Disturbing Fortune Cookies

“Smile when you’re ready”.

I had no idea what to do.

I have one here that is great for the SDMB:

It came with the smilie.
A strange one that I once got was:

Unusual to who?

My entire table got fortune cookies printed in spanish…

…the restuarant was in Southeast Virginia.

:confused:

incubus and lieu, you are both very very evil. And funny.

Dave Letterman got a fake one once that read “PAY AND GET OUT, ROUND EYES!” Hee hee.

I get very disturbed if I feel my husband has reached for the fortune cookie that was meant for me. Mayhap I need to get a life.

Actually Cranky, I just got one that was meant for you- it says “Cranky, beware the BK onion rings…”

does this mean anything to you?

:smiley:

It means in 5 hours everyone around her will have a nose like Michael Jackson’s.

How funny! I have that very same fortune taped to my monitor right now. I work in a law firm and I found it fitting, somehow.

I just got one a couple of days ago:

Great, and now the “dog” is looking at me in a very creepy manner.

I’m surprised no one else has mentioned “Help, I’m being held captive in a Chinese fortune cookie factory”.

Circa 1982, my fortune was dull, and my date, whom I did not know well, looked bored. So I re-read it, acting surprised. He looks at me, sez “What does it say?”
I looked behind me for a suitable guy, and said, “That cop over there wrote ‘Meet me outside in ten minutes!’”
Date says “GN NERVE! PIG BD” and lunges out of his chair.
“No, no, I was kidding!”
He had to read the fortune before he believed me. Even then he went on a Pit-level rant about how cops were the embodiment of evil, date-stealing dogs, etc.

Yikes.

I have not played a practical joke on anyone, ever, since. Still like Chinese food, however, and agree empty cookies are creepy. When my son got a dud, to contain the trauma I told him “That means you can wish for anything you want!!!” He bought it. He’s a good little noodle-eatin’ boy.

:slight_smile:

“The night-time is meant for”

I think this was to give me license for whatever. I no longer have the fortune.

Chrome

Orange you glad you cracked open that cookie?

What, like none of you weren’t thinking of a fruity pun…

Someone slept with someone to get cough ahead at their job.

A friend of mine once got one that said something to the effect of “You or a friend will marry soon.”
Within a month a mutual friend of ours was dating someone new, within about three, he was engaged. I don’t think we ever he told him about the fortune.

My SO and I have been discussing the possibility of reproducing lately. We had Chinese about 2 weeks ago and my fortune was “God has given you a special blessing”. :eek:

His was something like “If you don’t ask, who will?” :confused: