Exactly. I’ll clear the table and leave the washing up either for the boys or for after
I think the “go away” signal is when you leave the guests alone to wash up. Ŵe arrange it so one person tidied as we go while the other stays with the guests.
It’s all so situation dependent. I’ve been to and hosted parties where cleaning up in the middle feels natural. I’ve also been to/hosted where it would be weird, bordering on rude. And in the latter case, one host cleaning while the other hangs with the guests would just be a slightly more polite way of signaling “time to go.”
We also only clean between courses: after dessert, no washing until people are gone. But yes, depends on the situation.
At someone else’s house, I would offer and expect to be told no thank you.
Those aren’t exceptions, though. Those are the norm. And that’s the part of clean up guests offer to help with.
What are y’all describing? A situation where the host takes your wine glass away and starts hand-washing it? I mean, yes, there’s always some clean up after the guests leave (unless it’s a house guest) but a lot of the clean up happens during the meal, in my experience.
We used to do this as well. Most important thing we carried was lots of drinking water.
ETA: I’ve never heard anyone think the “no love lost” phrase meant they actually loved each other. Who thought “most” Americans thought this? Very weird.
I don’t know what the others are describing, but I’m imagining something like, the host is washing all the dishes and spending more than 5-10 minutes doing it. That would seem to me like a signal to leave.
If it were a semi-elaborate cleanup between courses, I’d think the host was rather shy and didn’t like to socialize much and wanted an excuse to not be with the guests. Just scraping plates and stacking them for washing later is sufficient for me.
I mean, we “wash dishes” by scraping plates and putting them into the dishwasher. Stacking them only makes more work.
Back when dishwashers finished their cycle in 40 minutes, we sometimes did 2 loads of dishes during a long party. Now that it takes 3 hours, we don’t start it for the first time until the guests have left. That’s frustrating, because it leaves an awful lot of mess all over the kitchen while we have guests in the kitchen.
That sounds completely fine to me.
Re: Santa Claus. When I was very little, I got a present from Santa Claus, but I don’t think I knew or understood the surrounding mythology. I didn’t actively believe, but I didn’t question anything, either, and I never visited Santa or wrote letters to him. By 6 or 7 (can’t remember) I know I didn’t believe, because I remember the awkwardness of my mother being upset by my lack of belief, and both of us sort of pretending for one last year. (He brought me a Snoopy Snow-Cone Machine, if anyone cares.) [Edit: internet says that’s the Christmas when I was 8, so I probably still believed / didn’t question at 7]
I’m not sure I ever really believed in Santa Claus. I know that by the time I was six or seven, I knew he wasn’t real. Did I think he was real before that? I’m not sure. I do have a recollection of going to see him when I was two and the big fat man scared the shit out of me and I refused to approach him.
ETA: Not in a literal sense. I did not drop deuce on Santa. That would have made a better story, though!
My “something else” in the Santa poll is that I simply don’t remember.
I do know that as a very small child, I did truly believe in Santa Claus. I also seem to recall that I kept going along with the ruse for a few years after I got wise. The exact timing of my belief stoppage is therefore difficult to pinpoint.
I was the kid in kindergarten trying to convince others that Santa is fake news.
mmm
I don’t remember the exact year, but sometime in elementary school. I remember one year, I wrote him a letter, threatening to stop believing in him if he didn’t give me the toy I wanted that year. I don’t remember whether or not it worked. I suspect my belief was starting to wane at that point.
I don’t remember ever believing in Santa Claus; but I might have when I was really young. I have a few clear memories from quite far back, but only a few, and none of them concern Santa Claus one way or the other — wait, there’s one really vague one of being in line to see a Santa in a store, but I’m pretty sure I thought that was just a fun game. And I don’t know how old I was; and I’m not even sure that wasn’t just something I’d read about, and not an actual memory.
We weren’t Christians, and I doubt my parents took the whole thing seriously.
In the sense of “Yes Virginia”, Santa does exist. At a very early age, the presents were noted from Mom, Dad, and various relatives, never Santa, but the stocking was from Santa.
There were three camps in Kindergarten; the true believers, the heretics (like you), and the largest group which was “as long as you pretend Santa is real, the presents keep coming”. I was in the latter camp until the Santa gifts starting getting less important than sounding like a grownup.
How was Holly Flax left off the poll on favorite The Office characters?
She didn’t make the cut-off for number of episodes appeared in.
That said, she was still a significant member of the cast and I should have included her.
mmm
I know I didn’t believe in third grade, but I don’t remember whether I did in second grade.
Santa provided the stockings and one big unwrapped gift that we were allowed to play with[1]. The rest of the gifts, which could not be opened until after breakfast - and then only one at a time, were from our parents. They weren’t all labelled as such. My mother was creative - my brother got an NC State basketball from “Jim Valvano,” and I’d gotten a copy of “So Long and Thanks for All the Fish” from “The Dolphins,” as examples.
Probably so our parents could sleep. ↩︎