tough skill, but it’s a skill that will serve you well for the rest of your life. Learning to look a creep in the eye and tell him to get the fuck away from you is a skill that will serve you for the rest of your life. Creeps are looking for easy targets. They are looking for fear. They feed off of that. Don’t give it to them. The way to fight pervs, and not become a victim, is through strength and confidence.
Buy some bright, obnoxious motion sensor lights. Get her some pepper spray and learn how to use it- it takes practice. Consider a women’s self-defense class, where they will teach you what pervs are looking for and how to show them that you are not a good target.
I would go with the motion light outside and one of these locks for the patio door. (Link). You can add a second set of holes for it so you can have the patio door open a couple inches for ventilation and still have the door secure.
She should run up to his window and start furiously masturbating, yelling “shoe’s on the other foot now, asshole! How you like that you fucking jerk?” That’ll learn him.
Add my name to the list that think motion sensor lights are an appropriate response, not uprooting your entire lives.
And train your dog to only bark appropriately. Little jerk. 
Hey, mate–Buddy did his job! It’s a shame that puggles aren’t as intimidating as Rotties, but there you are.
GF has kind of digested the situation now. She has concluded that it’s probably a good idea to draw the blinds when in the house alone. She’d also been a bit lax about keeping the patio door locked; that won’t be a problem anymore, I think.
She’s more worried that he lives in our complex and that she’ll see him out; I’ve reassured her that he’d be more afraid of her in that situation. As noted above, it’s more likely he lives elsewhere and does his perving on the road. We live within spitting distance of two hotels–Senor Prevert may well be a non-native.
The oddest part of this whole thing is that the patio faces a semi-busy street and has more than a token amount of light on it already. That said, a motion light is probably a good idea.
Thanks, all.
Look into your local laws about land mines, booby traps, and explosives. The ultimate goal would be to have a button near the front. When you push it, anyone on the front porch, or front yard will… go away.
Oh god, this was too funny…
But echoing others, I would get the sensor light asap.
Stusblues, also make sure you have a small dowel in the bottom of your patio door if it’s a sliding glass door. Much stronger than a simple lock on it. Here’s a link.
Curtis would probably start yelling at the guy how he’s sinning for “burning with lust.”
Why a light? You want to see it better?
Try this next time:
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Open the door.
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If the guy steps into the house, shoot him (twice if necessary).
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Go outside.
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Close the door.
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Kick down the door.
Now I’m picturing a big, white-hot spotlight snapping on. 
Bargain-basement Mossberg pump action 12-gauge. The sound of the first shell being racked is the universal language of leave.:D:D:D
And music, don’t forget the music.
Patio doors are made of glass which makes the lock useless if the psycho decides he wants more.
Install a floodlight camera. There is quite a variety of floodlight cameras to choose from that will automatically record every time they come on.
And don’t call the police first, call a neighbor with a baseball bat.
If she’s really freaked out then move or teach her how to shoot.
Oh, please don’t move because of something some perverted creep did.
When this happened to me, the cops said it was their experience that these guys didn’t usually escalate. I found that very reassuring, because while a guy standing outside my window masturbating is unsettling, in the end it’s not enough to make me move.
Now I lived in a pretty crummy neighborhood at the time, but I’d just bought the house, no way I was going to move. And I’ll give the cops credit, they were there in, like, 45 seconds, despite the fact that I initially gave the wrong address (having just moved).
Keep the house secure, but keep in mind, it is really a LOT more trouble to break into a house than to stand outside. Peeping Toms are cowards.
If you want a weapon, I’ve heard good things about wasp spray. Long reach, similar result to pepper spray, and you can also use it to kill wasps. (I have only used it to kill wasps.)